


The Need to Know

by xxMad_Donaxx



Series: A Mage's Haven [1]
Category: Dragon Age
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe, Bonding, Knotting, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Mpreg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-21
Updated: 2013-04-25
Packaged: 2017-11-12 14:59:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 40
Words: 70,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/492453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xxMad_Donaxx/pseuds/xxMad_Donaxx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As far as I know this is the first Dragon Age fic with Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamics. This website can give you a run down on just what it is if you don't know.<br/>http://fanlore.org/wiki/Alpha/Beta/Omega </p><p>Only mages are omega and almost all of them are in a Circle of Magi. Apostates are very rare and Anders has been in Kirkwall for just under a year. He's searching for answers on why less mages are being born every year. One night he breaks into the Chantry seeking answers and has a fateful encounter with Devin Hawke.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Since this prompt showed up on the kmeme I can hardly concentrate on anything but this. Response on the meme has been generally good so I decided to go ahead and post it here as well.
> 
> I don't appreciate rude comments. If this isn't to your liking move on. No one's twisting your arm. Bottom Anders was part of the prompt. I'm also not ashamed of my optimistic view of his character.

Anders didn’t venture above Lowtown very often. For him, it was much safer there or in Darktown where he lived. He was an apostate, one of the very few mages that wasn’t imprisoned in a circle. Templars were vigilant in hunting mages. It took skill and cunning to avoid them.

It’s for your own protection he’d been told by his father when he was locked in the cellar after his magic had manifested. Two days later he’d been taken to the Ferelden Circle of Magi. At first, he believed some of their nonsense. Not about the magic. Magic was useful and most mages could resist demons perfectly fine. All mages were omega and he had believed that they needed protection from alphas. Anders had been twelve when his magic had manifested and had some knowledge of what the world was like before he’d been locked away. It couldn’t have always been like this.

If the Chantry was truly protecting mages like they claimed, why were so many Templars alpha? Why they were not allowed any contact with their families or why Templars were allowed the abuses they weren’t punished for? This was their idea of protection? The mages were given a potion regularly that suppressed their heat cycles but accidents happened. The children born were always taken away. It didn’t seem fair.

So he escaped again and again seeking answers to the questions that plagued him. He learned much during his brief periods of freedom, how to hide being the most important. Mages were feared more for the dangers of demons and blood magic than anything else. When he had been made a Grey Warden he had access to the Keep’s library. It was here that he discovered that fewer mages were being born every year.

His need to know why had led him to accept Justice’s proposal. The body that the spirit had inhabited was rotting quickly. Hoping that they could accomplish together what Anders was having trouble doing alone they had gone into the woods. The Templar that had been sent to keep an eye on him had followed them. Anders had been caught just after their joining and all Rolan had seen was abomination. Justice had taken over…then Anders had fled to Amaranthine and the first ship headed out of Ferelden.

Chance or fate had taken him to Kirkwall. With a Circle present it was easy to get the things he needed to make a heat suppressant. It was also easy to blend in with all the other Fereldan refugees. If he was careful, and he had been very careful, not to use his magic he could be just another refugee. He would have access to information in the Chantry that he never would have seen before.

That had been the plan. He hadn’t counted on Hightown being full of alphas. The Chantry was in Hightown and he wanted the information they were surely keeping secret. Anders had stayed mostly in Darktown and Lowtown, where most of the betas lived. There were a few alphas in Lowtown but not too many and they were easily avoided. He’d watched and waited for the perfect opportunity. With most of Hightown’s alphas at the Viscount’s Keep, tonight will be his best chance to sneak in.

He kept to the shadows as he climbed the stairs looking around constantly. Quietly he ran across the open courtyard to an alley that led around to a less used entrance. Having obtained plans of the building that loomed above him, Anders knew that this was the closest entrance to the library. With one last look around he tried the door handle.

“Why can’t anything be easy,” he muttered.

“Need some help with that?” a voice asked from the end of the alley.

“Who’s there,” Anders asked quietly as he turned.

“Just someone else who wants to break into the Chantry,” the voice said. It was far closer this time and Anders took a step back.

“How do you know that?” Anders said scanning the small alley and still not finding anything.

“Because you’re not very good at sneaking,” said a man who materialized a few feet away from him. He stepped into the faint light and Anders stared. His short black hair was stuck up in spikes that had been swept back. There were delicate lines tattooed along his cheekbones and his smooth jaw. His smile was as teasing as his voice. “I’ve been following you for quite a while now.”

Anders shut his mouth with a click of his teeth. My luck, he thought, to get caught by the handsomest alpha I’ve ever seen. The man quirked an eyebrow at him as he moved closer and Anders took a nervous step back and gestured at the door. “Apparently I’m not very good with locked doors either,” he said nervously.

“Relax,” the man said with a broad grin. “I won’t tell anyone we broke into the Chantry if you won’t.”

“Certainly not,” Anders said with a nervous laugh. If this man had wanted to hurt him it would have been easy enough before now. He also wasn’t going to get in without using his magic somehow and he certainly wasn’t going to do that with him blocking the way out. The man pulled something out of the leathers he wore and bent to the door handle. Seconds later he looked over his shoulder and winked as he pushed the door open. Anders followed him in.

“What’s your name?” he asked quietly.

“Anders,” he whispered following after him. He seemed to be going in the direction Anders needed to go as well.

“I can see that silly,” the man chuckled. “Where are you going anyway?”

“Really, my name is unpronounceable,” said Anders. “The library. What’s yours?”

“Hmm, a challenge,” he said looking over his shoulder briefly. “Well Anders, Devin Hawke is always up to a challenge.” They came to the door that led into the library and Hawke opened the door cautiously. “This is where we part my friend. What I need is a little further on.”

“Thank you,” Anders said.

Hawke nodded his head and disappeared into the shadows. Anders stepped inside and shut the door. Rows upon rows of books stood in neat lines throughout the large room. Only a little daunted he walked quietly to the back of the room, towards a section that was closed off from the rest. There was another locked door to get through before he could begin his search.

He looked around cautiously and seeing that there was still no one around, turned back to the lock. Anders placed the door handle between his hands and used his magic to melt it. This would have been easier and less messy if he wasn’t horrible with force magic. With the door handle melted into a puddle of liquid metal at his feet it took a simple push and the door swept inward on silent hinges.

Pushing the door mostly shut as he entered a spell wisp bobbed suddenly over his shoulder, bathing the room in soft light. Starting at the shelves closest to the door, he carefully went over the titles. The restricted section was a square room lined with bookshelves. A desk and chair sat in the middle of the small room. He didn’t know exactly what he was looking for but that didn’t discourage him in the least. The Chantry was hiding something from them and he was determined to find out what.

“Time to…a mage!”

Anders turned to the doorway, his staff in hand and banished the spell wisp. “Hawke!” he said in a strangled whisper. 

The rogue shook his head and leaned forward, grabbing his free hand. He was pulled along behind Hawke and Anders tried not to panic. “No time,” Hawke said. “I’ve attracted some unwanted company.”

He allowed himself to be led back through the dim hallways thinking furiously. Once they were back outside in the alley Hawke stopped suddenly. Anders pulled out of his grasp and backed away, looking at the mouth of the alley. Unless they wanted to go back through the Chantry, their only exit was blocked by a dozen Templars. 

“It looks like we’re having a bad day,” Hawke said mildly before drawing his daggers. 

Hawke disappeared into the shadows of the alley, leaving Anders facing a dozen Templars. He took another step backward and thought desperately, help me Justice. With the spirit’s power added to his own he began casting spells. Lightning and fire lit up the alley, the small space worked to his advantage as they never got close to him. 

The last one fell and Justice receded. With the blue glow gone the alley had fallen dark and quiet once more. Anders ran for the exit slowing only to climb over the pile of bodies he had created. He was pushed from behind suddenly and he stumbled out into the courtyard. Turning slightly he swung the bladed end of his staff at the Templar standing just to the side of the entrance to the alley he’d just come out of.

The blade of his staff clanged against his armor and Anders threw ice and then stone. The Templar froze and shattered an instant later. There was movement on the ground and he readied another spell but let go of the mana. Devin Hawke lay half in the alley trying to get up but falling back to the stone lined ground. The back of his head glistened wetly and Anders stood still in indecision.

He had been pushed and Hawke had taken the blow meant for him. Anders turned away and felt a vague sense of disapproval. If he hadn’t been pushed it would be him lying there and he’d wake up in the Gallows. Anders groaned as he turned back. 

“This is stupid, Anders,” he muttered kneeling down. He healed the head wound but Hawke was still unconscious. “Stupid, stupid, stupid.” Anders leaned his staff against the wall and managed to get Hawke over his shoulder. Staggering a little under the unconscious man’s weight, he grabbed his staff and hurried as fast as he could to the stairs that led to the Undercity. 

It took longer to get back to his clinic than he would have liked. Once there, he dumped Hawke onto one of the cots and turned to close the door. Anders leaned against it, breathing heavily and slowly slid down the door until he was sitting. He wrapped his arms around his knees and stared at the still unconscious man.

“What am I going to do?” Anders whispered.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of their personal history is going to be slightly different. =)

Anders sat there watching him sleep and tried to gain control of the fear that gripped him. Hawke had saved him but his intentions were unclear. He knew Anders was a mage, an omega…and he was an alpha.

Shaking his head, Anders stood. It was useless to sit here and worry. Until Hawke woke he couldn’t be sure of anything. He had seemed like a nice person though. He lit some of the lanterns in the clinic and filled a large bowl with water from his pump. Anders heated the water until it was warm and went back to the cot Hawke slept on. Setting it on the ground, he found a clean rag and pulled a stool over to the cot.

He dropped the rag into the water and sat on the stool. Rolling Hawke carefully onto his side, he checked his hasty healing. Satisfied that there was no damage left he dipped his fingers into the water and wrung out the rag. Anders cleaned as much blood out of his hair as he could. Washing his hands again he wiped the excess water on his trousers. After checking that his heart was still beating strong and regular he dumped the pink water down the drain and sat on the cot opposite Hawke to wait.

The clinic was quiet and Anders fought to stay awake. His eyes drifted shut several times before he gave in to his need for sleep. Lying on his side with his knees tucked in close to his chest he finally let himself drift off to the Fade.

Tapping, a tapping on his nose, Anders mumbled sleepily, “Go ‘way Pounce.”

“Who’s Pounce?”

Anders eyes snap open and upon seeing Hawke only inches away from him, jerked backwards falling off the cot. He groaned as he rolled over and sat up. Hawke, his forearms resting on the cot peered over the edge at him. His eyes alight with amusement and with that same teasing tone in his voice from the night before he said, “A little jumpy aren’t you.”

“Do you always try to scare people to death right after they wake up?” Anders said scowling.

“Not usually,” Hawke said with an easy smile. “You’re the one who brought me home.”

“I…couldn’t just leave you there,” Anders said softly, looking down at his lap. “Thank you.”

“Letting you get locked up would be criminal of me,” said Hawke.

Anders looked up and saw that he was now sitting on the cot his legs crossed, arms resting on his knees with that teasing smile and he couldn’t help but smile back. “And breaking into the Chantry isn’t?” he asked scooting back to rest against the wall behind him. 

“Mans got to make a living somehow,” Hawke shrugged. “So, who’s Pounce?”

“Ser-Pounce-a-Lot, my cat.” Anders looked up at Hawke. So far this conversation wasn’t going at all like he thought it would.

“You named a cat Ser-Pounce-a-Lot,” Hawke said. The teasing smile never left his face as he shook his head. “Where is this poor creature?”

“Vigil’s Keep in Ferelden,” said Anders. “I couldn’t go back for him after…” He stopped speaking, wondering if he should be telling his life history to someone he hardly knew.

“An Anders Fereldan with a cat named Ser-Pounce-a-Lot who happens to be an apostate that glows. You must have quite the story,” said Hawke his voice turning slightly serious. “Just what was that glowing anyway?”

“I…didn’t…,” Anders stuttered. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath trying to calm his suddenly fluttering stomach. He’d never told anyone about Justice before, scared that they would react like Rolan had. When he opened his eyes Hawke was in front of him, all his weight resting on his toes with his hands clasped together in front of him. Anders tried to scoot further back but he was already flush against the wall.

“Relax,” said Hawke his voice a low soothing purr. “You have nothing to fear from me. My mother was an apostate.”

“She…really?” Anders said unable to contain his curiosity. There were so few mages outside of the circle who were able to stay free. “Was your father an alpha?”

“That’s right,” Hawke said his smile returning. “He taught me a lot of things. I have a sister but she was taken to the Fereldan Circle when she was seven. I also have a brother.”

Hawke leaned forward slightly and Anders scrambled to the side and stood. He put the cot between them and worked to steady his breathing as Hawke stood and turned calmly. “Maker, you’re like a frightened rabbit. What do they teach you at the circle?” he asked sounding amused.

“To fear,” Anders said nervously. “But I have…special circumstances.” He watched Hawke closely as he sat back down on the cot, legs crossed and facing him once more. With his elbows resting on his knees Hawke laced his fingers together and rested his chin on them.

“Do tell,” Hawke said. “I promise I’ll stay right here.”

The reassuring tone of his voice was soothing. Anders sat on the cot Hawke had slept on and found he was not quite as frightened. He took a deep breath and began speaking, his voice surprisingly steady considering the flutter that was settled firmly in his stomach.

“The last time I was caught, the Templars stopped at Vigil’s Keep but it was attacked by darkspawn. This was just after the blight was ended. The Templars ended up dead and I was conscripted into the Wardens.” Anders watched Hawke closely but there was no outward sign of what he thought. “When I traveled with the Wardens, we came across a spirit of Justice who’d been trapped outside the Fade. The corpse he possessed continued to rot. I’m…possessed by that spirit. That’s what the blue glow is, Justice.”

“My,” Hawke said mildly. “You do have a lot to worry about. You don’t look much like an abomination though.”

“It’s different,” Anders said defensively. “He’s a spirit not a demon.”

“No need to get touchy,” Hawke said sounding amused again. “You’ve already got my trust.” His voice turned warm and he touched the back of his head with one hand as he said, “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Anders said quietly. 

Hawke stood and ran a hand through his hair. “If you’ll excuse me, I have some unfinished business to attend to, until we meet again.” He walked to the doorway and paused, turning back to Anders. His dark brown eyes sparkled, his smile wide as he said, “Soon I think.”

“You’re coming back?” Anders asked feeling half panicked and half excited. After spending so much time practically alone the thought of someone wanting to be around him was a foreign concept. It was exciting and terrifying at the same time.

“Of course,” Hawke said. He flashed a smile and then disappeared through the door.

Anders sat on the cot staring at the closed door for a minute, wondering why the thought of seeing him again excited him so much. If Devin Hawke did happen to show up again he could ask about his family. He didn’t get much of a chance to search the Chantry library but maybe last night wasn’t a total waste.

He stood and opened the door to his clinic. Seeing no one in the area, he carefully lit the lamps. As long as he was up he might as well be open. Healing the refugees and the other residents of Darktown had started as a means to survive. Even if it was strictly charity, they were grateful and gave him what they could. Anders didn’t charge for his services and these people couldn’t spare the coin to go anywhere else.

What he didn’t get he could usually find in the outlying areas. There were a few very important things he had to steal when he couldn’t scrounge enough coin to buy them. It was a fairly lonely existence, much different from the circle or the Wardens. He didn’t let it get to him though. Finding out why fewer mages were being born was too important.

People began entering shortly and Anders’ worries were forgotten for a while. He rarely used his magic, preferring more mundane methods. It was safer. Sometimes he had to use a bit of healing magic on a patient because nothing else would work. He made sure to hide his hands and gave them a bit of colored sugar water to drink. Most left better than they had come in however and that satisfied him in a way nothing else had.

The morning passed in a comfortable pattern. Cleaning scraps, wrapping wounds, helping a baby with the sniffles, eating whatever he had between patients, it was calming. The calm didn’t last long however, Hawke sauntered in followed by two others around midday. The few people that had been waiting made excuses or simply rushed out. Hawke didn’t look like he’d even changed clothes. He wore the same leathers that he’d had last night, close fitting trousers and tunic with leather armor and gloves with the fingers cut off. Hawke smiled disarmingly as he made his way to the back of the room where Anders was bandaging a cut.

His patient was nervous and Anders didn’t blame him. He finished quickly and the man hurried out, leaving him alone with Hawke and the two others. Anders studied the other two as Hawke sat on the cot in front of him.

One was human, short black hair, piercing blue eyes, a sullen glower with the largest sword he’d ever seen strapped to his back. He bore a slight resemblance to Hawke and Anders thought that maybe he was the brother Hawke had mentioned. The other was a dwarf, a beardless dwarf. He had blonde hair, warm brown eyes and a face that seemed like it should always carry a smile. They were both betas.

“Guess I’m next,” Hawke said his voice and smile with that teasing hint.

“Err…,” Anders said as he stood up and took a step back. “Can I…help you?”

“Not at the moment,” said Hawke. “But I’m going to help you.”

“I didn’t think I needed any help,” Anders said cautiously taking another step back. 

“Did you know,” Hawke said sliding off the cot with an almost cat-like grace. The other two stayed where they were on the other side of the cot. “That there’s an apostate in the city.”

Anders was frozen to the spot. “Really,” he said with a calmness he didn’t feel. He watched as Hawke moved, circling him like a cat toying with a mouse.

“Really,” said Hawke his voice turning serious. “One of my friends in the guard told me this morning that they found thirteen Templars by the Chantry late last night. All killed by magic.” Hawke stopped behind him and leaned in close to his ear. His voice was soft enough that only Anders could have heard his next two words. “Trust me.”

“That’s…terrible,” Anders said struggling to keep his voice from trembling. “But what does that have to do with me?”

Hawke circled back around and plucked a loose feather from his shoulder. He leaned back on the cot running the feather along his jaw line. “Nothing probably,” he said smiling. “I just thought you could use a few days out of Kirkwall. I have a little errand I should have done ages ago on Sundermount. Your…skills…would be appreciated.”

“All…all right,” Anders said nervously.

“Carver Hawke,” said Hawke gesturing to the human over his left shoulder. “And Varric Tethras.” He gestured to the dwarf standing over his right shoulder. “Pack your things, it’s time to fly.” Hawke held the feather on his palm and blew gently. Anders watched it drift slowly down and wondered just what he was getting himself into this time.


	3. Chapter 3

Anders hurriedly put clothes into his pack, counting the days quickly in his head. He moved over to the cabinet where he stored his healing potions. Dropping a bunch of them on top of his extra clothes, he reached to the back of cabinet. Moving aside some of the potions he took one of the bottles of heat suppressant and put it in his pouch. There was still a week before he would need it but it was far better to have it with him…especially wandering around in the woods with an alpha so close.

Tying the pack shut he turned, slinging it to his back as he went, Hawke tossed him his staff. It looked more like a spear than a staff, the enchantments covered with leather he’d wrapped around the wood. Other than the leather it was completely unadorned. Hawke smiled and gestured at the door. Anders blew out the lanterns as he followed them to the door. They waited while he locked it and blew out the lanterns on the outside.

Hawke walked to one side of him and the dwarf, Varric, on the other. Carver followed along behind. They were all quiet and Anders tried not to look as nervous as he felt. The relative safety of Darktown was left behind and Hawke steered him in the direction of Hightown. The people mostly ignored them as they made their way through the hexes of Lowtown.

“Is our friend still trailing?” Hawke asked quietly, still looking ahead of them.

“He is,” Varric said just as quietly.

Anders resisted an urge to flee, but he did jump when Hawke moved closer and put his arm around his shoulders. His voice was low but they kept moving as he spoke close to Anders’ ear. “Don’t panic. There’s a Templar following us.” Anders stumbled as his feet tried to stop moving but he was pushed along by Hawke. “He’s following me not you. Stay calm, I’ll keep you free.”

Unsure of what to do with this information he simply nodded. There had to be a reason Hawke wanted him out of the city. It was still unclear what his intentions truly were though. The most likely reason was that he wanted Anders for himself. This thought didn’t terrify him as much as it should and that was worrisome.

Varric fell back a pace and began talking with Carver. Hawke still had his arm around Anders’ shoulders and it was very distracting. “How long have you been in Kirkwall,” Hawke said conversationally as they climbed the stairs to Hightown.

“Almost a year,” he said glancing over at him. There seemed to be genuine interest in his features.

“I’m impressed,” Hawke said actually sounding impressed. “Maybe you’re sneakier than I thought.”

“You learn,” Anders said vaguely. “Are you from Ferelden?”

“I am,” said Hawke smiling. “Carver and I have been here for about a year and a half.”

There were several things Anders wanted to ask. Those questions were all dangerous with a Templar following and so many people around. They were walking through Hightown now and these people gave them disdainful looks. Anders knew they would be out of the city soon and hoped to have a chance to ask his questions.

Hawke waved to one of the guards on the way out of the gate. Finally letting go of Anders, Hawke led them in the direction of a high mountain peak that loomed over the city. Anders had been to the base of Sundermount many times looking for elfroot, berries or any other plant he could use. He didn’t go very far up the mountain trail because of the Dalish camp.

He’d met a Dalish mage when he was with the Wardens. She was the most disagreeable person he’d ever met. Anders had only tried talking to her a couple of times. Even though they were the only two mages in the entire arling of Amaranthine, she’d brushed him off with curt replies that bordered on rude.

The Dalish weren’t a very friendly people anyway. Their nomadic lifestyle mostly kept them ahead of Templars and their hostile attitude towards anyone who wasn’t an elf ensured that they were mostly left to themselves. Because they were independent of the circle, Anders was desperately curious about how many of them were born alpha and omega.

City elves were mostly beta with an occasional alpha. They had an affinity for magic and there were more elf mages in the tower than human ones. There wasn’t much known about the Dalish though. He knew they didn’t lock up their mages and they might be able to provide some clues about why mages were so rare. Anders didn’t have a death wish however and steered well clear of them.

Hawke leaned closely again when the city gates had disappeared behind them. “Keep on this path and stay with Carver and Varric,” he said. His tone was serious and there was a note of authority in his voice. “I’ll be right back.”

He veered off into the woods and disappeared immediately. Now that he was with two completely unfamiliar people it was hard for him to hide his nerves. Not that he was all that familiar with Hawke but he at least was somewhat known.

“Easy Blondie,” Varric said stepping up next to him. “Hawke’s just gone to take care of our tail.”

“Stupid Templar wouldn’t be there if Devin hadn’t gotten careless,” Carver said from behind him. Even his voice was sullen.

“Careless?” Anders asked nervously.

Carver went on like Anders hadn’t spoken. “I don’t understand where you come into all this.” Anders frowned when he felt Carver poke his shoulder. “Simple job he said. Be back before morning he said. Comes back well after sunrise looking like the cat who’s got the cream and we’re hustled out the door to go charging up mountains without an explanation.”

“Can’t say I like the outdoors bit myself but he did say he’d explain when we ditched the problem,” Varric said diplomatically. “Besides, he always looks like that.”

Anders didn’t particularly like the direction this strange conversation was headed. If Hawke was the cat that made him the cream and he found himself wondering just what he’d gotten into again. He wondered what his chances of escape were if he just bolted. There was no way the dwarf would catch him but he had a crossbow that certainly could. His chances of outrunning the heavily muscled human behind him were decent but…

“Ouch!” Carver exclaimed from behind him, breaking his train of thought. “Devin!”

He heard Varric chuckle as he turned to see what had happened. Carver was rubbing the back of his head and glaring at his brother. Anders saw an extremely irritated look on Hawke’s face for a split second before the teasing smile returned.

“You need to be more flexible Carver,” Hawke said, his tone also light and teasing. “There’s no need to frighten the brave apostate that saved your poor brothers life.”

Anders turned back around, more nervous than ever. How could he trust Hawke when he’d just revealed his secret? The other two didn’t seem surprised however.

“What sort of heroics did you pull this time?” asked Carver clearly annoyed.

“If he’s an apostate,” Varric said with an amused smile. “His biggest worry right now is you Hawke.”

Suddenly Hawke was in front of them walking backwards. “Apostate yes, omega no. You see, our new friend is possessed by a spirit of Justice. That’s changed him into a beta somehow. His biggest worry is Templars, not me.”

Anders eyes widened slightly at the lie the flowed smoothly. Hawke and Varric stopped walking so he did too, wondering if the other two would believe such an obvious lie.

“Possessed?” Carver said warily from behind him. “He’s an abomination?”

Hawke turned Anders around and stepped away slightly. Carver was a few steps behind watching him closely. “Does he look like an abomination?” Hawke asked.

“Well…no,” said Carver hesitantly.

“How do you know he’s beta though?” Varric asked. “You know we can’t tell like they can.”

“I told him,” Anders said deciding to take a chance on this enigmatic man.

“See?” Hawke said cheerfully. “Nothing to worry about.”

Carver looked doubtful but Varric just shrugged. “Did you get rid our friend back there?” he asked.

“One less Templar in the world,” Hawke said as they began walking again.

“If the Templar was following you, why did you bring me along?” Anders asked. “I’ve been safe enough in Darktown before.”

“You were seen carrying me in Lowtown,” Hawke said without turning around. “Eventually the fools will put us together at the Chantry.”

“Were you at the Chantry together?” Carver asked.

“Who do you think killed all those Templars?” Hawke asked.

“What was I supposed to do?” said Anders defensively. “You just disappeared.”

“I wasn’t going to just leave you there,” Hawke said slowing to walk beside him, his voice warm. His smile was honest for a second before the teasing quality returned. “But then you started glowing and I figured it best to stay out of your way.”

“So how did the brave apostate save you o fearless leader,” Carver said sarcastically.

“There was a Templar I didn’t see. Hawke pushed me out of the way…took the hit,” Anders said quietly.

“Heroics,” Carver snorted.

“Devin,” Hawke said softly bumping his shoulder.

Anders returned his smile and listened as their conversation wandered elsewhere. He wondered at the lie Hawke had told the other two. He didn’t think there was anything that could change your status like Hawke had claimed. They had seemed to believe it though. Perhaps it would make him less desirable, keep him a bit safer. Hawke knew the truth though and he couldn’t help but wonder.

He had chosen to confirm the lie, further tying himself to Hawke. It didn’t look like he had any intentions of letting Anders fade back into Darktown. He wasn’t sure what bothered him more, the thought of being alone again or that he didn’t really want Hawke to leave him alone.


	4. Chapter 4

Their first battle together had been interesting. The others knew he was a mage and Anders saw no reason to hold back. He did wait a few minutes to see how well the other three fought together and how his skills would be put to the best use.

Hawke and Carver fought together seamlessly. Carver’s brute strength blending well with Hawke’s lithe grace, they danced around each other with deadly accuracy. It was easy to see that they had fought together many times and the giant spiders hardly touched either of them. Varric peppered the battlefield with bolts from his crossbow and Anders used the augmentation spells he knew as well as his primal spells when he got a clear shot. They hadn’t needed any of his healing skills that time but Anders knew they would at some point. His time with the Wardens had taught him that no matter how skilled or lucky the fighter, wounds were inevitable.

Varric had been impressed and even Carver had to admit that Anders was useful. Hawke had a smug ‘I told you so’ look that lasted for at least an hour. The rest of the day had been rather peaceful and as they set up camp for the night Anders began thinking. This was a perfect opportunity to ask Hawke about his family. 

There were rabbits roasting over the fire as they sat around it. Varric polished his crossbow, named Bianca apparently, and Carver turned the rabbits. Hawke lay on his bedroll, propped on one elbow, knees bent and facing the flames. Anders sat slightly apart from them, hugging his legs and resting his chin on his knees.

“Hawke,” Anders said quietly. “Can I ask you some things?”

“Only if you call me Devin,” Hawke said looking up at him. The corners of his lips quirked up in that smile and the firelight sparkled in his dark eyes.

“Devin,” said Anders smiling. “What were they like? Your parents I mean.”

“They loved each other very much,” Hawke said looking back at the fire. “Mother was kind and gentle, Father…everyone said I’m just like him.”

“That’s because you are,” Carver said almost resentfully.

Hawke rolled his eyes before continuing. “They were bonded and when Mother fell ill…Father didn’t take Mother’s death very well. It was almost like he’d lost a part of himself.”

“How did your mother escape the circle?” Anders asked.

“She was never in a circle,” Hawke said looking up at him again, his gaze somehow knowing. “Her magic manifested late and we were told grandfather Amell paid through the nose to keep her out of the circle. They hid her away somewhere with a tutor but Father worked at the Amell estate for years. They were already in love the first time she went into heat. Father found her anyway and they fled Kirkwall to Ferelden.”

“Is that why you came to Kirkwall? Do you still have family here?”

“You can hardly call Uncle Gamlen family,” Carver snorted. “The scandal Mother created left the Amell’s penniless.”

“Uncle Gamlen is only part of why we came here,” Hawke said, his voice taking on a slightly serious note. “The…person…that this fun jaunt up the mountain is for, told us that our sister is in the Gallows.”

“What’s her name?” asked Anders. The mages in Kinloch hold had all been very close. By sticking together they were able to avoid most trouble with the Templars. If she had been there, it was very likely that Anders knew her.

“Bethany Hawke,” Hawke said looking up with a slightly hopeful expression.

“She’s probably here,” Anders said after a moment of thought. “She was transferred with my friend Karl Thekla right before my last escape.”

“Looks like I found what I was looking for after all,” Hawke said turning to look at Carver.

Carver’s scowl deepened as he said, “Are you still on about this? Even Father told you it wasn’t your fault.”

“She’s your _twin_ Carver,” Hawke said. A small note of anger colored his words. “How can you accept this?”

“Because if you go charging in there the Templars will kill you!” Carver exclaimed angrily.

“Then I’ll just have to be sneaky,” Hawke said calmly.

“Stubborn ass,” Carver muttered shaking his head. 

It had the feel of an old argument, one that neither of them ever won. Anders glanced at Varric, who shook his head slightly and continued to concentrate on his crossbow. He tried to look small and decided that he could ask the rest of his questions later. It hadn’t been his intention to start an argument and he felt a little guilty for it.

“My turn,” Hawke said suddenly as he sat up and turned to face Anders. “What were you doing? The Chantry isn’t the safest place for a mage.”

“That’s…complicated,” Anders said hesitantly. 

“We’ve got time,” Hawke said, his smile resurfacing quickly.

Hawke listened intently as Anders explained his self-appointed mission. How he’d found extensive records in the old Arl’s private library, his doubts about the Chantry’s protection and his fears that the Chantry knew fewer mages were born every year. “I have to know why,” Anders finished.

“Maybe I can help,” Hawke said when he’d finished.

“Really?” said Anders in surprise. “What’s the catch?”

“No catch,” Hawke said. “I don’t like the way the Chantry tears up families.”

“I…Thank you,” Anders said quietly.

Hawke nodded and the others went on to talk of other things while Anders listened. After they had eaten Anders removed his coat and folded it up around his pouch. He lay down and tried to quiet his mind but he couldn’t. No matter how hard he tried he couldn’t put Hawke out of his thoughts. Hawke had saved him from the Gallows once, probably twice now and even offered to help him find out why there were so few mages. He had lied to Varric and Carver, his own brother.

Hawke had taken first watch and was sitting on a rock not far from their camp. Anders waited until the other two were asleep before he stood and made his way quietly over to where Hawke sat. He patted the rock next to him and Anders sat after a moment’s hesitation. 

“Can’t sleep?” Hawke asked quietly.

“No,” Anders said just as softly. He turned to look at him and the darkness turned his eyes almost black. Moonlight gave the rest of his face a soft glow and he could clearly see the smile he always seemed to wear. “Why did you lie to the others?”

“Is it a lie?” he asked mysteriously. “I’ve spent quite a bit of time in the Undercity the last year and a half and I’ve never felt an omega in heat. Of course, you could have a way to suppress that.”

“I’ve never seen you there,” Anders said frowning. 

“If I don’t want you to see me, my frightened little rabbit, you’re not going too,” Hawke said patiently.

“What do you want from me?” Anders whispered, feeling more like the rabbit he was compared to than anything else at that moment.

“Nothing you aren’t willing to give,” Hawke said soothingly. “Go to sleep. We’ll reach the Dalish camp tomorrow.”

Anders nodded absently and made his way back to his bedroll, feeling more confused than ever. 

***

After dispatching a group of mercenaries Anders tried to hide his excitement. Without paying much attention to Hawke or the others, he looked past the two irritable guards and into the camp. Even if he didn’t get to speak with any of them, which seemed to be best considering how much trouble Hawke was having at getting them inside, seeing a glimpse of their way of life could give him some information.

The mood of the camp seemed cautious. Children were held back by their parents as the group of strangers was led past. Like their city cousins, most of the elves he saw were beta with a few alphas wandering among them. He saw one young omega, recently come into his magic as they were led to the back of the camp. 

Warriors they could see watched them warily and more that they couldn’t, had arrows trained on each of them. The landships that they traveled in sat in two neat rows. They were being led straight through to where a young woman stood with an older woman. There were two men standing close by them, one old one young. As they got closer, Anders was astonished to discover that both of the women were mages.

Hawke stopped in front of the two women and the older of them looked them each over in turn. Varric and Carver both merely glanced at but her gaze lingered on him before fixing on Hawke. Anders moved a little further behind Hawke and tried to listen to them but his attention was captured by the young woman.

She was very pretty but it wasn’t her short black hair or large green eyes that held him mesmerized. It was her slightly rounded belly. After someone elbowed him in the side, he brought his gaze back up to her face. She smiled innocently at him but the alpha elf looming over her shoulder glared. Thoroughly embarrassed, he slid further behind Hawke and forced himself to pay attention. 

“Are you going to teach me this ritual?” Hawke asked the older woman. 

“I’ll send my First with you. She will perform the ritual,” she said calmly.

“First? First of what?”

“You would call her my heir, or apprentice.” She gestured to the young woman at her side. “Merrill will guide you and perform the rite for the departed. Bring the amulet back to me and your debt will be repaid.”

“Great,” Carver said from beside him. “More hiking.”

“Just think of it as training Carver,” Hawke said cheerfully. “There are nasty things up there or so I hear.”

“This way,” Merrill said gesturing up a path behind her.

Carver grumbled as they followed Merrill and the elf that had been standing behind her. As they walked Merrill fell in beside him instead of Hawke, letting the other elf lead with Hawke. She smiled up at him and Anders smiled nervously back. “Is he yours?” she asked curiously.

“What?” Anders asked in horrified confusion. There was light laughter from everyone around him. 

“Sadly, no,” Hawke said looking over his shoulder at them.

Anders groaned softly and concentrated on his boots. It was going to be a long day.


	5. Chapter 5

“Oh, I’m sorry,” she said. “That was probably rude.”

“A little,” Hawke replied, flashing his smile at her. “Are you a mage too?”

“Yes,” Merrill said cheerfully.

“How long will it take to get to the alter at the top?” Anders asked determined to change the subject.

“We’ll be there before the sun sets but we shouldn’t linger,” Merrill said. “Evil things are restless on Sundermount. We should be quick. Asha’bellanar isn’t known for her patience, either.”

“What do you know of Flemeth?” Hawke asked.

“Only stories,” Merrill said. “Her legends are the same everywhere. If you’ve truly met her you’re lucky to be alive.”

“So we’ll get to hike back down in the dark?” Carver said irritably. “Wonderful.”

“Isn’t that better than getting eaten by something unpleasant?” asked Hawke.

“Not if we end up at the bottom of a cliff we don’t see,” Carver said.

“Look sharp!” Varric said suddenly. “Undead!”

Hawke darted forward with Carver on his heels. The other elf produced a bow and began firing arrows along with Varric. Anders adopted the same tactics he had before wondering just when Hawke had met the legendary witch of the wilds. With Merrill and the other elf the enemy fell quickly. As Hawke waited for them to catch up he turned to the other elf and said, “You’re a pretty good shot. What was your name?”

“Mahariel,” he said gruffly. “Let’s go.”

Merrill smiled up at Hawke as she hurried past him. Anders waited beside Hawke and watched the two speaking quietly together. Again his eyes were drawn to the soft curve of her belly. It was more noticeable now that she was standing in profile. She was definitely pregnant. He wasn’t sure why it fascinated him. There were some pregnant women among the refugees but they hadn’t affected him like she was. Hawke cleared his throat and Anders turned to look at him.

There was a smirk and a twinkle in his eye as he said very softly, “Are you jealous, little rabbit?”

Anders watched him walk further up the path without waiting for an answer. It was just as well, he couldn’t have answered the question anyway. Pushing the unwanted thoughts away he followed them up the trail, determined not to get caught staring again.

They found a landslide blocking the most direct route up the mountain. There was a cave nearby that Merrill said would lead them to the top. Talking became difficult as the wound their way through the cave. They were attacked by giant spiders, undead and a few abominations. When they finally exited the cave Anders gasped in amazement.

The view of the Vimmark Mountains was breathtaking. The air was clear and smelled clean, like the trees that surrounded them. Green dotted the mountains in the distance with a few of the peaks covered in snow. The beauty around them was broken only by a small sense of wrongness. Anders tore his gaze from the vista in front of him to look at the graveyard to his left.

A light mist surrounded the stones that had been piled together over elves that had passed away long ago. An arch made of rock marked the entrance and a hush fell over the group as they passed through it. Merrill led them through unmolested to a stone altar on the far side of a small clearing. Hawke followed her up to it but Mahariel stayed behind with him, Varric and Carver.

“Place the amulet on the altar and I’ll perform the rite,” Merrill said in hushed tones.

Hawke took something from his belt pouch and placed it on the stone. He then stepped back, standing next to Anders. Merrill stood at the center of the alter and waved her hand slowly over the amulet Hawke had set on it. She recited elven words in a measured cadence.

A sudden wind whipped around them when she had finished speaking and a bright light from the altar caused him to look away momentarily. When he looked back there was an old woman standing in front of the stone. Her hair was pure white and Anders shivered slightly when her golden eyes passed over him. The strange head piece she wore made it look like she had horns, the tight leather of her outfit the color of blood. The cape fluttered to stillness as the wind died.

Merrill stood off to one side, knees bent in an awkward curtsey. “Asha’bellanar,” she said respectfully.

The woman looked over at her and said, “Do you know who I am beyond that title?”

“No Asha’bellanar,” Merrill said.

“Then rise child. The people bend their knee too quickly,” the woman said turning back to Hawke. She took a few steps forward to stand in front of him. “Ah, it’s refreshing to see someone keep their word. I expected my amulet to end up in some merchant’s pocket.”

“No one wanted it,” Hawke said flatly. “Maybe because there was a witch inside of it.”

Her laughter felt out of place, full of mirth but cruel somehow. “Full of spirit,” she said. “I like that. Have you found what you were looking for?” Her gaze shifted to Anders.

Hawke glanced at him, a puzzled look briefly crossing his face before he schooled his features neutral. “Are you asking me or him?”

“Both, maybe neither,” she said cryptically. Her gaze resting on Anders she said ominously, “The answers you seek are here…but you won’t find them alone.”

“How do you know what I seek?” Anders asked suspiciously.

“I know many things,” she said turning to Hawke. “We stand upon the precipice of change. The world fears the inevitable plummet into the abyss. Watch for that moment... and when it comes, do not hesitate to leap. It is only when you fall that you learn whether you can fly.”

“Cheap advice from a dragon,” Hawke said sarcastically.

“We all have our challenges,” Flemeth said. “You have my thanks…and my sympathies.”

She turned and light flashed again. An enormous dragon appeared in her place and jumped from the edge of the mountain and in a great rush of air was gone. They stood in silence watching until the dragon was a dark spot on the horizon.

“If we never see her again it’ll be too soon,” Carver said frowning.

“Carver,” Hawke began in a serious voice. “For once we completely agree.” Anders added his silent agreement as well.

The journey down the mountain required less fighting than the trip up. Anders and Merrill led the way, her staff lit and his spell wisp floating in little circles around him. He spoke with her quietly, asking about herself and the Dalish in general. She was much friendlier than Velanna had been and answered him patiently.

Mages among the Dalish were uncommon but not quite as rare as the rest of Thedas. If a clan hadn’t produced a mage then one was sent from a clan that had. All Dalish clans were led by a mage called the Keeper and his or her bonded alpha. It is a keeper’s job to remember and pass on that knowledge but both of them protect the clan, she said. It is also the alpha’s responsibility to watch the mage closely for corruption, demons and blood magic.

Her clan originally came from Ferelden. They crossed the Waking Sea after having lost one of their clan members. His body was never found but there were darkspawn corpses at the entrance to the ruins that Mahariel followed his trail to. They fled without searching the ruins. Because of his responsibility to Merrill and their child, he didn’t want to take any chance of contracting the blight sickness.

She told of their journey across the sea sadly, her first child had gotten sick like so many others trapped in the hold of the ship they had bought passage on. His health had rapidly declined and the child died soon after they reached the Free Marches. Merrill cheered quickly as she spoke of the child she carried. It was very late when they reached the camp and Merrill offered to let them stay until morning. Exhausted from the busy day Anders had no trouble falling asleep.

Hawke kept them out of the city for two more days. He left Anders in his clinic with a promise to visit. As he stood in his empty clinic, Anders realized how quickly he’d gotten used to their presence when they were gone. Sitting at his desk he wrote some notes on what he’d learned from Merrill about the Dalish and compared it with what he knew about the rest of Thedas.

If he could learn about Tevinter he might have a clearer idea of what to look for in the Chantry. That was going to be easier said than done however. The Tevinter Imperium was a taboo subject in the circles. He’d asked people about the place where mages were rumored to rule but there were no facts to be had. Only stories, the next more wild than the last.

Anders opened the clinic and his life almost returned to normal. Hawke had promised to visit and he did every day since they had returned. There was no regularity to his visits and it was increasingly hard to ignore the disappointment he felt when Hawke didn’t come through the door. Sometimes he brought Carver or Varric with him and sometimes he was alone.

One morning about a week after they had returned to Kirkwall he came early. Anders smile quickly turned to a small frown when he saw the two others that had come with him. A dark skinned woman with gold jewelry glittering everywhere and a sour looking elf with strange tattoos. The daggers at her back marked her as a rogue and the giant sword marked him a warrior but both of them were alpha.

Since it was early there was no one in the clinic yet and Hawke leaned against his desk next to Anders. The elf stayed by the door but the woman looked around curiously. Anders smiled nervously up at him and said, “Hello Devin. You’re a little early today.”

“I thought you could use a little air,” Hawke said. “Gets a little musty down here and we’re going to the Wounded Coast hunting mercenaries. Care to join us?”

“What about…them?” Anders asked nervously.

“They’ll keep your secret,” Hawke said confidently.

“I don’t know…” he said his frown deepening.

“Trust me,” said Hawke quietly leaning down. “I won’t let you get caught.”

“Okay,” Anders said after a moment. Hawke’s smile was infectious as he pulled Anders to his feet.


	6. Chapter 6

Considering how the elf reacted, Anders was very glad Hawke waited until they were actually on the coast to tell them that he was a mage. Isabela, a pirate captain without a ship, had leered at him. Hawke told them the same lie that he had Carver and Varric and she pouted for a few minutes before resuming her leering. The fleeting jealous look that had crossed Hawke’s face was not lost on Anders.

The elf however, Fenris, had frowned upon hearing that Anders was a mage. When he was told that Anders was also possessed he had growled, began glowing and drew his sword in the space of a few seconds. He now stood behind Hawke and Isabela watching the elf warily over their shoulders.

“Out of the way Hawke,” Fenris growled.

“What’s gotten into you?” Isabela asked.

“His demon will enslave you. Move and I’ll take care of him,” said Fenris glaring at him.

“Spirit!” Anders exclaimed loudly. “Justice is not a demon.”

“You’ll do no such thing,” Hawke said harshly. “What do you mean by that anyway?”

“When he snares you,” Fenris sneered. “You can’t resist them. You’ll be bonded then turned into his slave.”

“Surely you’re joking,” Isabela said sounding amused.

“I’ve seen it dozens of times,” Fenris said darkly. “I’m from Tevinter, remember? Alphas are kept in cages, chosen for their obedience or their skills. If they displease their master then they are killed if they’re lucky. Mostly the mages let their pet demons drive the alpha crazy before they are killed so the mage can bond a different alpha.”

“Maker,” Anders whispered. “That’s horrible!”

“You don’t listen very well do you,” Hawke smirked. Fenris’ frown deepened but at least he stopped glowing. “Justice is a spirit, not a demon. And he isn’t going to bond with anyone since he isn’t omega anymore.”

“I don’t believe that,” Fenris said suspiciously.

“You just said that alpha’s can’t resist. Have you ever had the irresistible urge to go to Darktown Fenris?” asked Hawke.

“Well…no,” Fenris said hesitantly.

“Isabela?” Hawke said turning to her slightly.

“Sure haven’t,” she said smirking slightly. “Darktown’s not nearly as fun as Lowtown.”

“It could be a lie,” Fenris said persistently. “Mages will do anything to get what they want.”

“You do remember that my mother was a mage,” Hawke said mildly. There was a pleasant smile on his lips but it didn’t reach his eyes. His eyes were hard and unforgiving. Fenris straightened and finally sheathed his sword. “You will not touch him, you will not turn him in and when he is with us you will protect him. He’s a healer and I’m sure he’ll be inclined to return the favor.” His voice was still pleasant but even Anders could hear the underlying threat.

“Very well,” Fenris said in a neutral tone. “I’ll respect your wishes but I will be watching.”

He turned and started off. Isabela looked at Fenris and then Hawke with one eyebrow climbing to her hairline before she hurried after the elf. Anders stepped forward and glanced at Hawke. All the false pleasantness had disappeared, leaving only a frown and a hard stare.

“You should probably avoid him,” Hawke said quietly. “I had no idea things were so screwed up in Tevinter.”

“It’s all right,” Anders said quietly. “I…trust you.”

“Shall we go hunting then, little rabbit?” Hawke asked his teasing smile resurfacing.

Anders smiled as he nodded. Hawke took his hand and they hurried after Isabela and Fenris. The elf watched him warily all the while they were together but he followed Hawke’s demands to the letter. After seeing him fight, Anders was determined to never be alone with him. He wanted to ask Fenris about Tevinter but after watching him kill a Qunari outcast by ripping his heart out of his chest Anders decided that he’d ask Hawke to get the information, preferably without Anders being present.

Isabela also made him nervous but for an entirely different reason. When she grew bored with Fenris she turned her attention on him. She overwhelmed him with questions that were decidedly personal. They were couched in innuendo, all fishing for information. Anders was beginning to wonder if all she ever thought about was sex. He only answered a few of her questions (yes my staff works properly, no I probably can’t get anyone pregnant, no I’m not a virgin) before Hawke rescued him. Hawke pushed between them and skillfully guided the conversation to a different subject.

It was interesting watching Hawke fight with these two. Both of the rogues left Fenris to himself. Between the strange abilities he had and his skill with the giant sword he wielded anything unlucky enough to wander into his sight was soon on the ground breathing their last. Sometimes Hawke and Isabela picked the same target but more often they were near each other with a different target.

These three had obviously fought together for a while but they lacked the seamless grace Hawke and Carver had displayed. There was more healing to be done with Fenris and Isabela than there had been with Carver and Varric. After the first battle of the day was done, Isabela simply grinned and said, “Can we keep him?”

The whole day had passed before Anders gained a grudging respect from Fenris. He was still the first to leave the group upon returning to Kirkwall however. Isabela was left in Lowtown, at the Hanged Man and Hawke walked him home to his clinic. Hawke spent that night and the next two sleeping on the cot nearest the door. He didn’t ask, but Anders thought Hawke was making sure that Fenris hadn’t turned him into the Templars.

During the next few weeks Hawke still visited him at least once a day. He also took Anders with a few times when his task took him out of Kirkwall. These journeys with Hawke into the outlying areas of Kirkwall quickly became the highlight of his lonely existence. Hawke and his companions had a camaraderie that Anders had only seen before during his brief time with the Wardens.

He was accepted into the group with little fuss, the one exception being Fenris. Even Hawke’s friend in the guard, Aveline accepted him even though she would be in deep trouble if it were found out that she hadn’t turned in an apostate. She too was an alpha but she wasn’t curious like Isabela or hateful like Fenris. Anders had felt small under her intense gaze the first time they had met.

Anders was surprised to discover that her husband had been a Templar. He had died in Ferelden though, after they had encountered the Hawke family fleeing Lothering. Hawke’s father also perished in that frantic flight, saving Carver from certain death at the hands of an ogre.

Hawke had made little progress in getting information out of Fenris. He had learned that mages truly did rule there and rumors he’d heard of slavery being legal there were true. Fenris had been a slave to the mage that had put the lyrium markings on him. The elf was remarkably tight lipped about anything else. Hawke was confident he could get Fenris to talk eventually though so Anders could do nothing but wait.

The lack of progress in his mission was frustrating but Anders had to be patient. Hawke was working on a plan to get them into the Chantry again and he was hopeful that they could find something. Until then he went over his notes again and again looking for anything that might give him a clue.

It was also becoming harder for Anders to deny the attraction he felt. Growing up in the circle, mages were taught to fear alphas. That so many Templars were alphas only reinforced this fear. Hawke was nothing like he’d been taught to expect. There was possessiveness about Hawke that showed the most when they were with Fenris. The fleeting jealousy when Isabela’s gaze lingered too long, these he expected.

What confused him was the tender caring moments when it was just the two of them. The way Hawke stayed close but rarely touched him. Even his constant teasing or that Hawke never called him ‘little rabbit’ when the others could hear. Stories he told of his parents were also not what he’d been taught to expect. It seemed to Anders that Hawke’s parents had truly loved each other.

His own feelings were confusing as well. There was a need to please, to see that teasing smirk with a playful twinkle in his eyes. It was the way his heart skipped a beat when Hawke walked through the door. The jealous envy he felt when Isabela draped herself all over Hawke or sat in his lap at the Hanged man the few times Anders had gone with him there. What confused and frightened him the most however was that he actually liked the possessive behavior Hawke displayed occasionally.

It was early and the clinic was empty so far. Anders sat at his desk staring at a bottle of the heat suppressant. His thoughts were on Hawke and what might happen if he didn’t drink the potion. He looked up at the sound of the door and smiled when Hawke strolled through. Upon seeing Isabela directly behind him, Anders downed the potion quickly and tucked the empty bottle in his pouch.

“Feeling all right?” Hawke asked with a touch of concern.

“Perfect!” Anders exclaimed quickly. “Are we going somewhere?”

“Sundermount,” said Hawke. Anders was relieved to see his smile quickly return. “I’ve been asked to get a hold of ironbark and I figure the Dalish might be able to help me find some. Thought you might like to speak with that pretty little pregnant elf again.”

Anders smiled as he stood, taking his staff to follow Hawke through the door. In his excitement, he didn’t notice the suspicious frown from Carver or the intense curiosity from Isabela. There was nothing different about this trip from the many others he’d gone on. They reached the Dalish camp and he did speak with Merrill again, asking her questions and answering some that she asked him.

They spent the night on the mountain and fought through darkspawn to the ironbark the next day. It wasn’t until he was back in his clinic that he noticed the empty bottle was gone.


	7. Chapter 7

After a thorough search of his person, his pack and the clinic without finding the empty bottle, he sighed in frustration and took everything out of his pouch again. It still wasn’t there. Only slightly worried, he wondered why someone would want an empty potion bottle. He was more irritated with the fact that he would probably have to replace it and those little glass containers cost a fair bit of coin. Someone like Hawke probably wouldn’t have any trouble replacing it but his few coins were precious.

Sighing again, he replaced the things in pouch and decided to open the clinic for a while. Anders was soon caught up in his work and forgot about the missing potion bottle. Two days later found him in the Hanged Man, sitting next to Hawke with Aveline on his other side. They were trying to teach him Wicked Grace and he concentrated on trying to remember the rules. He was starting to think that maybe he was just hopeless with cards. Anders couldn’t win at Diamondback either.

“Isabela, what are you doing?” Hawke asked sounding amused.

He glanced over and frowned. Hawke’s chair had been pushed back and she sat on his lap again. She sat with her legs to one side, her upper body twisted slightly and pressed against him. One arm rested on his shoulder one finger on the other hand stroking his cheek. Anders didn’t hear her low reply but his frown deepened and he turned back to his cards.

“I think maybe you’re just trying to show me some of your hiding spots,” said Hawke still sounding amused.

Anders glanced over to see Hawke pull a card from the tight bodice of her shirt. There was light laughter around the table but he scowled down at the cards in his hand and tried to push away the envy colored jealousy that rose up. Hawke was a grown man and often did exactly what he wanted. He threw his cards onto the pile when the others did and pressed his hands together in front of him to keep from tapping the table.

Isabela murmured something else and Hawke now sounded slightly irritated. “You have a seat,” he said.

“Are you in or not?” Varric asked as he shuffled the cards.

“Oh all right,” she said. “I’m in.”

A small smile had surfaced as Isabela stood but it disappeared quickly when she walked behind him. Her finger trailed along his shoulder and he turned in his seat to watch her walk around the table to the other side. She winked at him and Anders sunk in his chair wishing he were somewhere else suddenly. Next to her, Carver was watching him intently. He avoided looking at any of them for a while.

Nothing came of the strange incident and almost a week later Anders was on the Wounded Coast with Hawke, Isabela and Carver again wishing he were in his clinic. Instead of hanging on Hawke like she normally did, she was hanging on him instead. They were sitting in an open space taking a short break for lunch. All morning she’d been closer than he was comfortable with often with an arm slung across his shoulder. She touched him lightly all over while she spoke. He’d tried every polite way he could think of to get her to keep her distance but she always moved closer after a while.

She was now sitting so close their hips touched. It wasn’t that he minded the touching really. Mages in the circle often stayed close enough to one another that someone was always touching someone else. There was normally nothing behind it, just one group of people sticking together to avoid another group. What the pirate probably wanted he wasn’t willing to give…not to her at least. Anders scooted closer to Hawke on his other side trying not to listen to her chatter. Isabela leaned on him and he scooted closer to Hawke again. Their hips now touched and Hawke made an irritated noise.

“What are you two up to?” Hawke asked in irritation. “Carver’s been watching me all morning and you haven’t listened to anything Anders has said.”

“Why would we be up to something?” Isabela said innocently as she stood. “Are we ready to go find more horn heads?”

“Don’t change the subject,” said Hawke frowning. “It’s not like you to cling when someone tells you very clearly to back off.”

“Careful Brother,” Carver said standing as well. “Someone might think you’re jealous.”

Hawke frowned as they walked off together. Anders thought that he probably was jealous but tried his best not to show it. Officially, there was nothing between them but the attraction between them should have been obvious to anyone. Even Anders couldn’t deny that anymore. He too wondered what she might be up to. Standing he turned and offered Hawke a hand up, smiling and shrugging.

For the rest of the day, when they weren’t fighting, Anders stayed close to Hawke but Isabela kept her distance. She turned her attention to Carver and he felt very relieved. Hawke was thoughtful and quiet when he walked Anders home that night.

The next week, Anders spent mostly in his clinic. Hawke still visited at least once a day. Spending most of his time healing the refugees, his spare time was spent going over his notes. Fenris still wasn’t talking but he’d learned more from Merrill about the Dalish. There were mages born every generation, most born to omegas bonded with an alpha. Their harsh life took quite a few of them early however.

Anders wondered if there was a connection but the only pair he knew of outside the Dalish was Hawke’s parents. They had produced a mage but neither of his parents had been a mage. Without knowing more examples he couldn’t draw a proper conclusion. His best hope was to search for records of the children born to mages in the Gallows. He had spoken to Hawke during one of his visits of this possible connection. The rogue looked intrigued and promised to get them into the Chantry soon.

It was now three days before he would need to drink another heat suppressant. Hawke had stopped by early the previous day and said that they would be sneaking into the Chantry tonight. Anders spent the day brewing more of the potion. He put the four new bottles in his cabinet behind the one that was there just before Hawke strolled through his door.

“Are you ready?” Hawke asked as Anders shut the cabinet.

“Yes,” he said nervously.

“Stay close and keep quiet,” said Hawke soothingly.

Anders nodded and they left the clinic. After locking the door he followed Hawke closely to the stairs that would take them to the Chantry courtyard. Both of them were quiet as they made their way through Darktown and Lowtown. As they crossed the courtyard Anders remembered the last time the two of them were in this alley. His life had definitely changed for the better that night.

Without Hawke, Anders wouldn’t know what he did of the Dalish and would still have no idea what he was looking for. He didn’t regret carrying Hawke home that night. Anders didn’t realize how lonely he’d become since fleeing Vigil’s Keep until Hawke had shown him.

Like he had nearly two months ago, Hawke bent to pick the lock on the door. He looked over his shoulder and winked as he pushed the door open. Anders followed after him with a smile. Hawke led them through the maze of corridors, past the library entrance.

“We were looking for the same thing last time,” Hawke said quietly as they came to another door. He picked the lock and they were in an office. There were two cabinets sitting against the far wall, a desk in the middle with two chairs sitting in front of it. “Check those cabinets but be quick. I’ll stay here and keep watch at the door so we aren’t surprised like I was last time.”

Summoning a spell wisp, Anders hurried to the first cabinet. He skimmed through journals and piles of paper. In the second cabinet he found a ledger full of names. Anders looked through the names carefully until he found the one he was looking for, Karl Thekla and the name just under his was Bethany Hawke.

Suddenly there was a hand covering his mouth and an arm around him, pinning his arms to his side. Before Anders could even think of struggling, he heard Hawke speaking softly in his ear. “Put the light out. It’s time to run little rabbit.”

Hawke was gone as quickly as he’d appeared. Anders banished the spell wisp immediately clutching the journal to his chest as he closed the cabinets. When he turned Hawke was crouched at the door and he hurried over as silently as he could, ignoring his shaking legs from the fright Hawke had given him. The rogue turned and placed a finger to his lips as Anders crouched behind him.

Anders nodded and after a moment Hawke opened the door a crack. Minutes passed until Hawke opened the door fully and stepped out into the corridor, gesturing for him to follow. He closed the door carefully and followed Hawke back through the hallways, holding tightly to the journal. They didn’t meet a single person on the way out and Hawke paused for a moment to lock the door they had just come from.

They moved silently out of the alley and across the empty courtyard. Down the stairs to Lowtown and down more stairs to Darktown before Hawke finally turned to him. “Found something good I hope,” he said with a grin.

“I didn’t have much time to look but there are names at the beginning,” said Anders excitedly. “One of them was Karl Thekla, my friend that was transferred. Your sister’s name was under his.”

“Fantastic!” Hawke exclaimed. He stopped abruptly halfway up the stairs leading up to his clinic.

Anders still slightly behind him nearly ran into him. “Is something wrong?” he asked curiously.

“Didn’t you lock up the clinic?” Hawke asked quietly.

“Yes,” Anders whispered peering around him. The door was cracked open slightly.

“Stay here,” he said drawing his daggers.

The commanding tone was very clear and Anders stayed where he stood while Hawke closed the distance to the door quickly. He watched, holding the journal tightly as Hawke disappeared inside. Anders waited and he began to worry. There was no sound and very little light. It was hard to tell how long he stood there but it was long enough that he wondered how much trouble he’d be in if he followed anyway.

Worry edged him up the stairs slightly when Hawke finally appeared in the doorway. He motioned Anders forward. As he got closer the grim but amused look on Hawke’s face became clearer. “It seems that while we sneaking into the Chantry someone else snuck into your clinic. There’s no one here now though,” said Hawke as he moved to let Anders in.

His worry slightly eased upon seeing Hawke unhurt and died entirely upon seeing his potion cabinet completely empty. Feeling only numb he lit a few more of the lanterns and walked forward on wooden legs with Hawke following closely. Every one of the potions that had been there an hour ago was gone. “Oh, Dear Maker,” Anders whispered quietly.

“Anders?” Hawke asked quietly from directly behind him. “Is anything else gone?”

“Doesn’t matter,” he said turning around to face Hawke. “Probably two days now, not enough time…”

“What are you talking about?” Hawke asked. His voice was gentle with a small frown and concern shining in his dark eyes.

“It would take too long to gather more ingredients. A full day to make…too long,” Anders said quietly. He moved to sit on the nearest cot still holding the journal to his chest. “Did you know that most mages who escape from the circle are caught when they go into heat?” His voice turned bitter. “It’s a little hard to hide when you’re putting out something that says ‘fuck me’ to every alpha in the area.”

Hawke sat quietly next to him. “How have you hid for so long then?”

“I’m a healer. I know how to make the heat suppressant that every circle mage is given. But there’s not enough time…perhaps if I’d waited…”

“Bloody flames,” Hawke muttered leaning forward to rest his forearms on his knees.

“It’s too late,” said Anders starting to feel the fear creeping in. “I’ll be in heat and I’ll be caught.”

“You’re not going to get caught little rabbit,” Hawke said sitting up and twisting slightly towards him.

“Devin…would you stay with me?” Anders asked hesitantly. He had been considering asking Hawke about this possibility but hadn’t worked himself up to it yet. Hawke’s parents seemed happy and Merrill had told him that there was nothing to be frightened of. The choice had been taken out of his hands and he was frightened anyway.

“Of course,” Hawke said quietly pulling Anders into his arms. Anders, with his head resting on Hawke’s shoulder, accepted the comfort he offered silently.


	8. Chapter 8

“Devin,” Anders said softly after a while. “I’ve never…gone through this before.”

“What?” he said in shock.

“Many of us haven’t,” Anders said sitting up to look at him. “Because our magic almost always manifests before we mature, some spend their entire life without going into heat once.”

“That…can’t be healthy,” Hawke said frowning deeply after a moment. “What do you know?”

“I know a lot,” said Anders. He shrugged as he continued. “My magical talents have always been healing and I was taught about things that most mages aren’t…but I’ve never been through it.”

“Don’t worry little rabbit,” Hawke said brushing the back of his hand softly down Anders’ cheek. “There’s nothing to be frightened of. You’re sure you have a couple of days?”

“Fairly sure,” Anders said.

“All right, I’ll be back soon,” said Hawke standing. “I’m going to bring a few things we might need. I want you to stay here. Lock the door when I leave and put out all but one lantern. I want it to look like there’s no one here.”

“What’s going to happen when you get back?” Anders asked nervously.

“We’re going to lock ourselves in. Try to get some sleep,” Hawke said standing. “You’re going need it.”

Anders followed him to the door and locked it when he left. The next thing he did was put the journal in his desk with his other notes then he ended up circling his clinic. He was too nervous to sit still and too worried to sleep. If he was being honest with himself there was also a tiny bit of excitement. When Hawke returned it was with a pack full of food. Simple things like fruit, bread and cheese. He also insisted that they sleep but it took Anders a long time to fall into a fitful doze.

Part of the next day was spent pushing the heavier objects in the clinic against the doors. Hawke hadn’t been joking about locking them in and it only made Anders more nervous. They spent the rest of the day amusing themselves with a deck of cards Hawke had brought. The more of the day that passed the more nervous Anders became. His sleep was broken and filled with strange dreams.

He was now awake, having given up on trying to sleep he sat on his cot watching Hawke sleep. His clothes had been abandoned shortly after waking for the last time when he felt it. A need the man sleeping at the other end of his clinic could fulfill. Anders wanted to wake him but his nervous fright kept him seated on his cot. So he watched and he waited for Hawke to wake or the need to drive him over to the sleeping rogue.

How long he sat there, occasionally stroking his semi-hard member, he didn’t know. Anders didn’t think it was very long but time had ceased to have meaning. There was only Hawke and his need to be filled. He watched Hawke sit up and stretch while he yawned. Hawke shook his head and looked over at him. The dim light and distance prevented him from seeing much more than a silhouette as he stood. Anders wanted to turn and present his weeping hole but he stayed seated. When Hawke towered over him, Anders could see that his pupils were blown wide.

“I…” Anders said.

Hawke put a finger on his lips, silencing him before he could say anymore. “Shh,” Hawke said leaning down. “Don’t be frightened little rabbit.” He leaned down more and placed a gentle kiss on his lips before pushing him to lie flat on the cot. Anders went willingly but tugged on the pant leg he could reach.

“Devin,” he whimpered.

The teasing smile was at odds with the feral glint in his eyes but the pants were quickly removed. Kneeling on the cot, Hawke took a hold of his ankles and pushed until Anders was almost folded in half, his knees bent close to his chest, bottom raised slightly off of the cot.

“Hold yourself open for me,” Hawke said his voice low and hoarse.

Anders held his legs behind his knees and watched Hawke between them, his nervousness showing in the way his arms shook slightly. His gaze flickered between Hawke’s face and his erect cock. Anders hadn’t lied when he’d told Isabela he wasn’t a virgin. The Templars generally didn’t care if the mages in their charge fooled around with each other. Omegas couldn’t impregnate anyone and there wasn’t much else for them to do besides read. He’d never had anyone quite that big and never anyone that had a knot inside of him. Despite the fear of pain he wanted all of it…needed it.

He felt hands on the back of his thighs rubbing, soothing and Anders closed his eyes. Gasping when he felt a finger circling and pushed in his entrance, he then whimpered. He was impatient, Anders rocking onto Hawke’s finger before it was comfortable. Hawke patiently added another finger, stretching him more before Anders felt his cock nudging his entrance.

“Look at me,” Hawke commanded.

His eyes snapped open and he watched Hawke, only a thin ring of dark brown surrounding his pupils. Hawke was smiling, that smirk Anders loved seeing as he pushed his cock inside. There was a burning but it was ignored because there was more pleasure than pain. Hawke paused with his knot resting against Anders.

Groaning as Hawke began thrusting shallowly, feeling his hands at his hips. It felt amazing, but it wasn’t enough. Anders trembled with need but Hawke stopped short with every shallow thrust. “Devin,” Anders whined softly. “Please I need it.”

“Patience, little rabbit,” Hawke said confidently. “You’ll have it.”

Anders nodded but felt as if he might go mad as the need grew. The grip on his hips grew tighter after a few more thrusts. Finally Hawke kept pushing forward and the burning returned as he felt the thickest part of his knot pass through his entrance. Hawke paused again when Anders could feel his balls resting against his arse. He felt Hawke’s hands just under his own, spreading his legs a little wider before he began thrusting again, fast and hard. Anders moaned as the knot rubbed against that sweet spot with every thrust. Lost in a haze of pleasure, Anders cried out loudly when Hawke wrapped his fingers around his cock. That brief touch was enough to send him over the edge and he wailed again. He heard Hawke grunt and he thrust hard a few more times before he stopped, emptying himself inside of Anders.

He was vaguely aware of his legs being lowered as a sleepy, sated, lethargy stole over him. Hawke carefully leaned over him brushing his loose hair off his forehead, his smile wide and his pupils still large. Anders knew it would be a while before they could separate and he knew there would be much more. This was why apostates were caught when they went into heat. The need was all he knew, there was no fright, no nervous energy, no worry even…Hawke had promised to keep him safe. Anders smiled as he closed his eyes.

Anders knew time passed from the little light that filtered in from the high windows of his clinic but paid little attention to it. His need grew and diminished again when Hawke filled him. He drank when Hawke gave him water, ate when he was given food but he was the most lucid when they were connected and the brief time before the need grew again. They mostly slept during this respite.

Again and again Hawke filled him with his seed. Anders remembered a bath at some point but thought he could use another. That would happen later though. He was currently on his side, one of his legs raised slightly as Hawke drove into him. The sounds of flesh slapping against flesh was drowned by Anders’ moans and his shout as he came. The only sound Hawke made was a grunt before he emptied himself once more into Anders.

Panting as they shifted slightly to lie spooned against each other, paying close attention to where they were still connected. Anders was sated, sleepy and entirely without the need that had gripped him for what had to be days now. He pressed a hand to his stomach as a new worry descended on him.

“Devin,” Anders said quietly. “What happens now?”

“For now we rest,” said Hawke. “We’ll clean up when we wake and then we’ll go to the Hanged Man. You’re going to stay with me now.”

“Stay?” asked Anders. “As in live with you?”

“You’re certainly not going to stay here by yourself anymore,” Hawke said in that teasing tone. Anders felt his hand covering the one he had pressed to his abdomen and his voice turned serious as he said, “You’re mine now…can’t you feel it?”

Anders turned his attention inward and he could feel it. Something that hadn’t been there before, it was indescribable and wonderful…the bond. Merrill hadn’t been able to describe it to him and now he knew why. They were connected. Hawke belonged to him as much as he belonged to Hawke and it was comforting.

“Yes,” he whispered. “I can feel it.” After a moment he said in a frightened whisper, “What if I’m pregnant?”

“Unless something’s made you completely sterile you probably are,” said Hawke softly. “My father told me that the first coupling almost always results in a baby.”

“They’ll all know,” Anders said, more frightened than he’d ever been. “Only omega males can bear children.”

“Don’t worry my little rabbit,” Hawke said soothingly as he laced their fingers together. “I’ll take care of you…both of you.”

As tired as he was, Anders found it hard to sleep. His mind raced, thinking mostly about what his future might hold. Not only was he in danger, Hawke was in more danger. If Anders was discovered by the Templars now Hawke would be killed to break the bond before he was thrown in the Gallows. The possibility of him now carrying a child made that almost unavoidable.

It was no comfort that he might not be pregnant at all. Non-mage Wardens almost never had children. There were so few Wardens in Ferelden however, that no one knew how an omega would be affected. As frightening as the thought of being pregnant was, he found this bothered him more. Either way Anders could do nothing about it.

Eventually exhaustion overcame him. He fell asleep still on his side with Hawke buried deep inside him. His last thought was hopeful. Hawke’s mother had never been in a circle. If anyone could keep him out of the Gallows now…it was Devin.


	9. Chapter 9

Anders figured it was midday when he woke. Devin was already awake, bathed and dressed. After he’d bathed and dressed in clean clothes they put the clinic to rights. He gathered the things that he wanted to keep with him, including the journal and his notes, while Devin waited for him at the door. With his pack slung over his shoulder he hesitated just out of Devin’s reach.

“Why can’t I open the clinic?” he asked.

Devin took a small step towards him and put a hand on his shoulder. “I know how important helping these people is to you but until we know who broke in I don’t want you down here alone. It’s just too dangerous,” he explained patiently.

It made sense. His reasons usually did but Anders just didn’t want to go up to Lowtown. Besides the Templars that wandered everywhere, the others were up there. He and Devin had disappeared for nearly a week. There would be questions…and Anders didn’t know how to answer them.

He followed Devin out the door and turned to lock it. When he turned back around Devin had only taken a few steps away. Anders could feel tension in the air as he watched the Hawke brothers stare at one another. Devin was wary but Carver looked nervous and relieved.

“Thank the Maker,” Carver muttered. His voice rose as he said, “I was hoping you were in there with him.”

“How long have you been out here Carver?” Devin asked.

“Almost three days now,” Carver said tiredly.

“Three days!” exclaimed Anders in shock. “Why?”

“You’ve been gone for six,” said Carver sounding annoyed. “This was the only place I could think of where Devin might be. I was going to knock but I heard the sounds you were making and decided to wait at the bottom of the steps.”

Anders blushed and wished he could hide somewhere.

“Carver I’m touched,” Devin teased. His smirk had replaced the wary look. “I didn’t think you cared.”

“Of course I care,” Carver said sullenly. “You’re the only family I have left. Am I going to have to listen to that at home?”

“Probably not for a while,” Devin said smirking.

“Devin,” Anders groaned. “Could we not talk about this? It’s…embarrassing.”

Devin turned to Anders and said, “Well you could learn to be quieter…but I sort of liked all the noises you were making.”

“Oh Maker,” Carver muttered shaking his head. “Could you two have this discussion later? Perhaps when I’m not around.”

“But then I couldn’t see that lovely shade of red your face is right now,” Devin said his smirk growing. “Besides, you’re the one who brought it up.”

“I’m going home now,” Carver said scowling as he turned and started off.

“Carver,” Devin said suddenly serious. “Why haven’t you asked?”

“I’m not stupid Brother,” Carver said stopping. “I did look other places first but I’ve seen the looks you two give each other.” He finally turned to face them. “It wasn’t hard to figure out.” Carver shuffled his feet nervously and asked shyly, “Am I going to be an Uncle?”

“It’s a little early to know that Carver,” Devin said quietly.

He nodded before turning and starting off again. “Good luck with Fenris,” Carver called over his shoulder.

At the mention of the broody elf Anders felt his stomach drop to his shoes. After the incident when they had first met, Devin hadn’t taken both of them on very many of his odd jobs. Anders was sure it was Devin who kept Fenris from hurting him. Whether it was the possessive behavior or the veiled threat he didn’t know and didn’t really care. The elf made him nervous on good days and frightened him on bad ones. He wasn’t going to be very happy at all that he’d been lied to.

“Come on,” Devin said turning to him.

Anders followed him unhappily through Darktown and into Lowtown. It didn’t take long for them to reach the Hanged Man. He didn’t ask why they were going to the tavern though he was pretty sure Devin didn’t live there like Isabela and Varric.

Isabela was by the bar and when she saw them she downed her drink quickly and followed after them. Devin went straight up the stairs and into Varric’s private suite. The dwarf was sitting at his large table going through papers when they entered. His sharp eyes bypassed Devin and Isabela and locked on him for a long moment, taking in his presence and the pack before moving back to Devin.

“It’s been a while Hawke,” Varric said cheerfully. “Glad to see you’re okay. Is Blondie going somewhere?”

“He’s moving in with Carver and me,” Devin said pulling out a chair to sit. “There are a couple of things I’d like to talk to you about.”

Anders hung his pack on the back of a chair and sat as well noticing that Isabela sat directly across from him. He frowned as Isabela grinned broadly. She leaned forward looking at Devin as she asked, “You’ve been together this whole time?”

“Why would you think that Isabela?” Devin asked casually. His eyes were locked on her though and they were hard.

“You come in together,” she replied just as casually. “After six days suddenly Anders is moving in, he’s a mage and you’ve both wanted each other for a while. Besides all that you’re both positively glowing.”

“It was you!” Anders exclaimed in shock. “You’re the one who broke in!” Her behavior suddenly made sense as he remembered the missing potion bottle. She had taken it and somehow found out what had been in it. After that it was a waiting game, heats were predictable and with his just around the corner their second trip to the Chantry was a perfect opportunity. “Don’t you realize what you’ve done?” he asked angrily. “Why?”

“Because watching you two dance around each other was getting pathetic,” she replied with a smirk. “I still have all your potions if you want them back.”

“You’ve put both of us in grave danger!” Anders hissed angrily clenching his hands into fists on top of the table.

Devin placed his hand on Anders’ arm. “Your interference was unnecessary,” he said quietly. “Did you think at all about what could have happened? What would have happened if I hadn’t been with him?”

“If I thought you wouldn’t have stayed with him I wouldn’t have done it Hawke,” she said her voice turning serious. “I had plenty of time to plan. It would have taken you two forever to get there on your own.”

The room fell quiet. Anders was furious with her. He’d had enough of people controlling his life in the circle. Ignoring the fact that they’d wanted this, she had taken the choice away from them. Devin squeezed his arm lightly and leaned close to whisper in his ear, “Stay calm.” He forced himself to lay his palms on the table and took a deep breath.

“So he really is an omega?” Varric asked. Anders could detect nothing but simple curiosity.

“Yes,” Devin said calmly. “Isabela stole whatever he was using to control his heat cycles.”

“Anyone want a drink?” Varric asked calmly. “I know I could use one.”

“As long as you’re buying,” Devin said smiling.

“I’ll be right back,” Varric said also smiling.

The room stayed quiet as Varric left. Devin and Isabela seemed to be having a staring contest as Anders worked to calm himself. He didn’t understand why Devin didn’t say or do anything. Anders knew he had to be irritated at least. He was in just as much or more danger than Anders was now and he probably knew that.

It didn’t take long for Varric to return with three mugs of ale and one full of steaming tea. Isabela quirked an eyebrow as the tea was set in front of Anders. Understanding dawned on him the moment Devin’s smirk grew wide. Anders never drank much alcohol but he usually had one glass when he was here with everyone else. It wasn’t wise for a mage to lose control of their tongue and his tolerance for the stuff was extremely small. It was also well known that pregnant people shouldn’t drink alcohol because it could harm the baby.

“Thank you Varric,” Anders said smiling.

“No problem Blondie,” Varric said before taking a swig of his ale.

Isabela frowned in thought. After a moment she groaned and said, “Balls. I didn’t think of that.”

“Now you see our problem,” Devin said quietly.

“You can’t be sure,” she said. “It’s entirely too soon to know…that.”

Devin leaned forward, his voice still quiet but deadly serious. “It _is_ too soon to know one way or the other right now. It’s much safer, for both of us, to assume that he is. However noble your intentions, you’ve put both Anders and I in serious danger. Because this is partly your fault, you’re going to help me.”

“You have a plan?” Varric asked curiously.

“Don’t I always,” Devin said smugly. “Is your brother still trying to get to the Deep Roads?”

“Yes. He’s not having much luck though,” Varric shrugged. “Why?”

“I have the coin to fund your expedition,” Devin said. “I want a full share of the spoils.”

“Devin no,” Anders said shaking his head. “The Deep Roads are dangerous. I’ve been there.”

“Coin and status little rabbit,” Devin said turning to him. “It worked for Grandfather Amell and it will work for us until we can run. I’m not leaving Kirkwall without my sister.”


	10. Chapter 10

“What an adorable pet name,” Isabela said with a smirk.

Anders scowled at her and gripped his mug tightly before taking a sip. “Isn’t there some other way?” he asked Devin.

“Probably,” Devin said. “Anything else I’ve thought of would take too long though.”

Isabela took a drink of her ale and turned a serious look on Devin. “What do you need from me?” she asked.

“Hope you didn’t have anything planned for the next few weeks,” Devin said smiling. “The first thing you’re going to do is help Carver and I clear out the old Amell estate. Then you’re coming with us to the Deep Roads to help me keep the nasties down there away from Anders.”

“Fun,” she muttered before draining the last of her ale.

“I’m going with you?” Anders asked in surprise.

“Of course, you’re a Grey Warden,” Devin explained patiently. “You point them out, Isabela, Carver and I kill them. Varric stays close to you and Bianca takes care of anything that gets past the three of us while you keep all of us healthy.”

“How long have you been thinking of this?” Anders asked in awe. His plan seemed flawless but there were still many things that could go wrong.

“This morning, while I watched you sleep,” Devin said.

“We still have time to go talk to Bartrand in the Merchant’s Guild,” Varric said. “We’ll need to get a hold of some maps for the Deep Roads too.”

“Bartrand first,” said Devin briskly as he stood. “I’ll be by bright and early to collect you Isabela, so be ready.”

Isabela sighed as she also stood. “See you then,” she said waving over her shoulder as she walked out.

Anders and Varric also stood and Devin turned to Anders as he took his pack from the back of the chair. “Would you like to go home or back to the clinic for a little while?” Devin asked running a finger lightly down his cheek.

Leaning into the caress slightly, Anders replied softly, “Home.”

“This way,” Devin said smiling as he turned toward the door.

He followed Devin out of the tavern and took careful note of where he was being led. The place Devin shared with Carver was little more than a hovel close to the alienage. Another hovel pointed out to him in the same little square belonged to his Uncle Gamlen. The main room was neat but it was clear that two men lived here. The few pieces of furniture were simple and functional. There was no decoration of any sort and the pantry held things that either didn’t need to be cooked or could be cooked quickly. A door at the back of the main room led to Carver’s room and a door to the left led to Devin’s room.

Devin left with a promise to be back before nightfall. Anders locked the door after they had gone and looked over his new surroundings again. Too much had happened and he felt a little overwhelmed. In a short four day span that he only half remembered he’d been bonded to an alpha, was more than likely pregnant with his child, uprooted from his familiar clinic and had a trek into one of the most dangerous places on Thedas to look forward to.

“I need to stay away from the Chantry,” he whispered.

Rather than let Carver catch him standing next to the door like a lost child, he ventured into Devin’s room. A bed, a desk and chair and a simple wardrobe were the only furnishings in the small room. Like the outer room, it was neat and clear of decoration. The fireplace was cold but the room was still warm from the heat of the day.

He walked to the desk and looked at the things on top. The only thing he recognized was a whetstone but there were many other things that he didn’t recognize. Anders leaned his staff against the wall and turned to sit on the bed, holding his pack on his lap. Originally he had planned to start going through the journal but as he yawned he realized he was still very tired. Leaning over until his head landed on the pillow, he brought his feet up onto the bed. Still holding his pack, he closed his eyes and was asleep in moments.

“Wake up little rabbit.” Gentle shaking along with Devin’s familiar voice eventually woke him enough to open his eyes. Devin smiled as Anders blinked. “You could have taken your boots off at least.”

“I’m sorry,” Anders said sleepily. “I was just so tired suddenly.” Anders sat up and Devin took his pack, setting it next to the bed.

“Come and eat,” Devin said as he stood. “Then we can get you settled in.”

Dinner was simple and quiet. Carver retired to his room immediately, leaving him and Devin to wash what little dishes there were. After the dishes were drying in the rack they also retired to Devin’s room, now theirs. His clothes were added to the wardrobe and part of the desk cleared off for the few things he brought with.

Now dressed in their nightclothes, they lay under the covers. To Anders it felt odd to be sharing a bed with another person but good at the same time. He lay on his side, head resting over Devin’s heart, arm draped across his stomach. Devin was tracing patterns on his arm with one hand and the other resting on his shoulder.

“When are we leaving for the Deep Roads?” Anders asked softly.

“It depends on how quickly we can get a hold of some maps,” said Devin.

“Is there any way you can delay it about a month?” Anders asked nervously. “We should know one way or the other by then.”

“I suppose so,” he said quietly. “Probably better that way, can’t have you going into heat down there.”

“Devin,” said Anders after a moment. “How did your sister get caught?”

His fingers never paused in drawing patterns on Anders’ arm as he replied. “At a harvest festival. The whole village was there. One of the other boys in the village snuck up on her. She set his hair on fire. Her magic manifested in front of everyone…farmers, shopkeepers…Mother Elizabeth. Father couldn’t do anything. He had to keep Mother calm. If Mother had been discovered too he would have been killed and Carver and I would have become wards of the Chantry.”

“That’s horrible,” Anders whispered.

Devin’s arm tightened around him for a second. “How did you get caught?” asked Devin curiously.

“I was twelve. My father locked me in the cellar. I’m not sure why I was taken to the Ferelden circle instead of one in the Anderfels.”

“So that’s how you got your nick name,” Devin said. Anders couldn’t see his smile but he knew it was there.

“No one could say it properly,” said Anders smiling as well. “At the time I was the only Anders in the tower so…”

“Are you ready to tell me yet?” Devin asked.

Anders rose, resting on an elbow, and saw that teasing smirk. He grinned as he leaned close to Devin’s ear and whispered his name. Devin’s smile turned into a tiny frown and Anders chuckled as he settled himself in their previous position. “I told you it was unpronounceable,” he said.

“We’re definitely not naming a child after you,” Devin said seriously. “That’s quite a mouthful.”

“Good night Devin,” said Anders, still smiling.

“Sleep well little rabbit,” Devin said softly, kissing the top of his head.

He fell asleep listening to Devin’s heartbeat and wrapped in his comforting embrace. It felt good, not at all like what he’d been taught. Despite the added danger he felt safe.

It took Devin and Varric a week to find maps of the Deep Roads. A group of Wardens had passed through Kirkwall not long ago. During their time in the city their room at the Inn they were staying at had been broken into and some of their things taken. After the Wardens had moved on there was a raid by the guard on a known Coterie hideout. Among the things found were the Wardens possessions, including a map of the Deep Roads in the area. It took Devin another week to get Aveline to let him have the maps.

During this time Anders’ life changed very little. He left every morning and opened his clinic, closing it again and heading back to Lowtown just before dusk. Breakfast and dinner were eaten there with Devin and Carver, lunch in the clinic when he had a spare moment. Devin still stopped by at least once a day. When he was asked why the clinic had been closed for a week he told them it was an extended mission with Devin, hoping none of them had gotten close enough to hear what was really going on.

By the time Anders saw them again both Aveline and Fenris had been told what had really happened during that week. Strangely, Aveline seemed to be the angriest with Isabela. Anders couldn’t see any change in her attitude towards him which was a mixed blessing. She was fiercely loyal to Devin but she had always seemed cool and distant towards Anders.

Fenris had been livid. Neither Devin nor Carver would tell him exactly what had happened but from the look they exchanged it hadn’t been good at all. Any progress Devin had made with the elf on finding out what really happened beyond Tevinter’s borders had been crushed. Anders would have to be patient while Devin tried to repair the fractured friendship he had with Fenris. The few times he’d been around Fenris, the elf had glared at him the whole time. It had only strengthened his resolve never to be alone with him.

The journal he’d taken from the Chantry went with him where ever he went. In his spare time he began reading through its contents carefully. The first few pages listed the names of all the mages currently in the Gallows. The next section contained a list of mages that had been transferred into the Gallows from elsewhere and why.

Anders was still working on this section. Apparently problem mages from other circles were sent to the Kirkwall circle. Not all of the transfers were problem mages though, like Bethany and Karl. They had been sent to Kirkwall because their talents were needed. The other reasons he had read so far were simple things like being caught repeatedly sneaking food from the kitchens to more serious ones like escape attempts. The Knight-Commander here had a reputation for being a hard woman. He was suddenly glad for his valuable status as a Spirit Healer.

Being a mage was rare but being a Spirit Healer was like lightening striking the exact same spot twice. Spirit Healers were exceedingly rare among mages and the circles that had one guarded them fanatically. It had made escaping the tower difficult but each time he’d been caught his punishment had been no more than a slap on the wrist and he was sent back to the infirmary, often with a Templar escort for months.

Even though he’d been living with Devin and Carver for two weeks, Anders still had trouble thinking of it as home. He spent most of his time there in the room he shared with Devin, not because he couldn’t get along with Carver, but because he was more comfortable. There were his familiar things and little reminders of Devin all over the room that made this unfamiliar hovel bearable.

During these two weeks Anders paid close attention to himself, looking for any small sign. It was still too early to know if he now carried a child. Devin had only been able to stall the expedition another week however. They would likely find out one way or the other while they were in the Deep Roads. He found himself hoping that he was. Not only for the safety issues going into heat presented but he truly wanted a child. Anders finally had an answer for the question Devin had asked him so long ago on Sundermount. He _was_ jealous of Merrill.


	11. Chapter 11

The dwarven thaig they were looking for was supposedly a week from the surface. It had taken two days of travel to reach the Deep Roads entrance and over a week to find the thaig because of the blocked tunnel. Anders would have gone into heat days ago. Since he hadn’t, he knew their child grew inside of him. He also noticed a few other signs that only further confirmed what he knew. There weren’t very many chances to speak with Devin about it either. Mostly when they went to sleep together but Anders was either tired or one of them on watch. He suspected Devin already knew though.

It was easy to contain his excitement, however. Their surroundings didn’t lend well to happy occasions. Anders wasn’t very happy to be down here at all. He’d forgotten how much he hated the feel of the darkspawn. Their presence somehow greasy as they twisted into his mind through the taint they shared. This thought had given him another worry. What if the baby was born tainted like he already was? Unfortunately there was no one to ask and he didn’t want to speak to Devin about it either. It was bad enough that he would worry about it until the baby was born.

The darkspawn had mysteriously disappeared the closer they came to this strange thaig, it was nothing like Kal’Hirol, which only worried him. Anything strong enough that even darkspawn avoided was nothing to be messing with. These worries he had voiced. Devin was confident they could handle whatever it was also stating that there was no reason they couldn’t avoid it as well.

Anders longed to see the sun again but followed Devin and Varric in front of him with Carver and Isabela flanking him. He would have settled for going back to a more familiar part of the Deep Roads. This place felt wrong. The further in they went the worse this feeling became and the more nervous he was.

Climbing a set of stairs, there was an altar at the top. On this altar sat a statue or an idol, of what he couldn’t say, but he didn’t like it. It was made of lyrium, but the colors were wrong. Lyrium was normally a blue color but this thing was mostly red. Most of the wrongness he felt was coming from the idol. He felt an intense wave of dislike and Devin turned a puzzled look on him.

“Anders?” he said curiously.

“It’s evil,” Anders said taking a step away. “You should destroy it.”

Everyone except Devin gave him a skeptical look. Varric picked the thing up carefully and looked it over, tossing it to Bartrand who had come in shortly after they had. “An idol made of pure lyrium,” Varric said. “It ought to be worth a fortune.”

Bartrand caught the thing and turned. Anders felt better after Bartrand walked out the door with it but that was short lived as it slammed shut. He sat at the top of the steps and watched the others banging and yelling on the door but it did no good. They were trapped…betrayed.

Devin sat heavily next to him. “Are you all right?” he asked.

Anders snorted. “Trapped in the Deep Roads and pregnant…”

“We have plenty of supplies,” said Devin soothingly. “We can find another way out.”

“It won’t be any better out there in a few months,” Anders said miserably. “Not when I start showing. I won’t even be able to hide in my clinic.”

“First things first, little rabbit,” Devin said putting his arm around Anders’ shoulders. “Maybe we’ll find something on the way. You let me worry about the Templars.”

“I’m always worried about Templars,” Anders said leaning on him slightly. “It’s not just Templars a mage has to worry about though.”

“All right,” said Devin his teasing smile broad. “You take care of the Templars and I’ll take care of everyone else.” Anders wasn’t sure what to say so he said nothing, wrapping his arms around the rogue instead. Taking comfort in the safe feeling Devin always gave him. “How long until you start showing?” Devin asked quietly.

“Three or four months,” said Anders his voice muffled from the leathers his face was pressed against.

There were footsteps behind them and Carver said, “We found a door on the other side of the room. We’re ready to go.”

“Thank you Carver,” Devin said. “We’ll be there in a moment.” After Carver’s footsteps faded he asked again, “You’re sure you’re all right?”

“I’m fine,” Anders said sitting up straight and offering a small smile. “Let’s get out of here.” He accepted Devin’s hand after he had stood and they made their way across the room to where the others stood.

The caverns they found themselves in had only one passable way to go at every intersection. There were still no darkspawn but these caves had plenty of the stone creatures Varric called rock wraiths. After two days and many of these things they came to a door. It was the first sign of anything dwarven made since they had left the altar room.

It opened easily and as they ventured further into the cavern a slightly larger version of the rock wraiths approached them through a line of columns. Anders was surprised when it began speaking. “Stop, I would see no more of these creatures killed needlessly.”

“I’d say being attacked on sight gives us plenty of need,” Devin said frowning. “What are you?”

“I am…a visitor,” it said. “The profane have lived here for centuries, feeding on the magic rock.”

Whatever else it meant to say was lost in a sudden flurry of activity. Devin drew his blades and began attacking it furiously. It took only a moment for Carver and Isabela to join him. As they lunged forward the smaller rock wraiths, the profane, appeared out of the shadows lumbering slowly toward Anders and Varric. Magic and bolts from Bianca flew as the blades severed the glowing core of the creatures. The five of them were left panting among a pile of lifeless rocks soon after the battle had begun.

“Hawke,” Isabela said leaning against one of the pillars. “What was that? Normally you at least let them finish talking before we get to fight.”

“It was a demon,” Devin said confidently. “I’ll take no chances with demons.”

“How did you know that?” Carver asked folding his arms over his chest. “It looked like one of those rock things.”

“I don’t know,” he said glancing at Anders. “Let’s find a place to stop.”

Devin sheathed his blades and turned away from them, walking slowly through the pillars. Anders wanted to know how he’d known as well. He suspected the thing wasn’t really a rock wraith when it spoke and after it admitted that it didn’t belong here either he knew something was wrong. Demons generally didn’t bother Anders since merging with Justice but he knew them and he knew to avoid them. The true question was how had Devin known?

Anders followed after him first, running to catch up to him before the others crowded around them. “How _did_ you know?” he asked quietly.

Devin glanced behind him before replying. “I think Justice told me.” He looked back again and leaned closer to Anders. “I promise I’ll explain but not here.”

To say he was stunned would have been an understatement. Justice was a part of Anders. Devin had only ever seen the spirit once, on the night they had met. How could Justice be telling Devin anything? As they made camp for the night at the other end of the large cavern, Anders thought about how that might be possible.

It came to him after their rations had been passed around and eaten, as he lay on his side with Devin’s arm around him. He remembered his first meeting with Fenris and what he’d said about demons enslaving or torturing alphas bonded with Tevinter mages. Was Devin sensing the spirit through the bond they now shared? If Fenris was to be believed that might be exactly what was happening. As unpleasant as the elf normally was he hadn’t seemed like a liar.

Not much was known about spirit possession. Many didn’t know the difference between spirits and demons. Not much was known about the bond beyond death severing it. Mages who ended up bonded with Templars were incredibly tight-lipped on the subject and there weren’t very many bonded couples outside of the circle because apostates rarely stayed free for long. The Dalish might know something however.

Anders fell asleep determined to speak with Merrill again. If anyone could educate him about the bond it would be her. He needed to know what sort of effects Justice could have on Devin, if he was in danger or not.

When they woke they continued on, all of them eager to see the sun again. They found themselves in another large cavern with another door at the other end. As before, Devin and Varric led with Carver, Anders and Isabela behind them. Since destroying the demon the previous day, they hadn’t seen any more of the rock wraiths but Anders still felt no darkspawn.

A strange noise behind them caused them all to turn. Rocks of all sizes were flying together around the largest magical core Anders had seen. Behind them was the largest rock wraith they had seen yet.

“Uh-oh, that can’t be good,” Varric murmured.

“It can be killed just like the little ones,” Devin said drawing his blades.

“Did you have to mention the little ones,” Carver said drawing his sword as well.

Several of the normal sized rock wraiths emerged from the shadows. The big one took a step forward and the ground shook slightly.

“Carver, concentrate on the big one. Isabela and I will take the little ones. Varric help Carver and Anders, you concentrate on keeping Carver on his feet,” said Devin quickly. He rushed forward and Isabela sighed before running after him.

Carver roared and met the large rock wraith in the center of the cavern. Anders heard Varric firing Bianca beside him and he began casting spells that would slow the thing down. He still paid close attention to all three of them fighting close to the rock wraiths and healed when he needed too. The large one continued forward with Carver backing slowing in front of it. Varric moved around on one side and Anders moved around on the other. It immediately turned and followed Anders.

He continued to skirt the center of the cavern, ending up closer to the few small rock wraiths that were left than he had intended. Devin appeared suddenly beside him, attacking one that had been sneaking up behind him. Anders moved away from it and decided that it was time to get rid of these annoying creatures.

Taking careful aim, he threw ice at the core of the large rock wraith. It didn’t freeze like he’d hoped but it slowed enough that Carver put his sword through the core. Anders ducked behind a pillar of rock as the thing exploded.

Before the dust had settled, Anders rushed from his hiding place to where he’d last seen Carver. Knowing that the warrior had likely taken a beating from the rock wraith flying apart in front of him, he found Carver on the ground. Anders set his staff beside him as he knelt and began pushing rocks off of the unconscious warrior.

After clearing most of his chest, Anders concentrated on healing. The others gathered around him and Devin knelt quietly beside him. When he finished, Anders sat heavily feeling light headed and sick to his stomach. He looked up at Devin and smiled. “Carver’s fine. He just needs some rest,” Anders said.

The worried look hadn’t left Devin like he’d hoped it would. “Are _you_ all right?” he asked. “You look sort of sick.”

“Used a lot of mana,” Anders sighed. “I need some rest too.”


	12. Chapter 12

The others cleared a space and Carver was carefully moved. Devin hovered until Anders was asleep next to his brother. When he woke from his short nap Anders felt better but Carver was still sleeping. He yawned as he looked around to find the others. After checking on the warrior he stood and made his way over to them.

They were in an alcove and Anders gasped when he saw what was in that small space. Gold and jewels glittered in the dim light. Isabela and Varric continued to search through the coins, statues, necklaces and other things loading their packs with the riches. Devin turned and stood when he saw Anders.

“Good news little rabbit,” he said excitedly. “There’s more than enough here to keep you safe.” Devin leaned forward suddenly and kissed him on the lips. “How’s Carver?” he asked quietly.

“Sleeping,” Anders said feeling stunned. He’d never seen so much gold in one spot before. Devin wasn’t normally affectionate where others could see either. “Maker’s breath.”

Devin turned to stand next him and Anders felt his arm around his waist. “When we get back to Kirkwall I’ll get the rights to the old Amell estate. You’ll have a place to hide, we’ll have plenty of coin for bribes, and you can concentrate on your research while I figure out how to get Bethany out of the Gallows.”

“What about my clinic?” Anders asked looking over at him. “I don’t want to stop helping those poor people until I have to.”

“There’s a cellar entrance to the estate very close to your clinic,” Devin said smiling. “You’ll never have to walk through Hightown unless you want to. Now we just have to get back to the surface.”

“Will this really work?” Anders asked quietly. “It seems…too easy.”

“It’s not going to be easy,” said Devin. “Getting the old estate back is going to be the hardest part I think. Don’t worry, I’ll make it work.”

Anders smiled even though he was still doubtful. He kept reminding himself that Devin’s mother had spent her entire life free of the circle as he helped fill their packs. Devin had earned his trust long ago by not handing him over to the Templars and with the addition of the bond their fates were tied together.

They spent a day in the cavern even after Carver woke before moving on. With all of them well rested they made their way through the Deep Roads. It took them a week to get to a familiar area. The darkspawn gradually reappeared and Anders found their vile smell made him nauseous. It hadn’t ever been a pleasant smell but his stomach had never reacted like this before. Devin was concerned but Anders told him not to worry, that it was normal. He’d taken care of a mage in the tower once that couldn’t stand the smell of elfroot for the first three months of her unexpected pregnancy.

Three more days and they were finally on the surface. Bartrand and the original expedition was nowhere to be found. Anders didn’t envy the dwarf when Devin and Varric finally did catch up with him. In two more days they were back in Kirkwall. After a long bath Anders spent an entire day reading in the journal while Devin and Carver went to see Viscount Dumar about the old Amell estate while Varric set about selling the spoils they had brought out of the Deep Roads.

The first night they spent in their bed Devin explained to him quietly why he thought Justice was communicating with him. It happened mostly when he and Anders were together. There were feelings that weren’t his, or knowledge that he shouldn’t have. Devin remembered their first meeting with Fenris as well and had been paying close attention to these odd feelings that had begun soon after leaving Anders’ clinic that day. He stressed that he never felt anything malevolent. It was mostly curiosity or disapproval with what Devin had been doing.

Anders asked if they could go to Sundermount soon so that he could speak with Merrill to learn more about this strange connection. Devin agreed that she might know more about the bond than he did. His father had been vague about the bond and Anders thought that maybe he just hadn’t known how to explain it. Anders wasn’t sure he could explain it if asked either. Anything Merrill knew would surely help though it would be after they had secured the estate.

For a week Devin went to the Viscount’s Keep every day and Anders continued to open his clinic in Darktown. The first few days were hectic but it had settled to a more normal flow of people and he was able to read in the journal more. He didn’t let any of the occasional discomforts he felt show around his patients. The slight ache and extra sensitivity of his chest was easier to hide than the occasional bouts of nausea.

Carver had been quiet and thoughtful since they had returned to the surface. Anders hadn’t seen him very much at home and he only ever came to the clinic with Devin. It was very surprising then, when Anders looked up from the journal during a lull to see Carver walking towards him.

“Carver,” said Anders feeling a spike of fear. “Is something wrong?”

“No…no nothing’s wrong,” he replied quickly. “I just…wanted to thank you for healing me down there.”

“You’re welcome,” Anders said as he watched the younger Hawke fidget nervously.

Carver took another step forward and asked almost shyly, “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure,” Anders said feeling slightly confused. Carver had never been openly antagonistic like Fenris but Anders had gotten the impression that Carver didn’t like him much. He waited for the normally sullen and angry young man to speak again and wondered what could possibly have him feeling nervous.

“What are the chances that,” Carver said. He paused to look around and continued in a low voice. “That the baby will be a mage?”

“I don’t know,” Anders said, also keeping his voice quiet. “That’s kind of what I’m trying to find out.”

Carver frowned as he nodded before sitting heavily on the nearest cot. “I’ve been thinking a lot since we got back to the surface,” he said. He fell silent and Anders waited patiently for him to continue. “After Father died…Devin was all I had. I never liked his obsession with freeing Bethany. I don’t want to lose him too…and now…” Carver looked up at him significantly for a moment then down at his hands. “He has more reason now to give up on it and I know he won’t.”

“Why don’t you help?” Anders asked softly.

“I hated him for a long time,” Carver said looking at him. “Him and Father…I was seven and I didn’t understand why they just let the bastards take her. Even after I understood I resented. They should have done something then.”

“Carver…” Anders began.

“Let me finish,” Carver interrupted. After a moment he continued. “He wants us together again but there’s more to worry about now. I can’t do anything helpful out here…but maybe if he had someone on the inside…someone he knew he could trust…we could free Bethany and keep you out of the Gallows as well. It’s all I can think of…I…can’t go through that again.”

“You can’t mean…join the Templars?” Anders whispered in horror.

“It’s all I can think of!” Carver exclaimed angrily as he stood. “Out here I’m nothing but muscle. If I’m inside I can pass along information, keep an eye on her or warn you if they’re getting too close.”

“What about all the things Templars are supposed to do? What if you have to tear up a family like yours was?” asked Anders.

“I don’t plan on being there that long,” Carver said. “When we get Bethany out Devin’s planning on leaving Kirkwall and I’ll be going with.”

“I don’t know Carver,” Anders said skeptically. “You know Templars are addicted to lyrium.”

“I know,” he said. “It’s a small price to keep my family together. I don’t expect either of you to understand or approve…but I wanted you to know that I’m still on your side.”

“Carver…I…talk to him. Before you go,” Anders said.

He nodded before leaving as abruptly as he’d come. Anders didn’t like the idea and he knew Devin wouldn’t like it either. There was nothing that they could realistically do to stop him though. Carver could do what he wanted.

As the day wore on he kept thinking back on the conversation and it finally struck him that he had been included as part of the Hawke family. Even if Carver didn’t like him, Anders had been accepted. Perhaps the baby had influenced him or maybe that he and Devin are bonded. His brother’s life depended on Anders’ freedom after all.

The more he thought about it he realized that Carver had never complained once about Devin’s sudden switch in priorities. Since he’d gone into heat, Devin had concentrated on keeping Anders safe and Carver hadn’t said one word against it. He’d even been thinking of a way he could help.

Anders found it odd to think of him as part of the Hawke family. It was understandable why Devin would risk himself but Carver didn’t have to…yet he was. His own father had turned him over to the Templars and a near stranger was going to be addicted to lyrium willingly to keep him free? Anders shook his head in disbelief. It had to be the baby and Devin that had driven Carver to this.

Only after Devin showed up did Anders realize how late it had gotten. “Here you are,” he said leaning against the desk. He didn’t sound the least bit worried. “You don’t normally stay so late, is something wrong?”

“Carver came,” Anders said as he tucked the journal into his coat. “I was thinking…I didn’t realize it was so late.”

“He told me he spoke to you,” Devin said quietly. “Before he left for the Gallows. I couldn’t talk him out of going.”

“I’m sorry,” said Anders as he wrapped an arm around his waist and leaned his head on Devin’s side. “He just wants to protect you and the baby.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for little rabbit,” Devin said brushing his fingers lightly down Anders’ cheek coming to rest on his shoulder. “Carver’s doing what he thinks he must. I don’t like it but I can’t fault him for it. Family has always been important to us…and it’s not just me and the baby. You’re a Hawke too.”


	13. Chapter 13

Three days later, Anders sat at the desk in his room reading in the journal. Everything had turned his stomach that morning and he’d gone home hoping to make it appear like he’d gotten sick suddenly and this wasn’t a regular occurrence. After a long nap he had felt much better but stayed home to keep up the illusion of being sick.

After finishing the rather large section on people that had been transferred in, there was a very short section on mages who’d been transferred out of the Gallows. The next section was a list of mages bonded to Templars. This list was disturbingly long. It looked like a third of all the mages locked in the Gallows had had one of those accidents and ended up bonded to a Templar. This number was far too large.

In the Ferelden circle there were around an eighth of the mages who’d been bonded. These were actually accidents. Potions were dropped or taken too early and one of the younger mages had actually forgotten to drink his potion once. The mages in Kinloch Hold weren’t as careless as the mages here seemed to be. It made him wonder if a few of them in the Gallows hadn’t had accidents at all. Thankfully Bethany and Karl were not on this list.

Having learned this bit of disturbing news he was now very worried for both of them. Maybe they could get Karl out along with Bethany. Anders had hated it when he had transferred. Karl had been his closest friend. He couldn’t speak much of the trade tongue when he’d arrived at the tower. Anders had been confused, scared and lonely. Karl had been the only one who had understood him and had taken the time to teach him trade. As Anders grew so had their friendship…he would definitely have to ask about freeing Karl as well.

“Not feeling very well today?” Devin asked from behind him suddenly.

Anders yelped in surprise and turned so quickly he nearly fell out of the chair. “Maker’s Breath,” he said scowling. “Don’t do that!”

“Sorry,” said Devin smiling.

“No you’re not,” said Anders still scowling. “I didn’t feel very well this morning but I’m fine now… _was_ fine.”

“It’s just so easy though,” said Devin sitting down on the bed. He turned serious and pointed to the journal. “Have you found anything yet?”

“I’ve told you about the heat suppressants right?” Anders asked as he turned to face him. When Devin nodded he continued. “Sometimes accidents happen and a mage goes into heat anyway. They end up bonded to a Templar because there are a lot of Templar alphas and the resulting child is taken away. In Ferelden, it didn’t happen very often but here…Devin this list is far too long.”

“Bethany?” he said with a small frown.

“I didn’t see her name on this list but we don’t know what’s happened since,” Anders said. “I didn’t see Karl’s name either. Could we…help him escape too?”

“I don’t see why not,” Devin said as his smile returned. “Hopefully Carver can keep her safe until I can figure something out.” He stood and held his hand out to Anders. “We’ll be moving to Hightown soon.”

“You got the estate?” asked Anders taking his hand.

Devin pulled him to his feet and smiled ruefully. “I think Carver helped a bit with that. He’s such an upstanding citizen to join the noble order of Templars.”

“What are they expecting from you then?” Anders said curiously.

“Something they’re probably not going to get,” Devin said grinning. “Shall we go see our new home?”

Anders nodded and followed him out the door. He was quiet on the way to Hightown, not wanting to draw too much attention. Hightown made him nervous in a way Lowtown didn’t. The people, when they even bothered to look, mostly snorted in disgust at him. He was just another Ferelden refugee who didn’t stay where he belonged. But their disdainful attitude would change if they knew.

Some would fear him because of his magic but those people were the least of his worries. They would simply turn him in and he’d be sent to the Gallows. He’d been caught in the Denerim market once. It was the only time he’d been thankful for the Templars that had surrounded him even though the mage they had brought with them had pointed him out. The greedy, hungry looks he’d seen on some of the onlookers had frightened him badly. None of them had been foolish enough to challenge the Templars though.

The reactions of people in Lowtown would be no different. He knew this but there were some who wouldn’t care, some that might even defend him because they had a sister or a brother in the Gallows. Anders wondered constantly how different things would be if mages weren’t so rare. Would he have received those hungry looks if there were twenty mages in that market instead of just two? He didn’t really understand why omegas were seen as valuable in the first place.

Omegas were made to produce children but an alpha woman could carry a child just as easily as he could. It certainly wasn’t the magic all omegas possessed that made them so sought after. Their magic made them feared because of the dangers demons presented. Magic was the biggest difference between omegas and the rest of Thedas. The other big difference was their heat cycles and this always brought him back to carrying a child.

Anders was beginning to understand why his ability to become pregnant might make him more appealing to some. Only after he’d actually become pregnant did he realize that he wanted children. It was a desire he hadn’t known about. Maybe he had known at some point but had suppressed it because he had thought it wouldn’t ever be possible. He was wondering now if all mages had this same suppressed desire. If they did, it was no wonder most circle mages were sort of sad underneath everything else.

Devin’s arm around his shoulder brought him out of his thoughts as they left the Hightown market. Anders was pulled slightly closer to the rogue and he looked around to find most of the people around him with that disgusted look on their face. There was a man approaching them however who looked pleased to see them. His reddish brown hair was slicked back and he had the brightest blue eyes Anders had ever seen. A bow and a quiver of arrows could be seen just above his shoulders and he was wearing shiny white armor.

Anders had never seen him before but it was clear that Devin had. His smile was guarded and his facial expression held that ‘mine’ look that Anders was discovering he loved. The archer gave Anders an appreciative glance before focusing on Devin.

“Hawke, it’s good to see you again. Have you been given the rights to the old Amell estate yet?” he said in a thick Starkhaven accent.

“I have,” Devin said. “Thank you for putting in a good word for me. I’d offer you a drink but I’m afraid the house might not be in a fit state for company yet.”

“That’s quite all right,” the archer said. “It’s the least I could do after you helped me with those mercenaries.” His gaze turned to Anders again for a moment and he asked curiously, “Is this the refugee you’ve taken in?”

“That’s not exactly how I’d describe it,” Devin said with a smirk. “But yes he’s been living with Carver and me.”

“You must be proud of your brother,” he said smiling.

“Oh yes,” Devin said. “Very proud.”

“I was hoping you might be able to help me with something,” the archer said seriously. “While you were in the Deep Roads a theft was discovered. Some important documents were taken from Grand Cleric Elthina’s office. I’ve been asked to recover them but I’ve had no luck.”

“How terrible,” Devin said as Anders shifted closer to him and crossed his arms over his chest. The documents this Starkhaven archer were talking about was very likely the journal Anders had hidden in his coat. Anders kept quiet and tried not to let his nerves show. “I’d love to help you Sebastian but I’m going to be busy with the estate for a while. We’re leaving for a couple of days tomorrow as well.”

“I understand,” Sebastian said sounding a little disappointed. “If you hear anything please contact me.”

“Of course,” said Devin. “If you’ll excuse us, we have a lot to do.”

“Thank you,” said Sebastian. “Have a pleasant trip.”

Sebastian headed towards the market and Devin began walking quickly in the other direction, his arm still across Anders’ shoulders. They rounded a corner and headed toward a door that had a bird-like crest on either side of it. He produced a key and unlocked the door, pushing Anders gently through it first.

“Andraste’s flaming knickers!” Anders exclaimed as the door shut behind him. He looked around the foyer they were in, amazed at how dirty and cluttered it was. “Someone wasn’t very big on housekeeping.”

“Slavers,” Devin snorted from behind him.

“Devin,” Anders said turning away from the mess to look at him. “Who was that?”

“Sebastian Vael,” he said frowning. “Third son to the Prince of Starkhaven, a Brother of the Chantry and he worships the ground Elthina walks on. His connections have been useful a time or two but I don’t trust him at all. Can you hurry with that journal?”

“I’ll try,” said Anders. “But it’s going to take forever to clean this place up.”

“Do you remember Bodahn?”

“The merchant with the simple son?”

“He’s so grateful that we saved his son in the Deep Roads that he has offered his services to me. Bodahn and Sandal should be along shortly. We’ll get them to cleaning and start off for Sundermount.”

“Isn’t it a little late to start off today?” asked Anders uneasily.

“We’ll be fine,” Devin said confidently. “It’ll be nice to spend a few days together out of Kirkwall.”


	14. Chapter 14

It didn’t take very long for Bodahn and Sandal to arrive. Bodahn was just as cheerful and polite as Anders remembered. Sandal smiled vaguely in his own strange way but enthusiastically went to work after Devin had told them what he wanted and where he and Anders were going. Just a short trip up the mountain to celebrate their good fortune, Devin didn’t mention the Dalish at all. After a short trip to Lowtown for their packs, Kirkwall was soon out of sight behind them.

“Do they know?” Anders asked touching his stomach briefly.

“Not yet,” Devin said. “I want to know how loyal they are first. We still have some time before you start showing.”

Just one or two short months…and wasn’t that a scary thought. It would be small at first, hardly noticeable. His bulky coat would hide it well for a while. Even after his coat couldn’t hide it they could blame his stomach on over indulgence. But that would only work for so long. Eventually it would be obvious that it wasn’t just fat that was making him round.

Bodahn at least would have to be told if he was going to hide in the estate. Anders didn’t have any idea how the dwarf would react. In his experience, dwarves generally didn’t care. He only had three examples however. Oghren, an alpha warden who helped the Commander stop the blight, had been the first dwarf he’d ever met. He had only recently left Orzammar but he’d had experience with mages during the blight. Wynne, the other Spirit Healer of Kinloch Hold, and Morrigan, supposed daughter to Flemeth. Anders had wanted nothing to do with the filthy drunken creature.

After they had picked up Sigrun in the Deep Roads near Kal’Hirol, he had a little more hope for dwarves, even though she’d been completely obsessed with death. Where Oghren hadn’t cared about his magic or his omega status, Sigrun had been at least curious about his magic. She didn’t care about his status either. Though being a beta, Sigrun didn’t really have to worry about it. Varric had been the third dwarf Anders had met and the one he liked the most.

It wasn’t really a fair comparison either. Oghren and Sigrun had spent most of their lives in Orzammar or the Deep Roads. They had treated his status as an oddity, not something to be feared or sought after. Varric on the other hand, and other surface dwelling dwarves, were more aware of mages and their status because they lived among humans and elves who could be mages and not just other dwarves who couldn’t. Even he didn’t care. Varric had been one of the first of Devin’s companions that had been told his secret and he’d shrugged it off.

“What are they?” Devin asked.

“Pardon?” Anders asked in confusion.

“Bodahn and Sandal,” he said looking over at Anders as they walked. “Father told me that even though there aren’t any dwarf mages, alpha dwarves aren’t immune to whatever it is that pulls us to you.”

“Ah, Bodahn is beta and Sandal…he doesn’t seem to be anything,” Anders said with a small frown.

“What?” Devin said looking puzzled.

“It’s sort of like…he’s a child,” said Anders looking over at him as they walked. Devin arched an eyebrow at him and he sighed. “You know the status matures along with the body. Omega children are the first to develop a status because it comes along with the magic. Most of the time, even though he’s a grown man, he’s like a child that hasn’t developed yet.”

“Most of the time?” asked Devin.

“Remember the ogre?” Anders said. “Not enchantment.”

“No,” said Devin in shock. “You can’t mean…”

Anders nodded when his voice trailed off. “When I stare at him long enough, sometimes I get flashes of omega. He’s very…intriguing.”

“I’d call that more creepy or odd than intriguing,” Devin said shaking his head.

A comfortable silence fell between them. They had this particular path up Sundermount to themselves, no Templars or travelers. Birds sang in the woods and the leaves on the trees rustled in the breeze. The air smelled fresh, not like the dank rot of Darktown or the hideous smell of the foundries in Lowtown. Anders found himself enjoying the walk and he began to relax.

The sun sank toward the horizon and they began speaking. There had been little time in the past two months for conversation. Anders began asking about Devin’s past. He wanted to know more about the man he was bonded with. For every bit of information he gained, Anders was asked about things in his past.

Devin had spent most of his early childhood wandering Ferelden’s countryside with his family. They had never stayed in the same place for very long until Carver and Bethany were born. His family had settled in Redcliffe then, on the outskirts. When Bethany had been taken they moved to Lothering. Their father had taught Devin and Carver both how to fight. They sparred against each other and their father frequently. Neither could get the better of their father until one day Devin suggested that they work together. His eyes sparkled merrily as he told of that match.

Anders’ life in comparison was dull and more than a little sad. There were long, lonely years in between escapes, months of paranoid freedom before being caught again only to spend more lonely years plotting his next escape. He hadn’t exactly been an outcast in the circle but most of the other mages didn’t understand why he kept trying.

As he sat in front of the fire that night comparing their vastly different lives, he desperately wanted their life together to be more like Devin’s childhood. He wanted their child to have that same merry twinkle when speaking about them instead of the cold detachment he felt for his own parents.

“Devin,” Anders said. He sat in front of the fire, his back to Devin’s chest, resting against him.

The rogue’s arms tightened around him for a second before Devin replied quietly. Close enough to his ear that he felt the man’s hot breath. “Yes my little rabbit?”

“Why do they lock us up?” he asked quietly. “You’re parents seemed happy. The Dalish get along just fine without locking their mages in a prison.”

“You know their reasons better than I do,” Devin said. “Personally I think they’re afraid of mages. Something that happened in the past perhaps…you do know that Tevinter once encompassed most of Thedas.”

“I know next to nothing about Tevinter,” Anders said feeling annoyed. “They don’t like killing us but they’re not afraid to make us Tranquil. Any mage caught with Tevinter texts, or even stories about the place gets the brand. Such things have to be snuck in because there isn’t anything in the library about Tevinter. That’s how it was in Ferelden and I can’t imagine any other circle being that much different.”

“That’s…suspicious. What do they teach you about Andraste?”

“Only that she was an escaped slave that united the warring tribes of barbarians in Ferelden. The bride of the Maker, writer of the Chant of Light, founder of the Andrastian religion…pretty much hated by any mage with sense. She’s the one that started all this locked up for your own good nonsense.”

“Andraste was a Tevinter slave. She led the united Fereldens in the first exalted march and pushed the borders of Tevinter to where they are now. Before she could wipe them out altogether, she was betrayed by her husband. Very few people from Tevinter actually ever leave its borders. The ones that do are usually slavers.” After a moment of silence he continued thoughtfully. “Fenris just might have some important information.”

“Too bad he’s so disagreeable,” said Anders frowning.

“I’ll get him to talk,” said Devin confidently. “Just give me some time.”

Anders settled back against him as silence fell, enjoying his closeness. He thought that maybe this was what he enjoyed most about the last two months. The touching and holding when it was just the two of them, after sleeping alone for most of his life it hadn’t taken him long to get used to being next to Devin. He was completely relaxed as he rested comfortably in Devin’s embrace thinking of all he’d learned since waking up from his nap.

His thoughts were disrupted by Devin, his lips pressed just below Anders’ ear and again just below that. Anders tilted his head slightly, allowing him better access. He kissed down his neck. “Devin,” Anders said quietly. “What…”

“Isn’t it nice,” Devin said between kisses. “Just the two of us.” His talented fingers worked the buckles on Anders’ coat quickly. “I’ve been patient but I think you’re trying to kill me.” Devin worked a hand under his shirt. “You have no idea how hard it is to be a gentleman and keep my hands to myself sometimes at night.”

“I didn’t think,” Anders said a little breathlessly. “That you were interested.”

“What gave you that idea?” asked Devin sounding amused.

Anders let his hands rest in his lap as Devin worked his other hand under his shirt and slowly slid them up his stomach. “You never brought it up. Not smart in the Deep Roads and after that I guess I just kind of forgot.”

Devin laughed softly and his hands stopped their climb to his chest. “How can you possibly forget about sex?”

“It’s not like I’ve been getting much since that last time I escaped the tower. Out here it’s a little more dangerous. It’s just one more way to get caught so I got used to going without.”

“We’ll definitely have to change that then,” Devin said. “May I continue?”

“Maker yes,” Anders said eagerly.


	15. Chapter 15

“Let’s get this coat off,” Devin whispered.

His hands slid to Anders’ sides as he leaned forward and shook his arms out of the sleeves. Anders threw his coat to the side and Devin pulled him back against him. Up his sides and around front, his hands glided across Anders’ skin with just enough pressure not to tickle. His warm lips against his neck again, this time with a small hint of his tongue. Closing his eyes he tilted his head to the side as Devin moved down his neck and along his shoulder, kissing and licking.

The hands under his shirt moved up and then down, slowly tracing along scars from his days at Vigil’s Keep. Down to the waistband of his trousers and back up to his chest, nimble fingers dancing along his ribs to rest briefly on his slightly swollen chest before running down his sides to rest on his hips.

Anders had no idea that touching could feel quite this good. His experiences consisted of quick trysts in hidden corners or sneaking into another’s room and back out before being caught. The other mages might have been able to take their time but he had always been watched so closely that getting caught in the act was always a danger. Just because the Templars didn’t care didn’t mean he wanted an audience so speed had been necessary.

He placed his hands on Devin’s thighs and sighed in contentment. Devin leaned forward slightly, pushing Anders upright. “Boots off please,” he whispered in Anders ear then licked up the shell. Anders shuddered slightly before opening his eyes and leaning forward to unlace his boots. As he leaned forward, Devin’s hands slid up his back, thumbs tracing his spine up to his shoulder blades.

It was a little hard to concentrate on unlacing his boots. His pants grew tight as he grew hard. The caressing and kissing through his shirt arousing in a way he’d never experienced before. Anders tried to be patient as he finally kicked off his boots and sat up, knowing how slick he was becoming.

Devin kissed the back of his neck and his hands rested once again on Anders’ waistband. One hand slipped under it as the other pulled at the lacings. Anders closed his eyes again, feeling the soft lips at his neck and the hands that worked open his trousers and slid under his small clothes. He whimpered softly as he felt hands around his cock, pulling him free of his small clothes. It felt amazing…but it wasn’t what he wanted. Anders worked his pants and smalls off, throwing them on top of his coat. Devin squeezed and stroked him, his other hand running along his thigh.

“Devin,” Anders panted trying to lean forward again. Devin prevented him from leaning too far and he whimpered again. “Please…I want…”

“Patience rabbit,” Devin purred. Anders moaned softly, his words accompanied by a gentle squeeze. “On your knees.”

He couldn’t hold back the disappointed noise he made when the hands disappeared but he hurriedly followed Devin’s instructions. Anders knelt between his legs, arching his back as he rested his head on his arms. Devin’s hands ran up his thighs, over his arse and up to his back. One hand sliding down to his hip and further to his thigh while the other he felt running lightly down the cleft of his arse to circle his entrance. Circling, teasing, pressing lightly and circling again.

Anders pushed back, wanting, and was rewarded as Devin finally pushed his finger past the tight ring of muscle. He thrust slowly, adding another finger after what felt like an eternity. Anders met his thrusts eagerly, wanting more, trying not to be impatient. Three fingers now worked in and out, scissoring and stretching, rubbing and pressing, finding that spot and Anders groaned loudly.

Devin’s fingers disappeared and he whined softly at the loss. Anders didn’t have to wait long to be filled. He felt Devin push into him slowly, his hands skimming over his back coming to rest at his hips and Devin’s push inside of him stopped.

“Don’t stop,” Anders pleaded pushing back, trying to take in his knot. The hands at his hips held him firm and he wasn’t at all surprised at the undignified whine that escaped him. He remembered the fear from their first time but there was none of that fear now, only anticipation. Anders also remembered how amazing it had felt, the way his knot had rubbed all the right spots inside and he wanted to feel that again while he wasn’t half crazy with need. “Please!”

“We’ll be stuck together,” Devin said soothingly. “Not the smartest idea out here.”

“I’ll protect us with my magic,” Anders begged trying to push back again. “Please Devin!”

“Maker, you’re beautiful,” whispered Devin. “All right.”

“Yes,” Anders moaned as Devin held his hips firmly and he felt his knot pass through. Devin paused a moment when he was hilted, rubbing soothing circles on his back. It felt better than he remembered, being stuffed full of his cock. Anders rocked back, and was rewarded. Devin began thrusting fast and hard and Anders met his thrusts. Lost to the almost overwhelming pleasure, his senses were reduced to the hands at his hips and the cock that shuttled quickly in and out of his entrance.

Anders’ cock was rock hard, slapping his stomach lightly with each powerful thrust. Moans escaped him between pants and a gasp as he came, his own useless seed splattering on the ground beneath him. He groaned loudly as Devin chased his own release. Finally he grunted and thrust once more before they stilled.

They heard the woods around them in the sudden quiet. The chirping of crickets, the hoot of an owl and the crackling fire not far away as their breathing slowly returned to normal. Anders didn’t want to move but pushed himself up on his hands anyway. He glanced over his shoulder and smiled as he said, “I never used to be so loud.”

Devin smirked as he pulled them into a sitting position. “I like hearing all those noises.”

Anders groaned and shuddered as Devin shifted inside of him until they rested comfortably. His shirt fell back down from where it had been rucked up to his armpits. He leaned back slightly as Devin’s arms circled him, resting his hands atop the rogue’s as they crossed over his stomach and rested on his sides.

“How is this going to work when I get really big,” Anders wondered aloud.

“I’m sure we’ll figure out something,” Devin said confidently.

***

The guards that stood at the entrance of the Dalish encampment nodded as Devin led them in. Anders looked around, noticing that a few of the warriors still watched them. Most of the elves here had gotten used to seeing Devin and his companions occasionally. Anders had been here a few times but Devin had come often enough on various errands. Their conversations weren’t interrupted and children ran about, their games continuing as Devin and Anders passed.

Merrill struggled to her feet excitedly not far away. She was now heavy with child, her belly large and round as she walked over to greet them. “It’s been a while!” she said smiling as she stopped in front of them. Mahariel, never far from her, sat at the fire where she had been sitting, watching them. Merrill tapped her lips with a finger while the other’s drummed on her belly thoughtfully.

“You look different,” she said after a moment of silent study. “Happier…less nervous.” Her gaze shifted slightly to Devin for a moment before snapping back to him, a large smile surfacing. “He _is_ yours now isn’t he?”

Anders nodded and smiled as she squealed happily and clapped her hands together. “Are you expecting?” Merrill asked her eyes shining. At his nod she pulled him into a brief hug and asked excitedly, “How far along are you?”

“Almost two months,” Anders said smiling. “I’d like to ask about a few things.”

“Aren’t you a healer?” she asked in sudden confusion. “Is there a problem? Should I go get Keeper Marethari?”

Merrill half turned, slightly worried, and Anders touched her arm lightly while Devin chuckled beside him. “No I’m fine,” he said quickly. “The baby’s fine, everything’s been normal so far.”

She turned back to them relieved. “That’s good. What sort of questions then?”

“Let’s go sit,” Anders said. “There are some…things I need to explain.”

He began speaking quietly as they sat around the fire. Both Merrill and Mahariel listened quietly without interrupting as he told them about Justice. How he’d been trapped outside the Fade and everything up to their joining. Anders stressed that Justice was a spirit, not a demon and how he wished to help Anders accomplish his goals. Devin helped him fill in what had happened the last two months and tried to explain why he thought Justice was communicating with him. They were both very clear about not having felt anything malevolent from the spirit.

“I think it’s because of the bond but we know so little about it,” said Anders. “I want to know if Devin is in danger.”

“All spirits are dangerous,” Merrill said.

“He’s been possessed longer than I’ve known him,” Devin said. Anders could hear a note of annoyance in his voice. “If something bad was going to happen it would have long before now. We just want to know more about the bond.”

“That’s a little hard to explain,” Merrill said sounding scholarly. “The bond is a little different for every couple. Over time it will strengthen and you might be able to know what the other is thinking or find the other over long distances.”

“What you’re feeling,” Mahariel said pointing to Devin. “Probably is the spirit. You must be careful. It can affect you the same way it can affect him.”

“Does that mean the spirit can possess me as well?” Devin asked skeptically.

“Not like it does Anders,” Merrill said shaking her head. “It can tempt you or give you nightmares that sort of thing. We don’t have many things like that happen amongst the Dalish.”

“Why is that?” Anders asked curiously.

“Dalish mages are bonded with an alpha much earlier than you have been,” she said. “Often the first time we go into heat. They give us reasons to resist the temptations of spirits.”

“Are the mages paired with an alpha by your elders or do you choose?” Devin asked.

“When a child is discovered to be a mage, the clan is searched for an alpha that will complement the mage,” Merrill explained. “They learn what’s expected of them and about magic together.”

“You’re betrothed to someone quite a few years older than you are?” Anders asked feeling a bit horrified. The youngest child he remembered coming to the Tower was six. The poor girl had no idea why she was there and he couldn’t imagine her understanding being promised to someone who was ten years older than she was any better. Even he wouldn’t have understood at age twelve.

Merrill simply smiled and nodded. Devin patted his knee and returned her smile. “It seems to work fairly well,” he said. “Thank you for answering our questions. If we’re going to get back to Kirkwall before dark we should head out now.” He stood and helped Anders up as well.

From her seated position Merrill looked up at him and said, “I know things are different among the shemlen. If you ever need help with your baby, I’ll try my best to get you help among the Dalish. There are so few of us, _I_ wouldn’t turn you away at least.”

“Thank you Merrill,” Anders said gratefully.

“Until next time,” Devin said cheerfully before turning to leave.

Anders waved over his shoulder and followed Devin out. They were well away from the encampment before he spoke. “I don’t think I’d like that arrangement.”

“I know I wouldn’t,” Devin snorted. After a moment he chuckled. “According to them we’ve got it backwards. You’re older than I am.”

“Only by a few years,” Anders said a little defensively.

“Easy little rabbit,” Devin said smiling. They walked on in silence for a few moments before he spoke again. “Do you mind one more night out here?”

“Not really,” said Anders. “Less to worry about out here.”

“Good,” he said sounding serious suddenly. “I have a few questions and the fewer ears that hear them the better.”


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait and the short chapter.

They used the same campsite that they had the previous night. A fire was burning merrily with their dinner cooking over the flames. Devin sat across from him looking unusually serious. Anders kept himself busy with little things while he waited for Devin to begin talking. He was curious about what questions Devin wanted to ask but he knew that the rogue would ask when he was ready. His first question didn’t surprise Anders at all.

“What’s the difference between spirits and demons?”

“They are the Maker’s first children and they live in the Fade. That’s where their similarity ends. Spirits embody our good traits like, compassion, faith or justice. They generally aren’t interested in us. Demons are malevolent, jealous of us and they seek a way into our world. They focus on our darker traits, desire, pride, sloth things like that.”

“It’s the demons that tempt and give you nightmares?” he asked. “I’m not worried about Justice. He can be a pain in the arse sometimes but he’s generally been helpful.”

“That’s right. What are you thinking?” Anders asked curiously.

“What they said and how closely it matched with what Fenris said,” Devin mused. “If the rumors you hear of Tevinter are true, Mages rule.”

“I wonder if there are more mages in Tevinter than the rest of Thedas,” Anders said.

“I’ll definitely start working on Fenris. It might help us figure out something,” said Devin said looking at him from across the fire. “How close are you to finishing with that book?”

“Fairly close,” said Anders. “I think there are only one or two more sections.”

“Good,” he said. “Try to finish up quickly. I want that book in back in the Chantry as soon as possible. It’ll keep Vael from discovering something he shouldn’t.”

“Is he that dangerous?” asked Anders feeling nervous.

“He truly believes,” Devin said grimly. “If he found out you’re a mage I don’t think he’d hesitate to turn you in.”

***

Anders paced in their room in Lowtown. He’d spent the last three days studying the journal after they’d gotten back. The children born from accidents in the Gallows had occupied the last section of the book. Extensive records were kept on these children and occupied the last quarter of the journal. What he had found had intrigued him.

All of the children were wards of the Chantry. At least a third of them had ended up in various circles outside of Kirkwall. Of the ones that weren’t locked in the circles, a third of them ended up involved with the Chantry as Templars, Sisters or Brothers. The rest ended up merchants, mercenaries, smiths, just average citizens of Thedas.

One of the first names on the list was Malcolm Hawke. The implications of this find were enormous if this child was indeed Devin’s father. The book covered about sixty years of these accidental children, which fit with what he knew of Devin’s parents. Malcolm Hawke had been one of the children that ended up unaffiliated with the Chantry, which also fit what he knew of Devin’s father.

Anders stopped pacing and sat at the desk. He pulled a clean piece of parchment from the pile and picked up his quill and began writing in an effort to organize his scattered thoughts. Most of the Dalish mages were born to bonded pairs but not all of them. Of the children born to mages in the Gallows over that last sixty years a third of them were mages. The only bonded pair he knew of outside the circle had produced three children, one of which was a mage. It was possible that the alpha of that pair had been the child of a mage.

There had to be a connection, mages having a higher chance to create more mages. Finding Malcolm Hawke’s name among the list of accidental children had posed another question. Did the non-mage children of mages have a better chance of having a mage child? This would explain the oddity of his birth. Neither of his parents had been mages but his father had been a devout Andrastian.

He ran the feathered end of the quill along his jaw as he thought back to the first twelve years of his life. His mother’s parents had been poor farmers but he couldn’t recall anything of his father’s parents. Was it possible that his father had been one of these accidental children? If his father hadn’t known his parents he wouldn’t have spoken about them. If he were raised in the Chantry like all the others he might have believed he was an orphan.

Even if he had been the product of an alpha Templar and an omega mage, it was still long odds. Anders had been the eldest of four, his youngest sister just learning to walk. He had no way of knowing if his brother or two sisters were also mages or if he had more siblings that he didn’t know about. They were all much too young when Anders had been shipped off to Ferelden.

Throwing the quill onto the desk he began pacing again. It was all guess work but it made sense. Known mages weren’t allowed to reproduce. Of the accidental babies of mages, a third of them were shipped right back to a circle and another third stayed with the Chantry. That left the last third of them to marry and have children, children that could be omega but more often weren’t.

Anders stopped pacing suddenly and clenched his hands into fists. “Maker’s breath,” he said quietly. “They’re not protecting us…they’re killing us!” His pacing resumed and he crossed the length of the bedroom in a few quick strides only to turn at the bed and cross the distance to the wardrobe again. “Do they know? How could they _not_ know?” Hands clenching and releasing in a rhythmic pattern as he charged from one side of the room to the other, and he realized he was furious.

His stomach rolled suddenly and he darted for the trash bin, barely managing to avoid a mess as his unhappy stomach sent up his lunch. As he knelt on the floor shaking slightly he heard the door. He felt someone crouching next to him and knew it was Devin.

“Everything all right?” Devin asked quietly rubbing across his shoulders.

“Yes, I’m fine.” Anders said wiping his mouth and he looked over at Devin. “I’m finished with the journal. They’re killing us Devin. They lock us up, keep us afraid, prevent us from having children and take away the ones that are born.”

“Here,” Devin said pulling him to his feet. Anders allowed himself to be led to the desk chair and sank into it gratefully. “Tell me what you’ve found.”

Devin leaned on the desk as Anders spoke. His expression was mostly neutral, even the mention of Malcolm Hawke only warranted a raised eyebrow. When Anders finished he was just as angry as before. Devin continued to lean on the desk, arms folded across his chest, a dark but thoughtful look on his face.

“It certainly looks like you’ve found why mages are declining,” he said. “What are they scared of?” Devin added quietly after a moment.

“What does it matter?” Anders said angrily. “It can’t continue. Something has to be done!”

“Something will be done,” Devin said sharply. “Not all members of the Chantry have ulterior motives. Some of them are just as deluded as the mages in their care.” He smiled suddenly and stroked down Anders' cheek with the back of his hand. “Patience little rabbit,” he said soothingly. “I have another research project for you.”

Anders closed his eyes and tried to calm himself. Devin had just as many reasons to want change as he did. He wouldn’t have gotten this information if it hadn’t been for their unusual meeting. Patience had been a necessity to escape the tower each time he’d done it and he could continue to be patient.

“Okay,” Anders said nodding. “What do you need?”

“I want you to research the origins of the Circle of Magi,” he said. “I’ll get you the materials.” Anders didn’t quite understand how that knowledge would help in any way but he nodded. “Now pack your things. We’ve got a few rooms mucked out and we’re going to live in the study while the rest are being cleaned.”


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because I can't figure out how to get this information into the story I'll just tell you now. The incident at the Tower during the blight didn't happen. The Warden still showed up and demanded aid, which was provided, conscripted Wynne and left. These mages are seriously cowed and wouldn't go along with Uldred's crazy plan.

It didn’t take long to gather his things but they had to make several trips to the estate. When all of their possessions were scattered around in the study and the kitchen night had fallen. They sat on the couch and ate a cold supper, after which Devin took the journal and left. He promised to return soon. Anders was honestly glad to be rid of it. He would be even happier when Devin snuck it back into the Chantry, which was what he thought the rogue was doing. Without the journal in their possession this Sebastian Vael would have no reason to suspect them of the theft.

Anders didn’t venture beyond the study that night. The next day Devin showed him the cellar entrance to Darktown, where he spent the largest portion of that day healing its residents. Four days after Devin had taken the journal they were visited by Sebastian. He smiled politely when Vael had nodded at him and was happy when Devin offered him a tour of the estate. The wolfish grin Devin wore as they left the room had become very familiar to Anders.

He continued to skim through one of the books Devin had brought home and found out later that Sebastian had told Devin that the documents he had been looking for were found. With the journal back in the Chantry they were relatively safe from discovery for the moment. He had also figured out that if he ate something every few hours the morning sickness wasn’t as big of a problem and there was less chance of someone figuring out that he was pregnant.

Life fell into a nice routine. Devin, Bodahn, Sandal and whichever one of his friends he could talk into helping continued to gut and clean the estate. Slowly the rooms filled out with new furniture, carpets and various decorations. Anders continued to spend most of his time in Darktown. He usually took a basket of food along as well as one of the books he was going through. Devin had provided several books but so far the ones he’d gone though had more information on the beginnings of the Chantry not the circle.

Carver’s first visit to the estate came two weeks after they had moved in. He had surpassed some recruits that had been there for years in his training. Even though he hadn’t been there for very long, Carver had discovered that there were two different factions among the Templars, his term for the two groups were bastards and believers.

The bastards had the Knight-Commander behind them. They were filled with zealots and most of the Templars who believed they were better than the mages they supposedly protected. Carver had attached himself to the smaller group of believers. Templars that actually believed they were there to protect the mages, from others and themselves, were led by Knight-Captain Cullen.

Anders had known Cullen, a Fereldan Templar that had been stationed in the Tower while he was there, was in Kirkwall. He’d been very careful to avoid him the few times he’d had to go to the Gallows searching for ingredients for the heat suppressant. In the Tower, Cullen had always been one of the nice Templars. He had also been assigned to watch Anders after his second escape. Duty had always been important to Cullen, which was why Anders had avoided him. He knew Anders and wouldn’t hesitate to lock him away for his own good. After cautioning Carver not to mention him to Cullen especially, he asked if Carver knew what that particular Templar was doing in the Gallows.

Since both of them were Fereldan, Carver and Cullen had struck an easy friendship. After the blight was over, Cullen had been transferred to the Gallows. The Chantry was aware of the high number of ‘accidents’ in the Gallows and had transferred in a few high-ranking Templars to try and reduce these accidents. Why they didn’t simply get rid of Knight-Commander Meredith, who seemed content to let her Templars do whatever they wanted, was beyond Anders.

Tensions were high in the Gallows as a result. Carver said that there were very few mischievous mages. They stayed together and tried their hardest not to attract the attention of any Templars. This was making it hard for him to find Bethany. The mages knew which Templars were safe but it seemed all recruits were avoided until they proved themselves somehow.

After another week of cleaning Devin left the rest of it to Bodahn and Sandal. He began spending a good portion of his time with Fenris. Devin often came home frustrated. It was proving difficult to win over the elf again. Anders didn’t really like how much time he was spending with Fenris but he also understood why Devin was doing it.

Anders had only found one piece of a larger puzzle. With the information Devin had already helped him gather, the picture was clearer but still not complete. The knowledge Fenris possessed of Tevinter would provide another piece of the puzzle. He suspected that Devin also thought knowing the origins of the Circle of Magi would also help make the big picture clear.

He read in the books every spare moment he could find, searching for this knowledge. Almost four weeks after Devin had given him the task he was finally starting to make some progress. The Circle of Magi had come into being _after_ Andraste had died. It had been quite a while after her death it seemed, when Ambrosia II was the reigning Divine. She had called for mages everywhere to be rounded up and set the Templars as guards but he couldn’t find anything on why the Divine had done it.

As he worked in his clinic he wondered if Tevinter’s history had something to do with it. All of the books he was currently looking through were Chantry approved texts. They would have nothing about Tevinter in them and it would explain why he couldn’t find any information about why the mages had been gathered into the circles.

While he was cleaning and bandaging some scrapes a boy had received from falling into one of the many rubbish piles around Darktown, he heard someone else come through the door. Looking up briefly he held in the surprise he felt at seeing Sebastian Vael standing just inside his doorway. Vael had been a regular visitor to the estate. Anders generally avoided him and Devin helped by keeping his attention away from him. He’d never seen the archer in Darktown or even Lowtown before now.

Without hurrying, he finished with his patient but watched Sebastian out of the corner of his eye. The archer was walking towards them, watching him intently. Anders moved around the cot the boy had been sitting on and began cleaning up after he had been thanked and they left. “Can I help you?” he asked politely carefully keeping the cot between them.

“I had no idea that you’re the Darktown Healer,” Sebastian said smiling. “According to the rumors you’re quite talented.”

“Yes,” said Anders with a little nervous laughter. “Just some skills I picked up here and there.”

“Sebastian!” Devin exclaimed melting out of the shadows. “What are you doing here?” Anders managed to avoid looking startled even though he was. Vael took a step backwards and then sighed. Devin grinned broadly as he stood next to Anders, putting an arm around his waist.

“I do wish you wouldn’t do that,” Sebastian said sighing again. “I’ve been hearing rumors of the good works from the Darktown Healer and came to see for myself.”

“Yes, Anders is a very good healer,” said Devin nodding. “Since you’re here I have something you might be interested in helping me with. If you’ll give me a moment, I need to speak with Anders privately.” The Archer nodded and wandered slowly toward the door. Devin turned to face the opposite direction and Anders turned with him. He spoke softly enough that Sebastian wouldn’t hear. “I think it’s time for the clinic to close. If you’re drawing the Chantry’s attention it won’t be much longer before they send Templars instead of a Brother.”

Anders nodded and said nothing. Devin was right. He hadn’t thought his clinic would ever draw this sort of attention. No one seemed to care what happened to the residents of Darktown. It had been safe down here with the other refugees. He couldn’t imagine what he’d done to draw their attention but it was definitely unwanted.

“Try to be home soon,” Devin said as he turned to follow Vael to the door. “Oh, I have another book for you at home.”

He smiled and watched Devin usher Sebastian out the door. Anders grabbed his pack and put the books he’d brought with into the bottom. While he was going through his potions, deciding which ones to take to the estate, more patients came in. They were simple cases and he thought a few more surely wouldn’t make a difference. A few patients turned into the rest of the afternoon. When he finally had the potions in his pack, he shouldered it and took one last look around. Seeing nothing he thought he might need he took his staff and blew out the lamps on his way to the door. With the doors shut he turned to lock them.

“Anders,” a familiar voice said from behind him.

Anders whipped around, dropping his keys and his staff in fright. He leaned against the door and gasped as he felt the silence cutting off his mana. He only realized now that he was trapped what an awful position his clinic was in. Behind him stood the person in Kirkwall he wanted to see the least. He wasn’t wearing the armor with the blazing sword on the breastplate, how he’d managed to walk without Anders hearing.

“Ser Cullen,” he said in a frightened whisper.


	18. Chapter 18

Cullen took a cautious step toward him and away from the stairs. His only weapon was a knife sheathed at his waist but Anders knew that Cullen wouldn’t use it. As a Spirit Healer, Anders was far too valuable. He briefly considered going for the cellar entrance but the door was locked. The Templar would be on him before he could even pick up his keys. Trying to get past him to the stairs was his only chance. His timing would have to be perfect.

“Please,” Anders said softly, trying to control his fear. “Let me go.”

“I can’t do that,” Cullen said taking another step forward. “There are too many ways for you to be hurt. You’ll be safe in the Gallows.”

“I’ve been safe enough,” said Anders pushing away from the door. He rolled his staff in front of him with his foot, watching Cullen closely.

“Only because you can make the suppressant,” Cullen said logically. “I thought I saw you months ago in the Gallows but I couldn’t find you. We’ve known about this little clinic for quite some time.”

As he spoke Cullen edged closer. Anders had managed to get the staff on top of his boot. Just a little closer, he thought. “Why come now?” he asked.

“Come with me Anders,” said Cullen. “You won’t have to be scared anymore.”

“You scare me,” said Anders. Cullen took a small step forward, his arm outstretched and Anders took his chance. He kicked the staff and it flew awkwardly at the Templar. With his attention on the staff, Anders darted for the stairs. He saw Cullen bat the staff away and then he was past him. There was a tug on his pack that slowed him for only a moment as he twisted just enough so that Cullen pulled it off his shoulder. He took the stairs two at a time.

“Anders, wait!” Cullen yelled.

He sounded far too close. Anders ran down the familiar tunnels of Darktown, taking a twisting path to try and lose the Templar behind him. He rounded another corner but he could still hear Cullen calling his name. Without his armor Cullen could match the pace Anders set. The residents of Darktown quickly moved out of his way as he came around the next corner and up the stairs to Lowtown.

Anders risked a glance backward and saw that he had gained some distance on Cullen. People cried out in surprise or yelled as he shoved his way through them. He took a winding route through the confusing hexes hoping to put enough distance between them for him to find someplace to hide. Another glance backward proved that it wasn’t working and Anders tried to calm the panic that was growing even as he ran.

There was a stich in his side and his limbs were growing heavy as he skidded around the corner. He saw the familiar large figure over the doorway, hands bound and hanging by one foot, and Anders dashed for it. Slamming the door shut after him, he wasted no time in climbing the stairs at the back of the tavern. Anders slid to a stop in Varric’s private suite.

Varric was seated at the far end of the table with Isabela sitting next to him. Under other, less dire, circumstances the stunned look on their faces might have been amusing. Between panting breaths he managed to say, “Templar…Cullen…following.”

“Shit. Does he know?” Isabela said standing. Anders nodded and pressed a hand to the stitch in his side.

Varric hurried to the doorway and peered out. “There he is,” he said grimly. “I’ll stall him you take care of Blondie.”

Isabela grabbed a mug from the table as Varric disappeared. She took his arm and pulled him quickly down the hallway to another door. “Through there, hurry” she said in a commanding tone. Anders opened the door and was pushed through. The room was stark, a bed pushed against the far wall, nightstand beside it, a table with a few chairs and a wardrobe. The only place to hide was the wardrobe and Anders didn’t think he’d fit.

“Coat, shirt and boots off now,” Isabela said shutting the door quietly behind her. She set the mug on the table and sat in one of the chairs tugging her own boots off.

He was confused as he quickly worked the buckles on his coat. There was little he could do but trust her. After her boots were off the bracelets and necklaces she wore came next. Isabela stood and took his coat from the chair he’d placed it on and threw it in the wardrobe. When his shirt was off and lying on the same chair she picked up the mug she’d brought with her.

“Close your eyes and hold your nose sweet thing,” she said before dumping the awful smelling ale over his shoulders. He gasped as the cold liquid ran down his back and chest.

“What…” he began.

“Get those boots off,” she interrupted shoving him in one of the chairs.

Anders bent to work the buckles on his boots and felt her pull the leather tie out of his hair. She ran her fingers through it to get rid of the tail. When he sat in the chair with his boots on the floor beside his feet, she kicked his boots under the bed and pulled him up. The blue kerchief that normally held her hair back was on the table and her hair looked as messy as his surely did.

“Bed quickly,” she ordered pulling the blue sash off her waist. “On your side facing the wall. Hurry he’s coming!” The covers were pulled back and he did as she ordered. The blankets were pulled up to his waist and he felt her weight behind him on the bed. Anders felt her hair on his shoulders as she leaned close to his ear. “You’re passed out. Don’t talk, don’t move no matter what.”

Before Isabela had finished speaking there was a pounding on the door. Anders closed his eyes and tried to make his breathing even. He felt her stand and the pounding continued. “Go away,” Isabela yelled sounding sleepy and irritated.

“Open up.” His voice was muffled through the door but it was definitely Cullen.

“Piss off…I’m sleeping,” she yelled. Her weight settled behind him on the bed and he could feel her bare skin pressed against his back. Anders didn’t move as she spooned against him, pulling the covers up a little further and draping her arm over his side. Isabela settled just as the door opened.

The booted footsteps he could hear stopped abruptly. “I…I’m sorry miss,” Cullen stammered.

Anders could imagine the blush creeping up his cheeks as he saw what appeared to be a couple having a nap. Given that the covers were only pulled halfway up his side and they were both bare from the waist up there was plenty of flesh on display. Suddenly he understood Isabela’s intentions and he hoped Cullen would assume what Isabela had meant him too.

She shifted slightly behind him and he felt an irrational urge to laugh at the strangled noise Cullen made. “Can’t a girl nap in peace?” she said still sounding sleepy and irritable.

“I’m…looking for a…man…,” said Cullen haltingly.

“Not with your eyes closed,” teased Isabela.

“Has anyone…come in here in the last few minutes?” asked Cullen firmly.

Isabela snorted a brief burst of laughter. “Isn’t it obvious?” she said mockingly.

“Andraste preserve me,” Cullen whispered. “Can he answer my questions?”

“Passed out,” Isabela said shifting again. “Poor thing can’t hold his liquor.” She yawned and snuggled against him. “Got a wonderful ride first though…make sure to close the door on your way out.”

Anders kept his breathing even as the footsteps came closer. Isabela shifted again and he felt her grab something under the pillow. After a moment of stillness the footsteps receded and Anders heard the door.

“Don’t move,” Isabela commanded softly. She disappeared from the bed and he barely heard her soft footsteps moving toward the door. Silence fell inside her room but the noisy chatter could still be heard from the common room of the tavern. Anders lay on his side, keeping still. He opened his eyes and saw only the wooden wall in front of him.

After what felt like an eternity Isabela finally said, “He’s gone.”

He hesitated a moment before sitting up and turning to rest against the wall. Her back was to him and thankfully Isabela had her shirt on. Before she could turn around or Anders could say anything there was another knock on the door.

“Rivaini?” Varric said through the door. She took a step forward and opened the door. Varric stepped through quickly and shut the door behind him. He took in her half-dressed figure and his mostly undressed figure and whistled. “Hawke is going to murder you,” he said shaking his head.

Isabela smiled. “It worked didn’t it?” she said. “Besides, it was all I could think of on such short notice.”

“Have you got something else for Blondie to wear?” Varric asked, serious once more. “We need to get him out of here.”

“The whole city is going to be crawling with Templars shortly,” Anders said softly. “Probably a few trusted mages who can point me out too. It’s only a matter of time before I’m caught.”

“If we can get you to the estate you can hide,” Isabela said.

“No,” said Anders shaking his head. “If I’m found in the estate Devin will be killed.”

“Maybe we can get you out of Kirkwall,” Varric suggested.

“I’m caught Varric,” Anders said sadly. “Cullen won’t stop until I’m found. Find Carver…he’s the only Templar I trust. Get Aveline or Fenris then find Devin and keep him away from the Gallows until he can think straight.”

“Hawke won’t take any of this very well,” Varric said quietly. “Are you sure this is what you want?”

“No, this is not what I want,” Anders said heatedly. “What I want is a farm in the countryside where we can raise our children without their blighted interference. Find Carver and he can take me in. No apostate stays free for as long as I have without an alpha and he’s the only one who won’t go find him. If you want Devin alive as much as I do then please, hurry. He’ll have six months to figure out how to get me out.”

“You’ve used that potion to stay free,” said Isabela. “Hawke’s been your alpha for three months. You don’t have to do this.”

“How easy was it for you to fuck with that Isabela?” asked Anders angrily. “They know I’m here and they won’t stop. How long did it take for them to finally decide the mage who killed all those Templars the night I met Devin got away? Months. Cullen _knows_ me. My description will be everywhere in a matter of hours.”

Isabela frowned deeply and stared down at her feet. Varric was also frowning and neither of them said a word.

“Find Carver,” Anders said firmly. “It’s the only way to keep Devin alive. They won’t hurt me. I’m too valuable.”


	19. Chapter 19

While he waited, Anders washed off the alcohol Isabela had poured over him. The smell was making him a little nauseous and he didn’t really want to smell like terrible ale or vomit when he was taken to see the Knight-Commander. He dressed and sat in one of the chairs to wait wanting nothing more than to find Devin so they could run. That wasn’t possible though, Devin would be killed and he would be taken to the Gallows anyway.

Letting Carver take him in was the only way to keep both Devin and his unborn child safe. Templars rarely used deadly force on mages but being roughed up wasn’t out of the question. He wouldn’t chance a gauntleted fist to the gut. It worried him what they would do when they discovered that he was pregnant. It wouldn’t take long. He would be questioned about his next heat and when he refused to take the potion he would be questioned again. Even if he could manage to push that out he would probably begin showing within the next month.

When the door opened next, almost two hours had passed. Anders couldn’t help the sharp spike of fear at seeing a Templar walk boldly into Isabela’s room. Even though the face was familiar, the armor itself inspired a fear that had been forced into him since he was twelve. A fear that was now amplified twofold, fear for his alpha and his child.

Carver closed the door behind him. “What’s going on?” he asked gruffly. “We were given a description that could only be yours. I got away from my unit to try and warn you or Devin. Varric found me first and tells me I have to come here and then turn you in?”

“Cullen found me,” Anders said softly, unable to keep his bottom lip from quivering. “I came here…Varric and Isabela helped me get away. There are too many Templars here…I can’t…get away. Devin…”

“Andraste’s ass,” Carver muttered. “Devin’s going to kill me.”

“If you take me in…at least he’ll be alive,” whispered Anders.

“Did the Knight-Captain silence or mana drain you?” Carver asked.

“Yes,” said Anders standing. “It’s worn off though.”

“I have to…,” said Carver apologetically.

Anders nodded and closed his eyes. He couldn’t stop the whimper that escaped as he was silenced for the second time that day. His arms were tied loosely behind his back and they began the long walk to the Gallows. Their trip to the docks was a blur, Carver’s hand heavy on his shoulder. He paid little attention to anything around him. This was a journey that he’d made before and he had no wish to see the fearful, curious or hungry looks from the crowd.

More Templars joined them on the way, but Anders hardly noticed them. With Carver on his left, a red headed Templar on his right and more of them in front and behind him, the ferry took them across the water to the Gallows. The ride across the water seemed endless and yet it was over all too quickly. His last glimpse of Kirkwall seen through those faceless suits of armor that were, once more, his guards.

The anguished looking statues had never seemed more appropriate as he was led through the courtyard. The gates slammed shut behind him and he squeezed his eyes closed for a moment. He hoped they had found Devin. He hoped that they could keep him safe. Devin was his only hope of ever getting out of this prison.

Carver and the red headed Templar led him through a maze of hallways. The ones that were behind had broken away soon after the gates had shut. He was led down a set of stairs to a row of cells that could only be solitary confinement. Anders was searched after his hands were untied. He was stripped down to his shirt and trousers and pushed gently through one of the doors. He sat on the pallet and the last person he saw for two days was Carver. The worried look he wore was out of place.

The cell was comfortable as far as cells went. Warm blankets, decent meals pushed through a slot at the bottom of the door, a chamber pot that was emptied while he slept and a bucket of fresh water to drink. It was still a cell and Anders still hated it. After spending so much time coming and going as he pleased this was nearly intolerable.

He had expected this though it didn’t make it any easier to deal with. The longest he’d spent in one of these cells at Kinloch Hold had been four days. There hadn’t been quite so much at stake back then either. All he could think of was whether or not Devin was all right. The bond was still intact but that only meant that Devin was alive. It was all he had and he clung to it.

For two days Anders paced, sat, slept and worried. When the door of the cell finally opened he was sitting against the wall, wrapped in the blankets because all dungeons were cold places. He hadn’t expected them to send someone he knew. His hair was a little greyer than Anders remembered but little else had changed about his oldest friend.

“Karl!” he exclaimed throwing the blankets off and scrambling to his feet.

“Oh Anders,” Karl said sadly as they embraced. “I had hoped the rumors weren’t true.”

“I have so much to tell you,” Anders whispered as he clung to the other man. “I’m pregnant.”

“Dear Maker,” Karl said in a sad frightened whisper. “How far along are you?”

“Around three months,” Anders said still keeping his voice low. There were likely Templars standing just outside the door and he didn’t want them to hear any of this conversation.

After a brief squeeze Karl pulled away enough so they could see each other. “It’s better if you tell the truth. There’s no way to hide it and lying to Knight-Commander Meredith is a very bad idea.”

“I have to Karl,” he whispered desperately. “My alpha is still alive.”

“Oh Anders,” said Karl pulling him close again. “This is going to be very hard on you. You need to be truthful about the baby but make something up when they ask about an alpha.”

“Why would that make it hard?” Anders asked. “I’m glad he’s alive.”

“We’ll talk later,” Karl said sympathetically as he pulled away. “Right now I need to get you ready to see the Knight-Commander. Put these on.”

Anders nodded and changed quickly into the robes Karl had brought with him. The slippers all mages were given instead of shoes or boots were a very welcome addition. It was only a thin layer of padding but it got his bare feet off of the cold stone floor. He hated the robes however. They were drab, ugly and after having gotten used to trousers, very drafty. It was just one more area that mages had no control over.

In the circle, mages were provided for. They didn’t have to worry about food, shelter, clothes or any of the other needs normal people worked for but there was precious little mages could choose for their selves. If you wanted an apple you had to be content with the oranges that were provided. To the poor and forgotten it might seem like paradise. Being told when and what to eat grew old quickly however. Anders knew it wouldn’t be easy for him to get used to this life again.

After he was dressed, Karl took him by the shoulders. His voice and face were very serious. “Do _not_ sass the Knight-Commander. She isn’t tolerant like Greagoir. The Templar you’ll get stuck with will most likely be one of hers. Are you ready?”

“No,” said Anders nervously. “From everything I’ve heard Meredith is a nightmare.”

“She is,” Karl said ominously. “Don’t do anything rash. Cullen and Thrask managed to get me as your guide so I’ll be right outside.”

Karl took his hand and smiled reassuringly as he knocked on the door. Anders was more nervous and frightened now than he had been the previous three times this had happened. Everything he’d heard about the Knight-Commander of the Gallows he didn’t like. Carver’s distaste for her was only making his fear worse.

The door was opened by Cullen. Anders hesitated long enough that Karl had to tug on his arm. Cullen stepped back and smiled as Karl led him out of the cell. The Knight-Captain led their little group with the red haired Templar following behind. Anders felt like he was on display as they made their way through the hallways. Mages and Templars alike stopped to stare as they walked by. It made him wonder what rumors were flying around about him. It was entirely possible that they knew he had been free of the circle for nearly two years.

When they arrived at Knight-Commander Meredith’s office, Cullen hesitated before knocking. He looked back at Anders and said quietly, “Answer quickly and truthfully. Don’t speak until spoken to.” Anders nodded and squeezed Karl’s hand as Cullen knocked on the door.

“Come in,” a muffled female voice said. Karl and the other Templar stayed outside and Anders reluctantly let go of Karl’s hand as he followed Cullen through the door.

She sat at a desk in the middle of the room, a file of papers open on the desk in front of her and her hands folded on top of the file. Meredith looked calmly up at Cullen. Her gaze was hard, the corners of her mouth pulled down in a perpetual frown and Anders shivered visibly when her cold stare was turned on him.

“This is Kinloch Hold’s troublesome Spirit Healer,” she said.

“Yes Knight-Commander,” Cullen said evenly.

“You are a Grey Warden?” Meredith asked.

“Yes, Ser,” said Anders managing not to stammer.

“No longer,” she said harshly. “You are a mage and belong in the circle. You are suspected in the deaths of two of Ferelden’s Templars. Your status as a Spirit Healer will not help you here. The Gallows is your home now and I do not tolerate the behavior you have displayed in Ferelden. If you attempt to escape again you will be made Tranquil. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, Ser,” said Anders in a frightened whisper.

“When is your next heat?”

“I…I don’t know…I…I’m pregnant,” he said haltingly, afraid to reveal the knowledge but understanding why Karl had counseled him to. Anders took an involuntary step backward as she shot to her feet. With her hands balled into fists on the desktop she leaned forward and turned a furious look on Cullen.

“Has the alpha been killed?” she asked with barely contained rage.

“The recruit who found Anders reported that he was alone. Since he isn’t plagued by the longing we can assume that the alpha was probably killed previous to my finding him in Darktown,” said Cullen his voice still surprisingly even.

“Is he correct?” she asked turning back to him.

Anders took another small step backwards and said, “Yes, Ser.” He hadn’t ever heard of something called the longing before and wondered if Karl had known. Suddenly, he was more worried than frightened.


	20. Chapter 20

“Until further notice Ser Karras will be your escort,” Knight-Commander Meredith said as she sat. “Take him to see First Enchanter Orsino.”

Her attention was back on the papers on her desk and Anders couldn’t get out of her office fast enough. Cullen saluted and followed, a tiny frown appearing as soon as his back was turned to her. When he was again in the hallway the red haired Templar was standing next to another Templar. This one was blonde with dark eyes and a long scruff of beard that began at the corners of his mouth. Karl looked worried and the red haired Templar didn’t look very pleased either.

Cullen took the red haired one aside and whispered something to him. The blonde smirked at him as Karl took his hand again. Anders assumed the new Templar was Karras and from Karl’s reaction, he had to be one of the worst. He leaned down a bit but Karl squeezed his hand and shook his head a fraction so Anders remained silent.

When Cullen finished speaking the redhead nodded and hurried off down the corridor. Cullen then knocked on a door directly across the hallway. After a moment a male voice sounded from inside and the Knight-Captain stepped through. Karl followed him and Anders stayed close to Karl. Karras leaned in the open doorway.

“First Enchanter Orsino,” said Cullen. “This is Anders. He is a Spirit Healer and he is pregnant. Ser Karras has been assigned as escort.”

The distinguished looking elf sitting at the desk sighed and nodded. He gestured at the two chairs in front of his desk and said, “Please have a seat. I see you are already acquainted with Enchanter Thekla.”

Anders moved his chair closer to the other before they both sat. He watched Knight-Captain Cullen turn toward the door and Ser Karras. Karl gave his hand another squeeze and he quickly turned his attention back to the First Enchanter. Orsino looked grimly at the Templars for a moment before turning a serious gaze on him.

“I cannot express enough how important it is for you to follow our rules,” he said with a quick glance at the Templars still standing in his doorway. “Karl has been assigned to help you…adjust…to life here in the Gallows. We’ll give you a week. After, I’d like you to help Bethany Hawke teach our youngest apprentices.”

“Teach?” Anders asked. “I’ve always been put in the infirmary.”

Orsino leaned over his desk and spoke quietly. “You’ll be much safer with the young ones.” There was another pointed look to the Templars in his doorway and Anders nodded his understanding. The First Enchanter leaned back and said in a louder tone, “Enchanter Thekla, I understand he was brought in peacefully but I’d like you to escort Anders to the infirmary anyway.”

“Of course First Enchanter,” said Karl.

They stood and Karl led him past Ser Karras. Cullen was standing at the end of the hallway, his back to them, speaking with Carver. Anders watched Carver salute his superior but before he left, Carver studied him and then frowned deeply at the Templar behind him. Cullen looked over his shoulder, also frowning before he left.

All this frowning over his escort made Anders more nervous. There was little time that day for any confiding or questioning. Most of his morning was spent in the infirmary being thoroughly examined. After the nervous healer pronounced both him and the baby perfectly healthy Karl led him to the cafeteria. Lunch was quiet and most of the evening was spent wandering around the Gallows until supper. Karl showed him where the most public places were, the library, a common room, the classrooms. He quietly pointed out the ‘safe’ Templars they ran across. Ser Karras followed quietly behind them but his presence made all of the mages nervous. By the time Karl finally led him to the room that would be his it was growing late.

Ser Karras stayed outside of his room but the door was left open. It was small and spare. A bed was pushed against the wall, a wardrobe that already contained clothes that were now his and a single chair that sat under a barred window. Karl sat in the chair and spoke of all the rules. Anders tried his best to listen but he knew most of them by heart. Anders didn’t dare ask the two questions he’d been holding in all day, not with Karras still standing just outside his door. Only when the Templar who would stand guard outside his door all night arrived and relieved Karras did Karl join him on the bed.

They were sitting closely together, hips and shoulders touching. Anders was finally allowed to ask about what had been plaguing him all day. “Karl what’s the longing?” he asked quietly but desperately.

“When a bonded alpha and omega is apart for a long period of time, they both have an irresistible urge to find each other,” said Karl just as quietly. “You must not do anything foolish.”

“How do you know about this?” said Anders. “How long will it take until I start feeling this?”

“Two or three weeks,” Karl said. He looked to the door and leaned closer. “I promise we’ll figure out how to help.”

Anders groaned quietly. They weren’t very far apart but he may as well have been on the moon. There was a very small chance of Anders being allowed into the courtyard but with his record Kirkwall itself would be forever beyond his reach. The six months he had predicted had been reduced to one. Even with Varric and Isabela’s help Devin would probably not be able to get him out that quickly.

“The Templars have always known about the longing,” Karl said bitterly. “They keep so much from us.”

“That’s why they kill our alpha’s…so we won’t escape to find them,” said Anders quietly, anger and despair warring for dominance in his voice.

Karl turned and pulled him into a hug. “Get some rest. My room is only three doors down.”

“Karl,” said Anders resting his head on his old friends shoulder. “Why does Ser Karras make everyone so nervous?”

“He’s violent,” Karl said. “It’s never been proven…but he’s a rapist. _Do not_ let him get you alone Anders.”

Anders closed his eyes and clung to Karl, wishing he were in the estate. Being followed around by a violent rapist was not his idea of safe. He’d be safer in the Deep Roads. At least he could feel the filth coming for him there. Reluctantly, he let Karl leave. Anders looked around the room once more and sat on the bed, lying down eventually. With blankets bunched under his head he hugged his pillow and stared at the door, wishing he were just about anywhere else.

His sleep had been late coming and what sleep he did get was broken by half-remembered nightmares. As a result he was already up and staring listlessly out of his window still wearing the robes that Karl had brought him the previous day. The knock on the door startled him from watching the merchants set up their stalls in the courtyard. Slowly he stood, rubbing his eyes as he made his way to the door. The sympathy he saw as Karl took in his rumpled, slept in robes only added to his misery.

He felt marginally better after a bath and a change of clothes. Determined to try and make the best of this awful situation, he tried not to think about what he’d lost or the Templar that was following him. As he followed Karl to the cafeteria, Anders decided to try and finish the task Devin had asked of him. Anything to keep his mind busy and off of the prison he was now living in.

Karl pointed out Bethany during breakfast that morning, promising to take him to the classroom to meet her and his future students after they ate. He found himself looking forward to meeting Bethany but wasn’t looking forward to actually teaching. After he had been harrowed Irving had put him in the infirmary and had kept him in there even after his escapes. Anders thought it was to keep him away from the apprentices as much as he could, wouldn’t want his bad habits to spread after all. Anders had no experience teaching and very little experience with children. He was more than a little worried about doing something that would get him or them in trouble.

She sat at a table with the children she taught. The youngest looked around seven and the oldest looked no older than twelve. Bethany looked much different from the young apprentice he remembered but there was a remarkable resemblance to both of her brothers. He wondered if he should tell her that the baby he carried was her kin. Anders shook his head slightly as he stirred honey into his bowl of porridge. The less people in here who knew about Devin the better, they would all be safer.

Learning his way around the Gallows was going to be a difficult task he thought as he followed Karl. Bethany and her charges had finished eating left earlier than they had. One corridor looked exactly the same as another to him. The only way he could see to tell any of them apart were how many doorways there were. Anders hoped that he could learn enough before Karl had to return to his duties. He would have to learn quickly if he wanted to avoid being alone with the Templar who followed quietly behind. Ser Karras definitely wouldn’t help him and he doubted many of the other mages would either.

Karl seemed to be the only mage in the Gallows willing to talk to him despite their obvious curiosity. The others didn’t leave a room when he stepped inside yesterday, but they kept their distance. Most often with nervous glances at his shadow and Anders couldn’t blame them for their skittishness. It would likely be lonely but he’d gotten used to that in Kirkwall. Before he’d met Devin Anders had gone out of his way to avoid people. Even after he’d met Devin the only people he associated with were Devin’s companions.

They arrived at one of the classrooms Karl had shown him yesterday. The door was open but Karl knocked on it anyway to get her attention. Bethany was sitting on the floor with the children arranged in a semicircle in front of her. She smiled at Karl and her gaze turned curious when Anders followed him into the room. There was a brief frown when Ser Karras leaned in the doorway as she stood. Her smile returned quickly however.

“Children,” she said gesturing at him. “This is Anders. He’s going to be joining us soon.”

Ten sets of eyes were suddenly trained on him and Anders gave them a strained smile and forced himself not to fidget. There were curious stares along with cautious glances to the doorway. Karl was no longer at his side and he looked over to see Bethany talking quietly to him not far away. Anders turned nervously back to the children.

Feeling a need to fill the uncomfortable silence he said, “Hello.”

“Why is your name Anders?” asked one of the older boys curiously. “Are you from the Anderfels?”

“It’s a nickname,” he said nervously. “I was born in the Anderfels but I’ve spent most of my life in Ferelden.”

“Do you know Miss Beth?” asked a girl who sat next to the boy who’d spoken first.

“What was it like in Ferelden?” another asked before she had finished.

Suddenly the room was full of questions and he took a nervous step closer to the door. Bethany appeared on one side of him and Karl on the other. While Bethany restored order Karl whispered in his ear. “Stay with Bethany and the children. I’ll be back in a little while.”

Karl squeezed his arm before making his way carefully past the frowning Templar in the doorway. Anders fought the urge to run after him, not wanting to be left with someone he barely knew and ten curious children he didn’t know at all, especially not with a dangerous Templar lurking in the doorway. Orsino had said he would be safer with the children but he didn’t honestly see how.

Anders jumped when Bethany touched his arm, earning him some stifled giggles from the children. She smiled warmly up at him and said quietly, “You’ll be all right.”

He closed his eyes and took a shuddering breath trying to force away the sudden longing he felt. Her eyes and the soothing reassurance in her voice reminded him of Devin. Anders nodded and smiled as he opened his eyes again, once more wishing he were just about anywhere else.


	21. Chapter 21

Anders stayed with them for a few hours that day. After the children had all introduced themselves, Anders had sat next to Bethany and observed them. She wasn’t just teaching them about their magic but about other things children normally learned about. Things like geography and history as well as simple spells.

This group of children was Bethany’s responsibility until right after lunch. The afternoon and evening they would be watched and taught by a different pair of mages. He wasn’t sure if Bethany needed help. It was clear that she enjoyed her duty and the children seemed to adore her as well. Anders mostly sat at the edge of their circle, feeling more like a stranger than ever as he watched them together.

He was aware of the curious glances sent his way from the children and Bethany. Since he wasn’t sure what the rumors were, he could only guess that it was his status as a captured apostate that made them so curious. Ser Karras, who never moved beyond the doorway, was also sent glances. His were nervous and frightened glances however. Anders thought he didn’t look very happy with his duty at the moment.

When Karl returned Anders gladly left with him. The children waved cheerily and Bethany smiled as she told him she’d seek him out later. He didn’t bother asking what Karl had been doing, not with Karras a few steps behind them. Anders insisted that Karl help him find his way around the maze of hallways. Getting lost would be a good way to end up alone with his Templar watchdog and he wanted to avoid that any way possible.

Bethany caught up with them after lunch and they ended up in the library. Sitting in a section that was meant for reading, the three of them sitting on a couch with Anders in the middle, there were a few other mages reading or looking through the shelves of books. The woman at the information desk introduced herself as Mharen. Anders noticed a few of the ‘safe’ Templars, one standing guard at the doorway and a few wandering among the bookcases. They all seemed to be keeping a watchful eye on Ser Karras, who reclined against the wall not far away.

“Are you really pregnant?” Bethany asked quietly. There was a disturbing mix of excitement and sorrow in her features.

Anders considered telling her about her relationship to the baby but decided against it again. He was sure Devin would come for him at some point but until he did, the less who knew about him the safer he was. “Yes,” said Anders just as quietly.

She took his hand and smiled sympathetically. “How far along?” she asked her voice now carrying a hint of sadness.

“Three months,” said Anders. He felt anger rising up within him and squashed it ruthlessly. New life should never be a cause for such sadness and sympathy. He had allowed himself cautious joy before being caught and still felt it. Devin wouldn’t allow the Chantry to take his child, Anders had to believe this. “What am I supposed to help you with?” he asked desperate for a change of conversation topic. “You seemed to be doing all right without me.”

“First Enchanter Orsino put you with Bethany and the children to keep you safe,” Karl said softly. “The children are watched almost constantly and harming one of them is something a Templar will actually get punished for.”

“We’ll figure out something,” Bethany said confidently.

Anders sighed as he was struck by another bout of heartache. According to Karl it took at least two weeks to be affected by the longing and it had only been three or four days. If Bethany was going to keep reminding him of Devin he wasn’t sure he wanted to be around her when those two weeks passed. This was definitely going to be more difficult than he had anticipated.

That night, when Karl sat with him until Karras was gone, Anders began telling Karl everything that had happened to him since his last escape. Karl wouldn’t say where he’d gone that morning but he left Anders with Bethany for an hour the next day as well. The week he’d been allowed to adjust passed by altogether too quickly in this manner. He had only gotten about halfway through his tale but Karl promised to keep coming by at night.

He found sleeping difficult. It was then he missed Devin the most. Anders hadn’t realized how quickly he’d gotten used to Devin beside him. His warmth, quiet conversations, even the sound of his breathing when he woke from a dream and Anders hated that he now slept alone. Sometimes during long nights of broken sleep, he wished that he could feel the part of Devin that grew inside of him. Perhaps he wouldn’t feel quite so alone.

In the mornings, before the day truly began, he sat in his chair by the window. He watched the Templars and merchants in the courtyard going about their business in the early dawn light. It was now the first day of the second week and he sat in his nightshirt staring out the window, rubbing the tiny curve of his abdomen. No one else would notice. The robes he had been provided with would make sure of that. Anders wouldn’t tell anyone either. The only person he truly wanted to tell was inaccessible.

That morning he lingered at the window longer than he should have. Anders sighed heavily as he stood, still looking out of the window. Slowly he turned to make his way to the bathing chamber when he saw movement in a place where there was usually none. Anders turned back to the window curiously and bit his lip to keep silent when Devin materialized out of the shadows of the overhanging section directly in front of his window.

Anders gripped the bars and leaned forward, watching him intently. There was no mistaking him, he leaned on a pillar and it seemed that he was looking directly at Anders. Devin touched the corner of his eye and then placed his hand on his chest.

“Yes,” Anders whispered. “Yes I see you.”

Devin’s gaze grew unfocused for a moment then he grinned up at Anders. He could see the relief wash over him even from his second floor room. There was another brief moment where he seemed to be listening to something only he could hear and when his gaze cleared again, Devin’s grin had changed to the smirk he so often wore. He patted his stomach and then held his fingers apart a fraction.

“Yes,” whispered Anders again. He smiled moving one hand to his own stomach. “Just a little.” There was a rattling of armor at his door, which could only mean that Ser Karras was now standing outside of it. Anders turned fearfully to his door but quickly looked back down at Devin. His smirk had changed to a frown in that short space of time. “Come back earlier tomorrow,” he whispered desperately.

Precious seconds passed and Devin nodded. He faded back into the shadows as suddenly as he had appeared. Anders took a few more seconds to compose his emotions, making sure none of the hope he felt showed, and then grabbed a clean set of robes to wear. He then hurried out of his room, skirting the Templar who stood at his door, to the bathing chamber. There were still a few people in here and Ser Karras stopped at the door like he normally did.

If they were close enough that Justice could communicate with him, then perhaps they were close enough that the longing wouldn’t affect them. He hurried through his bath and dressed quickly, following the other mages who were also running behind. Karl was standing just outside of the double doors of the cafeteria. He looked relieved to see Anders hurrying up the hallway.

“Anders, Thank the Maker,” said Karl. “I was beginning to worry.”

“Am I supposed to sit with Bethany and the children?” Anders asked quietly.

“Yes,” Karl said falling in beside him. “I’ll see you at lunch, hurry.”

Anders nodded and walked quickly over to the table. He sat next to Bethany and she looked relieved to see him as well. “Are you all right?” she asked quietly.

“Fine,” said Anders smiling. He filled his plate with what remained of their breakfast and ate quickly. Anders was aware of her scrutiny but he was just so happy to have seen Devin. With him locked away in the Gallows and watched almost everywhere, it was more than he had hoped for. The thought of seeing him again tomorrow morning made his stomach flutter in excitement.

Anders was the last to finish. With their dirty dishes taken to the return table the children led the way to the classroom. They walked in a loose group, talking quietly among themselves with Anders and Bethany following them. Ser Karras trailed behind and his presence was enough for Anders to remember not to show the hope and excitement that he felt.

Bethany wasn’t fooled however. She glanced behind them and put her arm around his, pulling him closer so that they were walking very close. Her voice was little more than a whisper when she spoke. “You seem happier.”

“Do you remember your brothers?” he asked his voice also little more than a whisper.

She looked puzzled but nodded as she said, “Vaguely.”

“They’re here, in Kirkwall,” said Anders. “They fled the blight in Ferelden, came here looking for you. Carver is a Templar here in the Gallows. I see him sometimes…I think he checks on me.”

“Carver…here…,” she said slowly. “Why would he be watching you? Why haven’t I seen him?”

“To let Devin know that I’m okay,” whispered Anders looking down at her. “I’m not sure why you haven’t seen Carver. They might suspect…keep you apart on purpose.”

He was quiet and hoped she would understand. It had taken him most of the week to decide that Bethany deserved to know, to decide that she wouldn’t turn Devin in. He didn’t like being suspicious of her, in a way she was family. But she had also spent most of her life in the circle. Anders knew that not all mages felt the way he did. It had been a hard lesson that day in the Denerim market when a mage had willingly pointed him out for the Templars that were searching for him.

Her eyes grew wide as she thought. “Oh! You mean…” she started. Bethany snapped her mouth shut and glanced behind them again.

“He came looking for you…” said Anders very softly, resting his hand on the tiny bulge of his belly. “But he found me first.”


	22. Chapter 22

It was after lunch and they were sitting in the library before Bethany had a chance to talk with him. Anders had seen Karl briefly at lunch and he had promised to meet him before bedtime. They sat next to one another, so closely that she was almost in his lap. She took his hands in both of hers and pulled him down slightly so that their foreheads touched.

“Are you saying that my older brother was your alpha?” she whispered her voice barely audible.

“Is,” Anders said squeezing her hands lightly, his voice also barely audible. “He’s still alive.”

“That means your baby…oh Anders they’ll take it away!”

Anders kissed her softly on the lips, continuing the illusion she had created. “Devin won’t let them take my baby,” he said smiling.

“Is he planning something?” she asked wrapping her arms around him and resting her head on his shoulder.

“Probably,” Anders said holding her as well. “Before Cullen spotted me he was working on a plan to get you out.”

She was silent for a while and Anders rested his cheek on top of her head. “What’s it like?” she asked finally. “Out there?”

“Frightening,” he whispered. “You have to worry about everyone finding out. But it’s also wonderful. You can wear what you want…eat when you feel like it, even at midnight and there are no Templars to order you to bed. No one constantly watching everything you do. When _you_ find an alpha…you won’t have to hide. There won’t be any danger. People will be happy and celebrate…they won’t question whether or not you’re a mage.”

“I’m sorry Anders,” she said miserably. “Even here no one’s happy for you.”

He closed his eyes for a moment and they held each other until she looked up at him. Her lips were curved up in a small smile, her kind eyes shining wetly and she said softly, “I’ll be happy for you though. If he’s anything like the boy I remember…you’re right. He’ll get us out of the Gallows.”

After a long day of searching the library with Bethany, Karl walked with him to his room after supper. Anders continued telling him of what he’d lived through outside the circle. He waited eagerly at the window after a sleepless night full of anticipation. Devin appeared in the same spot he had the previous morning. Anders left that morning happy and frustrated.

Justice could communicate with Devin. His whispered words and thoughts carried by the spirit through their bond. It didn’t work the other way around. Anders didn’t really communicate with Justice since they were the same being. It would have been like trying to talk to his heart or his lungs. Most of the time he was unaware of the spirit, simple feelings or a strong sense of right and wrong, unless he specifically asked for help.

The only way Devin could communicate with him was the hand gestures. It was like playing a game and he had always been terrible at games. Even though it was frustrating, Anders was also glad just to see him. They didn’t have to rely on Carver or messages that could be intercepted for Devin to know that he was safe.

Days ran together with boring repetition. Bethany continued to help him in the afternoons as he continued trying to find the origins of the circle. Karl usually escorted him back to his room after supper where they continued their quiet conversation. When Anders told him of what he and Devin had discovered Karl had been horrified but excited. Anders found out why the very next night.

Not all of the mages bonded with Templars here in the Gallows had been accidental. It wasn’t engineered rape as Anders had assumed, but carefully crafted incidents. It had begun long ago, previous to the sixty years he had examined in the journal, when a bonded couple was studied. Benefits were found for both alpha and omega. The Knight-Commander at the time had dismissed the findings but a few of the higher ranking Templars didn’t. A secret society was born that included both mages and Templars.

This group had taken it upon themselves to seek out couples. Mages and Templars who were very much like Devin and himself. Accidents were carefully created so that they could bond. The children were always taken away, but both of them were happier overall despite that. This was why there was such a strong division among the Templars here at the Gallows when there hadn’t been at Kinloch Hold. Most of the safe Templars, who were also alphas, were bonded with a mage like Thrask and Emeric. Even a few of the alpha recruits were bonded.

Anders had felt like laughing. By trying to make the mages happier, to utilize the benefits both alpha and omega gained with the bond, this group had inadvertently set about solving the problem Anders had discovered at Vigil’s Keep. Karl and Bethany had been transferred to the Kirkwall circle because their talents were needed but it had been Karl’s keen mind that had set Anders on the path he now traveled. He had been made a member of this group only a month after arriving. They had told him of the longing, they had set Karl to watch him and they had also set a Templar member of their group to watch Carver.

Ser Thrask, the red haired Templar he’d seen often, was the Templar authority of this underground group, not Cullen. The Knight-Captain was a wild card. He had done much to curb Meredith’s almost underhanded tactics but no one was sure which side he truly stood on. Perhaps he was one of the deluded ones that Devin had mentioned. Anders assured him that Carver was safe and had explained the details of his capture. All of this information had excited Devin.

Three more weeks had passed before Anders began to feel the longing. It was a pull he felt in the mornings as he stared down at Devin. He wanted to smash the glass and melt the bars that separated them. From the way Devin had begun clinging to the pillar he normally leaned on Anders knew that he felt that same pull. Their proximity had only delayed it.

It grew infinitely worse as another week dragged mercilessly by. Karl and Bethany were both worried about him. Concentrating on anything was a near impossible task. Anders was positive it was the baby that kept him from storming out through the doors. The tiny bulge had grown and it was now obvious to everyone in the Gallows that he was pregnant. Others might assume that he was simply gaining weight. He had even begun feeling it, more and more often as it grew. There had been no one to share that with. Devin had looked wistful the next morning.

He sat on his bed, moonlight streaming through his window, arms across his belly. Anders fought the pull he felt. Tranquility would probably not affect the baby or his ability to care for it, but he would feel nothing. Meredith had been deadly serious with her threat. He knew that Ser Karras was suspicious but there was nothing he could do.

Anders felt that pull suddenly worsen and he was on his feet standing by his bed, his arms still wrapped around his belly, before he could stop himself. He watched as his door opened just enough to allow a shadowed figure through and it was shut again. Taking a step forward, he whimpered and then rushed to the man standing in his room.

“Hello little rabbit,” Devin said brokenly as their arms enfolded one another. “Brave, foolish, wonderful little rabbit.”

“What are you doing here,” asked Anders as he clung desperately to him.

“Keeping us thinking properly,” Devin said quietly. “Your friend Karl is a jewel. Between him and Carver they managed to sneak me in.”

“Does that mean you can’t get me out?” Anders said feeling despair settle over him like a blanket.

“Not yet,” said Devin calmly. “Don’t worry Anders it shouldn’t be too much longer.”

“Please Devin,” Anders begged. “I hate it here.”

“Shh, I know,” he soothed rubbing circles on his back with one hand and carding his fingers through Anders’ hair with the other. “I don’t like you being here either. Let’s go sit, Carver’s standing watch at your door and I have a lot to tell you.”

Anders reluctantly released him and Devin stroked down his cheek with the back of his hand. Devin led him to the bed where he sat leaning against the wall. Anders sat with his legs crossed, his back to Devin’s chest, resting his head on Devin’s shoulder. With his hands resting on Anders’ belly, rubbing lightly over the gentle curve, he began speaking.

“It took both of them to pin me down,” he said quietly. “A prisoner in the estate until Varric and Isabela could calm me, made me see that it was the only way. Fenris made me so angry…said I was better off…and he knew. The bastard knew about the longing…said he’d make sure I got through it.”

“Did you know about it?” asked Anders despondently.

“Of course I knew,” Devin said evenly. “Why else do you think I’d take you to such a dangerous place like the Deep Roads?”

“I thought it was because I’m a Grey Warden,” he said resting his hands on Devin’s thighs.

“I know you can fight but I wouldn’t risk you or the baby unless it was absolutely necessary,” said Devin fervently. Anders was unsure what to say so he remained silent. He let Devin’s presence comfort him. All the things he’d missed, his warmth, his restless fingers now tracing patterns on his belly, the soothing rumble of his quiet voice. “I know what they’re scared of now little rabbit. Between you and Carver…I’ve never been more proud of Carver. He cold cocked Fenris.”

“What?” Anders said incredulously half turning to see Devin smirking with a cheerful glint in his eyes.

“Fenris kept going on and on about how much better off we were without that viper in our midst. He simply refused to believe that you let Carver take you in to save me. Said you’d done it to torment me, even though it’s just as much of a torment for you. I pointed that out to him and he said that your demon would protect you.”

“Spirit,” Anders muttered irritably as he settled back to their previous position.

Devin laughed softly before continuing. “Carver surprised everyone. He was livid, shoved Fenris a few times while he ranted about your noble sacrifice and then before anyone could even say anything he had the elf flat on his arse rubbing his jaw.”

“How did Carver avoid a fist in his chest?” asked Anders curiously. “I can’t imagine Fenris just letting someone push him around like that.”

“Shock,” Devin said simply. “Carver’s beta, none of this affects him personally in any way…except it does. He’s been surrounded by alphas and omegas all of his life. It affects him because it affects the people he cares about.”

“Still…he was pretty lucky.”

“Definitely,” Devin said earnestly. “It was a beautiful punch.” His voice had gained a note of pride but it was gone when Devin continued. “It was enough to convince Fenris that you truly cared and he finally opened up. Maker…Tevinter is horrible Anders. Mages rule…there, alphas are hunted ruthlessly and caged. Magisters choose their alphas based on obedience. The more docile the alpha is the better, blood magic is common…used openly without fear. He was bonded to his master. You can’t imagine the things he was put through by that mage.”

“How did he end up here?” asked Anders shivering slightly.

“Snapped…he’d had enough. Fenris used the power of those markings of his to kill him then fled Tevinter. While I was listening to Fenris talk of Tevinter now…everything suddenly made sense. Andraste pushed them out of most of Thedas, but the people remembered. They had to have been so scared of mages that the ones born after were abused and probably killed. The circle may have started as a way to actually protect innocent children who’d done nothing wrong.”

“That’s not the way it is now,” Anders said thoughtfully. Devin was right, as usual. It did make sense. Thedas went from one extreme to the other. What the Chantry did to omegas now was just as wrong as what Tevinter did to alphas. “The Dalish have the right idea.”

“I think so too,” said Devin as his hands settled on Anders’ belly. “That’s why we’re going to free as many mages from the Gallows as we can. Find someplace where we can start our own little community. I’ve been making plans with that Templar Thrask and your friend Karl. There’s a way out of the Gallows that leads to Darktown and from there we can get to the docks quickly. I just have to help Isabela with a little problem and she’ll guarantee all of us safe passage to where ever we want to go.”

“We’ll need a lot of the heat suppressant,” said Anders seriously. “Unbonded mages should have the chance that we had. To find a partner and not have to hope the first alpha that gets to them isn’t someone they can’t stand.”

“Give me the ingredients and instructions and I’ll get someone working on it,” Devin said. “Oh…was that…”

“Yes,” said Anders finally smiling. “That’s our baby.”


	23. Chapter 23

“Just a little longer,” Devin said placing a gentle kiss on his forehead. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Anders nodded, frowning, and reluctantly let him go. There was no pull, no urge to follow him beyond the ache that had settled in his chest when he’d realized that the Gallows would be his home for a while. It was near dawn and even though he was very tired, he still sat beside his window to wait. After a while he stood to go to the baths while Carver was still standing outside of his door.

“Thank you,” he murmured as he passed.

Carver nodded slightly but remained quiet as he followed Anders. He stayed there longer than usual before drying himself and dressing. Ser Karras was standing at the door like he had expected and Anders hurried past him, hoping the Templar wouldn’t notice anything different. It was a vain hope.

Karl and Bethany were both relieved to see him calmer. He no longer tapped his foot constantly or stared longingly at the nearest exit. Anders was very careful to stay to the public areas, where there were mages and safe Templars. Karras had been suspicious before but now he looked like a dull child trying to puzzle out a difficult riddle. Four days after his night with Devin, he came out of the baths and Anders knew that Karras had finally solved that riddle. His knowing smirk and the vicious cast to his eyes was very frightening.

Anders hurried down the hallway, wanting the safety of the cafeteria. The clanking armor behind him was closer than ever before and he walked quicker. The mages in front of him turned a corner and he wasn’t entirely surprised when he felt a gauntleted hand around his arm. He felt the holy smite a second later and was dragged into a deserted room, reeling from the unnecessary attack. He was pushed roughly up against the wall, managing to turn his head to the side. Karras had one of his arms wrenched behind him and the other was trapped between his chest and the wall. He used it to push back, trying to keep some space between his belly and the wall.

“You lied,” said Karras softly close to his ear. “Your alpha isn’t dead.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” said Anders wincing at the pain in his shoulder. “I’ve done nothing wrong.”

“Knight-Commander’s going to be furious,” he said with sadistic glee. “Caught the apostate lying. Who let your alpha in?” Anders said nothing. “Talk mage,” Karras growled as he forced Anders arm further up his back.

Anders screamed as he felt something in his shoulder pop. Suddenly the pressure on his arm was gone and there was a great crashing noise behind him. He pushed himself away from the wall, turning to the sounds of a fight. He backed away toward the door and watched in disbelief as Carver grappled with Karras on the floor not far away. Another Templar rushed past him and Karl appeared at his side. “Are you all right Anders?” Karl asked gripping his arms tightly.

He gasped as pain flared through his shoulder. “Something in my shoulder,” Anders said shakily holding his arm still with the other. A few more Templars rushed into the room and Karl stood with him as they watched them pull Carver off of Karras. There was a crowd of mages beginning to form outside, Bethany and the children at the front. Knight-Captain Cullen made his way through and stood partially blocking the doorway.

“Run along,” he said sternly. “I’m sure all of you have something to be doing.”

Most of the mages scattered but Bethany lingered. “Ser Cullen,” she said nervously. “Is Anders all right?” The children crowded around her fearfully.

He looked over his shoulder for a second and said, “He’ll be sent to the infirmary but he looks fine.” Cullen made a shooing gesture at her. After a last look around him, she finally led the children off. Cullen turned and Anders glared at him, still feeling a bit woozy.

“I was safer in Darktown,” he said accusingly.

“Anders,” Karl hissed in warning.

Cullen frowned as he said steadily, “Enchanter Thekla, will you please escort Anders to the infirmary. I’ll be there shortly.”

“Yes Knight-Captain,” Karl said.

Before Anders was led out the door he turned to find Carver. He was staring out the door where Bethany had been. It was mid-morning before Cullen actually arrived at the infirmary. His shoulder had been popped back into place and then healed. He was cautioned against lifting heavy objects for a while. After that he was given another thorough examination and pronounced fine.

Karl sat with him until the Knight-Captain actually showed up. There was enough time to tell him of what happened before Cullen dismissed him. Anders relayed his version of events again and waited with his hands clasped together in his lap.

“That matches what recruit Hawke told me,” he said thoughtfully. “Is there any truth to Ser Karras’ accusations?”

Anders remained silent, steadily meeting the Templars gaze as he loomed over him. He knew his silence would be taken for assent but he didn’t really care. If this unprovoked attack didn’t convince Cullen that mages weren’t safe in the circle then nothing would.

“Anders…” Cullen began as he sat next to him on the bed.

“I’ve followed your damn rules,” he interrupted scooting away from the Templar. “I did nothing to warrant being smote and shoved up against the wall. What else might have happened if Carver hadn’t seen him yank me into that room?”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Cullen asked quietly staring intently at the floor. “I’m only trying to protect you.”

“What would you have done?” Anders said coolly. Cullen’s silence was as telling as his own had been. “May I go now _Ser_?”

“Ser Thrask is waiting for you just outside,” said Cullen. “He will be your escort.”

Anders stood and walked calmly towards the door without looking back. Ser Thrask was standing just outside the door to the infirmary but he passed the Templar without sparing a glance. He hurried to the classroom where Bethany and the children were. They were in their little circle on the floor when he stepped inside. There was mostly a strange mix of relief and fright among them. Bethany sighed audibly in relief when Thrask appeared in the doorway instead of Karras.

“Good morning Ser Thrask,” she said. “Are you Anders’ escort now?”

“Good morning Miss Hawke,” he said smiling as Anders sat. “I am.”

“Are you all right Anders?” Bethany asked turning to him.

“Fine,” he said with a strained smile. “Let’s carry on.”

For the rest of the day Anders followed his normal routine. Having missed breakfast he ate more at lunch than usual. In the library he finally told Bethany what had happened, both with Karras and Cullen in the infirmary, then refused to discuss it further. At supper, it was Bethany who told Karl what had happened in the infirmary. Neither of them seemed very worried that Cullen knew Anders was still bonded. Ser Thrask was his silent companion for the rest of the day. The other mages acted much differently towards him without Karras. They were curious and most of them friendly. Anders did his best to be polite at least. He wasn’t really in any sort of mood for such opposite behavior from them. None of them would have lifted a finger to help him this morning. They had hardly spoken to him for the entire time he’d been here. That he understood why only made his mood worse.

After supper Karl normally walked him back to his room. Today there was a quiet apology and reassurances that he would be safe with Thrask. Anders didn’t mind this little deviation. Karl was likely going to pass on the information he’d been told and he hoped there would be a warning sent to Devin through whatever means they had been communicating.

His anger had faded throughout the day, leaving him tired and frustrated. He was more than ready to fall into his lonely bed and hope that he could actually sleep well. The Templar at his door had other plans it seemed. Thrask, instead of standing next to his door, was leaning on the frame just inside.

“He’s a fascinating young man,” Ser Thrask said quietly.

Anders sighed as he pulled a nightshirt from his wardrobe and then sat on his bed. “Cullen knows,” he said setting it beside him.

“I believe he’s suspected from the beginning,” said Thrask.

“Is he safe?” Anders asked softly.

“I’m sure Karl has already sent word to him. About all of today’s happenings,” answered Thrask. “Are you all right?”

“Just a little sore,” said Anders rubbing his arm. “He’s not going to be happy.”

“No, he will definitely not be happy,” he said leaning forward a bit to grab the door handle. “Carver Hawke will be guarding your door tonight. Get some rest, things will be moving forward quickly now.”

Thrask shut the door gently and Anders continued to stare at it. Things couldn’t move quickly enough.


	24. Chapter 24

The next morning, Devin was strangely absent. Anders waited for a bit but the rogue didn’t show. He stepped outside of his room, clean robes in hand, and paused standing next to Carver. His extreme worry must have shown because Carver gripped his shoulder for a moment.

“He’s not here,” Anders whispered.

“Don’t panic,” Carver said softly. “I’m sure he’s fine. Off to the baths, there’s nothing wrong.”

Anders nodded trying to mask his worry. The bond was intact so Devin was alive at the very least. Scenarios ran through his head, each new one worse than the last. By the time he reached the cafeteria for breakfast he was very close to panicking anyway. Karl, who usually waited for him just outside the cafeteria, hurried up to him before Anders was even very close.

“He’s all right,” Karl said softly. “I got a message from him last night. He said he’s got some arrangements to make and would be out of Kirkwall for a couple of days.”

“Are you sure?” asked Anders not feeling very reassured.

“Relax,” said Karl taking his hand and pulling him toward the cafeteria. “Even if they do suspect you have an alpha they have no way of knowing who.”

“Karl, we weren’t exactly secretive. There are lots of people who can place us together in a lot of different places if they just ask around,” he said anxiously.

“And there’s no way they could have done it so fast,” Karl said soothingly.

Anders nodded unhappily and tried not to look quite so worried at least. The rest of that day passed and Devin was gone the next morning as well as the one after that. He was becoming extremely worried. Devin was alive but the thoughts of him captured and tortured popped into his mind constantly. Karl and Bethany did their best to keep him calm and even Thrask was starting to look worried about him.

On that third day after Karras had attacked him, Ser Thrask pulled him and Bethany aside after lunch on their way to the library. When they were safe behind a closed door, he spoke quickly and quietly. “Hawke wants you two out of here but we’re not quite ready to put our plan in action yet. Carver will escort you both through the tunnels tonight and from there Hawke has instructed you three to head up Sundermount.”

“Wait, both of us?” Bethany asked sounding frightened.

“You’re close to Anders,” Thrask explained patiently. “It’s possible for you to become a target for the others in lieu of him. Carver has also come under suspicion from the Knight-Commander.”

“Why Sundermount?” she asked sounding more frightened than she was before.

“The Dalish,” Anders said quietly putting an arm around her shoulders. “That’s why he hasn’t been in Kirkwall.”

“What about the children? I can’t just leave the children,” she said desperately.

“Karl has volunteered to take over your duties with the children,” Thrask said steadily. “I agree with Hawke. There are far too few of us to watch the three of you consistently. You’ll be much safer out there.”

“We’ll be fine Bethany,” said Anders trying to sound reassuring. “Both Carver and I have been to Sundermount.”

“You don’t sound very confident,” she said in a small worried voice.

“I wasn’t nearly six months along with no staff and wearing a dress that last time Devin and I climbed Sundermount,” he said wryly. “At least I know what he’s been doing now.”

“Your brother will be with you,” Thrask said comfortingly. “Go about the rest of your day normally but after supper both of you need to wait in Anders’ room. Here.” Thrask held out a vial to Bethany. “We’re hoping it won’t take more than another couple of weeks but…just in case.”

Bethany hesitantly reached for the heat suppressant and held onto it tightly. She put it in her pocket and nodded. Anders could tell that she was still frightened. He was honestly a little frightened as well. There were always so many things that could go wrong during an escape and there was more at stake this time than a simple slap on the wrist.

The rest of the day was spent trying to be comforting and reassuring for Bethany’s sake. Anders insisted on a nap after supper as they would likely be up most of the night trying to reach the safety of Merrill and the Dalish. Since finding clothes for him would be difficult he folded a couple of extra robes neatly and stuffed them down the set he was wearing. He settled them in the extra material around his belly, being held in place by the low belt around the bottom of it.

They were both dozing when Carver entered his room. Bethany was leaning against his shoulder, both of them sitting on his bed against the wall. The door woke him immediately and he shook her slightly. Carver wasn’t wearing his armor, only the simple trousers and sleeveless white shirt Anders had met him in. His sword was strapped firmly in place on his back and he waved them over.

Anders held onto Bethany’s hand as they closed the small amount of space. Carver held a finger to his lips and turned after a brief look at his sister. The door was opened and he peaked out before leading them out. They followed him silently through deserted corridors and stairs that led them past the solitary cells and out through a hidden entrance.

The caves they entered were dark. Torches had been pressed into cracks and makeshift stands every so often along the way before the caves opened up into a naturally lit cavern. Strange plants lined the walls, crates were scattered around haphazardly and Carver led them through to a set of stairs on the other side. He frowned as they climbed the stairs.

“Where’s Devin,” Carver said quietly to himself. “He was supposed to meet us here.”

“Carver,” Anders said softly. “Where are we?”

“Darktown’s just through there. We keep going,” he said turning slightly. “Devin probably just got held up or something.”

When they reached the top, Carver looked through another pile of crates and came up with a backpack and his staff. The backpack he held out to Bethany and Anders took his staff with a smile. She tentatively reached for the pack, the twins staring intently at each other. Bethany stepped forward suddenly and wrapped her arms around him.

“I remember you,” she said her voice shaky and full of emotion. “You always pulled my pigtails.”

Carver patted her back awkwardly. “Bethany…we should get moving,” he said hesitantly. “We can…talk later.”

“What was Devin doing?” Anders asked feeling slightly worried about him again.

“He said something about returning something,” said Carver as Bethany pulled away from him. “I think it has something to do with Isabela’s problem. Be careful going up this ladder, Devin will kill me if you get hurt.”

He turned and began climbing the ladder, Bethany following closely behind him. Anders was the last through the trapdoor and heard Carver swear quietly. Bethany helped him up and out and he immediately saw the reason for Carver’s foul language. Their little corner was dark and deserted but there were people crowding Darktown’s alleys, far more than there should have been.

“Carver what…” said Anders in confusion.

“I don’t know,” he answered curtly. “I’ve been asleep most of the day. Do you know the quickest way through this mess?”

“The cellars of the estate,” Anders said after a moment of thought. “There’s an entrance right outside my clinic and I don’t think we’re that far away.”

“Stay close and try not to attract any attention,” Carver said. “We can’t exactly hide you and I’d rather not have to fight half of Kirkwall to get you out.”

Anders frowned as he followed, holding onto Bethany’s hand with his left and his staff with the other. Most of the people milling about Darktown that normally didn’t belong there, didn’t give them a second glance. Anders was wary of them anyway. There was no way to hide his belly and at this point, it probably wouldn’t be taken for overindulgence at the dinner table.

They made it to his clinic without incident. The doors were still shut and he couldn’t help but wonder if it looked as he’d left it. There was no sign of his pack but it was likely that Devin had found it along with his staff. Carver led them straight to the door that led to the cellar of the estate and promptly began swearing again.

“I don’t suppose you have a key?” he asked irritably.

“No Carver,” said Anders equally annoyed. “They took it along with everything else I had on me. Break it open. I’m sure Devin will understand. We can push something heavy against it from the other side to keep it shut.”

“Right, stupid question,” Carver grumbled. “Where’s the damn thief when you need him.”

“Probably caught up in whatever’s going on up there,” Bethany said. “I can open it if you like…I’m a decent force mage.”

“Hurry,” Carver said turning to watch the stairway.

Anders moved closer to Carver, trying to block her from any wandering eyes. She stood in front of the door and took a deep breath. A small controlled force push later the door was standing open. Anders motioned her inside and he lightly touched Carver’s arm, getting his attention, before following. When they were inside, Anders and Bethany waited while Carver pushed a few of the heavier objects against the door.

Up the stairs and through another door Anders was very familiar with and they were in the estate. They followed Carver to the main entryway. It didn’t look like much had changed inside the estate, with the exception of the missing dwarves who were normally in the large foyer. Straight through to the front door, Carver opened it cautiously.

Hightown was eerily deserted. Smoke could be seen rising from the docks and Lowtown. The further away from the estate they were, the more nervous Anders became. There were very few people as they made their way carefully to the gate that would lead them to Sundermount. Most individuals they saw were in a hurry to be somewhere else. Anders could hear the clash of steel occasionally, Carver must have heard it too because he always led them away from it.

They rounded a corner and the gate was in sight but it was tightly shut. That was the least of their problems. As they ran into the little courtyard four Templars ran noisily into the same area from a different entrance. Carver slowly came to a stop and drew his sword, standing partially in front of him. Anders let go of Bethany’s hand and settled into a ready position with Bethany hiding behind him.

Two of the Templars wore helmets but the other two were without. Knight-Captain Cullen stepped forward, his hand outstretched in a peaceful gesture. The other three spread out behind him, no doubt trying to circle them. Anders watched the other helmetless Templar with something close to hate. Ser Karras wouldn’t get another chance to hurt another mage ever again.


	25. Chapter 25

“Let us go Cullen,” Anders said evenly.

“Recruit Hawke,” the Knight-Captain said glancing at Anders. “Where are you going with these mages?”

“Away from Kirkwall,” Carver said shortly.

“They belong in the Gallows,” Karras sneered.

“So you can have another go?” said Carver caustically. “I don’t think so.”

“What about your duty Carver?” Cullen asked quietly taking another step forward.

“No closer,” warned Carver.

“We’re not going back,” said Anders boldly.

“Yes you are,” Karras growled.

Chaos briefly broke out in the small courtyard. Karras and one of the faceless Templars drew their weapons and started forward. Cullen shouted for them to stop as Carver set himself to face the attack. Anders growled and threw lightening at the advancing Templars seconds before the silence settled over him. An arrow sprouted suddenly from the eye slit of the Templar as the lightening arced between him and Karras. A familiar dagger appeared in his throat and Karras fell forward, the clanging of his armor loud in the sudden silence.

Cullen took a step backwards, his hand on his sheathed weapon as another group of people casually entered the courtyard. Devin, with Varric, Isabela, Fenris, and surprisingly Sebastian following him, held his other dagger. Varric and Sebastian both had their weapons trained on the two Templars left.

“I wouldn’t,” said Devin his voice friendly. “They’re excellent marksmen.”

“Hawke,” Cullen said cautiously as he slowly lowered his arm. His gaze shifted from Devin to Carver then from Carver to Anders. Finally to Bethany, peeking around from behind his shoulder and a look of understanding settled on his face. “I see,” he said slowly.

“Do you?” Devin asked as he crossed between them to where Karras lay. He knelt and rolled him enough to extract his dagger, wiping it clean on the Templar’s skirts before standing. “Can you tell me why this mage was attacked?” He pointed to Anders with his arm outstretched, his dagger glinting dangerously in the moonlight. “By the very people who claim to protect him?”

“That was dealt with,” Cullen said sounding the tiniest bit unsure.

“No it wasn’t,” Carver said angrily. “Meredith didn’t even look at him. I got reprimanded for starting a fight.”

Knight-Captain Cullen looked from one to the other. Devin smiled dangerously and lowered his arm. “I don’t care for that sort of protection,” he said taking a step closer to Anders.

“I don’t either actually,” Cullen said softly.

“How many others are there like him?” Devin asked gesturing to the body at his feet. After a brief moment of silence Devin moved to stand next to his brother. “You don’t protect them and you’re not getting these two back.”

Cullen closed his eyes for a moment then looked to Sebastian. “Why do you stand with him Brother Sebastian?”

“I owe him,” Sebastian said evenly. “There are things that have been hidden from us Knight-Captain.”

“Speak with Thrask,” Anders said. “If you care for us at all.”

He nodded once then turned to the exit Devin had entered from. Cullen walked away calmly, without looking back or speaking again. The other Templar followed after him quickly. When they had disappeared into the night Devin sheathed his daggers and turned to Anders. His smile turned warm as he brushed a lock of hair behind his ear.

“Are you all right?” he asked quietly.

“Fine,” said Anders pulling him into a slightly awkward embrace. “Please say you’re coming with.”

“Sadly I can’t,” Devin said pulling away as he turned to Fenris. “Get those doors open.” Fenris and Carver both headed for the gate mechanism.

“Devin?” Bethany said hesitantly as she stepped around him.

“Bethany,” said Devin. The gates creaked open behind him and Devin turned for a second. “I promise I’ll be there as soon as I can. I’ve got something to take care of here first. Isabela can explain on the way.”

“Hawke!” Isabela exclaimed irritably.

“I’m not going to risk losing our way out of this wretched city,” Devin said. “We’ve been over this and you’re going to the Dalish camp.” Isabela rolled her eyes but joined Carver at the gate while Fenris moved to stand behind Devin.

“We should hurry,” he said crossing his arms over his chest. He briefly looked over Bethany and she scooted a bit closer to Anders nervously.

“I’ll be over in a second,” said Devin. “Merrill agreed to hide the three of you for as long as needed. Did you get the heat suppressant from Thrask?”

“One,” said Bethany. “Devin…”

“We’ll talk later,” said Devin softly. “You need to get going.”

“Be careful,” Anders said softly.

“I will,” Devin said his teasing smirk finally surfacing. “I won’t have my little rabbit to rescue me.”

The journey up Sundermount took most of the night. There were more than a few rest stops along the way. Both Anders and Bethany only had the thin slippers mages were given instead of boots. They did nothing to protect their feet from sharp rocks or even the chill night air. While they rested Isabela had told them of all that had happened since his capture.

Varric had found Carver but Isabela had found Devin. Fenris and Aveline had been with him as well as Sebastian. She had managed to get them to the estate before she had told her terrible news. While the two warriors dealt with Devin, Isabela convinced Sebastian that it was in his best interests to stay put by tying him to a chair.

After he calmed down, Devin explained to him what they had found in the journal and some of the things Templars were allowed to do. Sebastian had still been skeptical but swore an oath that he wouldn’t turn Devin in to the Chantry. It hadn’t been until Devin had received word of Karras’ attack that Sebastian finally believed him.

Devin had been speaking with Ser Thrask and sending messages to Karl long before he’d been snuck into the Gallows. Their plan to free mages from the Gallows had been hatched nearly a month ago. In order to secure Isabela’s help, they had been looking for a book she had lost the night her ship had crashed into the rocks surrounding the Wounded Coast. The Qunari at the docks were also looking for this book.

The book had been difficult to find but it was now on its way to Antiva. Devin had arranged the hand off, the book for Isabela’s life, but the Qunari had found out about it. They weren’t very pleased about the whole affair. Devin had spent most of the day ensuring the book left Kirkwall safely and the Qunari had spent most of the day tearing the city apart looking for the book and the person who had stolen it.

Some Templars and the city guard were trying to subdue the rioting that had driven some of Kirkwall’s population down into Darktown. Fenris had suggested that getting rid of their leader might drive the Qunari out of Kirkwall and that’s what Devin was currently trying to do. Anders avoided the docks generally but he’d seen the Qunari on his way to the Gallows on the few occasions he’d had to go there. What he knew of their strange religion had been told to him by the Warden Commander, along with a warning to avoid them.

The sun was breaking over the horizon when they finally reached the Dalish camp. Merrill was waiting for them along with Mahariel and the Dalish who guarded the entrance. Her baby was a little over a month old and she was excited to see that he was now showing. They were led to an isolated area of the camp where they could eat and rest. The food was good and the ground hard beneath him but he didn’t mind. He was free once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My stuff doesn't generate a lot of comments and that's fine. I would however like to say, if all your going to do is spread hate then please don't post a comment. If you don't like the story, don't read it. It's that simple.


	26. Chapter 26

An aching back and a restless baby woke Anders around midday. The others were still asleep as he worked himself into a sitting position from lying on his side. He had used the spare robes as a pillow and left them on the thin pallet he’d slept on while he rubbed his belly. Yawning and stretching, he struggled to his feet and walked a short distance into the woods to relieve himself.

With Bethany, Carver and Isabela still asleep, Anders carefully picked his way across the camp to Merrill. He spent most of the afternoon with her and Mahariel. She asked many questions about the things he and Devin had discovered. Apparently Devin had given her a shortened version when he’d come seeking shelter for them. His favorite part of the afternoon came when he was allowed to hold her baby girl. Wrapped in a blanket and sleeping peacefully, it made him long for the day when he would hold his child.

Anders constantly watched the entrance to the Dalish camp waiting for Devin. Isabela eventually joined him, providing a distraction from the watching and waiting. She informed him that Bethany and Carver were also awake but were speaking quietly to each other. Since he didn’t want to intrude he spent most of the day either speaking with Merrill or wandering with Isabela.

The sun was setting when Devin finally arrived. He was supported by Sebastian who was the only other person with him. Anders hurried over with Isabela on his heels and set to work healing immediately. There were mostly a lot of cuts and bruises with one deep wound along his right side. When they were all settled around the fire, he and Sebastian told them of the battle.

They had gone searching for the Arishok and found him a short while after they’d separated. The battle had taken place inside the Viscount’s Keep with many of Kirkwall’s elite huddling in one corner of the throne room. Devin had managed to save most of everyone there, including the Viscount, but had taken quite a beating from the Arishok. Most of his day had been spent in the estate sleeping after many healing potions.

“They named me champion of the city,” Devin finished with a derisive snort.

“That’s a great honor, Hawke,” Sebastian said mildly.

“I don’t care,” said Devin shaking his head. “I’m still leaving. Saving Kirkwall was a side effect of trying to get rid of those blighted Qunari. The ship is intact by the way.”

“Good,” said Isabela. “I can’t wait to be back out on the water.”

“If you wouldn’t mind traveling back with Sebastian now, you should probably get your crew together. We need to start loading supplies as well,” Devin said. “The rest of the Qunari left while I was sleeping.”

“Sounds good,” she said standing. “It’s boring here anyway.”

“Is there anything I can do?” Carver asked.

“You need to stay here,” said Devin. “The blame for their escape is being put entirely on your shoulders. I had the unfortunate pleasure of meeting Knight-Commander Meredith before we started out.”

“What did she want?” Carver said frowning.

“You,” Devin said with a small smile. “She demanded to know where I was hiding you and the mages.”

“What did you tell her?” Bethany asked quietly.

“That I wasn’t my brother’s keeper,” he said a corner of his mouth twitching up further. Carver snorted and shook his head. “Besides that, I have plenty of witnesses at the Keep.”

“So Cullen and that other one kept silent?” Isabela asked.

“It appears so,” Sebastian said also standing. He turned to Carver. “Do you need…anything?”

“I’ll be fine for a while,” Carver said quietly.

A hush fell over the group for a moment before Devin broke it. “Sebastian, would you mind trying to find Anders and Bethany some clothes and boots? I’d like to stay here for a few days.”

“It will be hard to find Anders clothing that fits properly,” Sebastian said quietly.

“Just something that doesn’t scream ‘mage’,” Devin said with a small smirk. “I know it won’t do much good but…”

“Devin…” began Anders. He fell silent when Devin squeezed their joined hands.

Sebastian nodded as he said, “I will return in a few days.”

“Thank you,” Devin said smiling. Sebastian and Isabela walked away toward the entrance to the camp and silence fell over them once more. Devin put his arm around Anders and squeezed a moment before telling him quietly, “Stay here with Carver. We have a lot to discuss but I need to speak with Bethany first.”

Anders nodded and remained seated while Devin murmured to Bethany who sat on his other side. He watched them walk a short way into the woods. Carver stared into the fire and said quietly when they were out of earshot, “Did he ever tell you how they caught Bethany?”

“A boy from the village scared her,” Anders said quietly.

“He blames himself,” Carver said finally looking up at him over the flames. “He knew what John had planned. Devin said he told him not to do it…but he didn’t stop him.”

“Devin couldn’t have known her magic would manifest,” Anders said shaking his head. “That’s hardly his fault.”

“That’s what Father told him,” Carver said with a wry smile. His gaze turned serious once more. “He would have burned down the Gallows that first night after I turned you in if Fenris and Aveline hadn’t stopped him.”

“I’m not safe anywhere Carver,” said Anders softly. He ran a hand over his belly. “This makes it a little obvious.”

“I’m sure Devin will think of something,” Carver said turning back to the fire.

Anders had put down the bedroll and extra blanket Devin had brought with and was laying on his side facing the fire when Devin and Bethany finally returned. Carver was also lying down for the night and Bethany sank down to her spot without a word. Devin lay behind him and scooted forward until they were flush, pulling a blanket over them and then letting his arm rest on Anders’ side with one hand resting lightly on his belly. He threaded their fingers together over their baby and closed his eyes, glad for his solid warmth.

After breakfast the next day, Devin had asked Merrill to begin teaching Bethany how to fight with Anders’ staff. Devin had then taken him out into the woods, far enough away that they were alone but still close. There wasn’t much talking to start off with. It was more desperate kissing, frantic caressing and biting his bottom lip to keep quiet. His belly had presented a small problem but not an insurmountable one.

Now Devin lay on a blanket with Anders on top of him. Devin’s hands on top of his thighs but under his skirts that pooled around them, Anders leaned back on his arms and rocked his hips. He kept his movements slow and gentle, loving the way Devin filled him completely. Anders let his head fall back and couldn’t hold in his groan when he felt Devin’s hand around his cock. He struggled to keep moving as he came but he couldn’t. Devin thrust up into him a few times then his movements stilled as well.

Their panting joined the rustling leaves and the chirping birds until Anders sat forward. Devin was cleaning his bare chest with a handkerchief and threw it to the side, letting his skirts fall around them once more. He smirked as he reached out to smooth them over his belly.

“I’m not sure this position will work for much longer,” he said quietly, his hands reaching the very bottom of his belly. “Not much room down here.”

Anders smiled as he shifted slightly. “I’m sure we’ll figure something out. I’ve missed you.”

“I’m honestly scared to let you out of my sight,” he said softly his smirk turning into a genuine smile. “I’d have been here sooner but after all that champion business I didn’t think I’d make it.”

“The sooner we’re away from Kirkwall the better,” said Anders.

Devin laced his fingers behind his head and brought his knees up enough for Anders to lean back on them. “I agree completely,” he said seriously. “We need a destination first. I was thinking of going back to Ferelden. The King is rumored to be sympathetic.”

“He helped defeat the archdemon,” said Anders. “There are also rumors that he’s actually bonded to a mage as well.”

“I haven’t heard that one,” Devin said arching an eyebrow at him.

“You’ve never met him either,” Anders said thoughtfully. “I met him briefly at Vigil’s Keep when he allowed my conscription. The Warden Commander wouldn’t answer any of my questions about the dark haired mage that had been with him.”

“Sounds perfect then, only one small problem though. Ferelden’s a big country.”

“I remember the Commander telling us of a village in the foothills of the Frostback Mountains. She ended up killing a high dragon there and the citizens abandoned the village afterwards.”

“An abandoned village in the Frostbacks,” Devin said thoughtfully. “That might just be perfect. Close to Orzammar but far enough from most of the general population that we won’t be bothered for a while.”

“Do you really think we can get the dwarves of Orzammar to supply us with lyrium?” Anders asked curiously.

“I don’t think I could, but Varric can,” Devin said. “He’s the head of House Tethras with Bartrand gone.”

“Devin,” said Anders resting his hands on his belly. “How are you going to hide me?”

“I’m not sure,” he answered with a tiny frown. “I’ve thought of trying to pass you off as a woman but I’m not sure that will work. You’re not exactly dainty.”

“Neither is Aveline.”

One of his hands joined Anders’ as he smiled reassuringly. “We’ve got a couple of more weeks here in Kirkwall then two or three to Highever to figure something out.”


	27. Chapter 27

The next two weeks passed quicker than Anders had expected them to. When Sebastian returned with a change of clothes for him and Bethany, Devin went back to Kirkwall reluctantly. There were still things that needed to be done to ensure that his plans went smoothly. He returned every few days to spend time with them and to give them progress reports.

The clothes Sebastian had found for Anders were simple and fairly large. The trousers were tied with a drawstring and the shirts were simply enormous. On one hand, he found it nice to wear pants again but the drawback was one they could hardly afford. While he found them more comfortable, it brought attention to his rounded growing belly. Anders was glad he had brought the spare robes from the Gallows. As much as he didn’t care for the idea, trying to disguise him as a woman was the best option he could think of.

He certainly couldn’t travel through Ferelden looking as he did now, an obviously pregnant male. Anders would be revealed as a mage before they ever left Highever. With most of the cold weather behind them bundling him in a coat or cloak would look odd as well. Hiding among the others also wouldn’t work because he stood taller than most people.

Devin had plans of keeping him hidden in one of the wagons, which would work most of the time. It wouldn’t help when he needed to relive himself, that was happening more often as the baby grew, or when he simply needed to walk. Nothing had been settled on yet but Anders was letting his hair grow out just in case.

Most of the two weeks were spent training Bethany, when he wasn’t with Devin or busy worrying. Somehow Devin had managed to get a staff for her and she was just as awkward with it as he had been to begin with. She learned quickly, however, under his and Merrill’s guidance. Carver and Mahariel provided her with tips on how to defend against their preferred weapons as well as sparring with her. Anders didn’t take part in the sparring, the baby making his practiced moves awkward.

The night approached quickly. The ship was loaded with enough foodstuffs, heat suppressant and lyrium to last the trip across the water and a good ways into Ferelden as well. With Devin’s proceeds from the Deep Roads expedition, coin was plentiful. Enough clothes for the twenty or so enchanters, apprentices, and the ten children who would soon be freed of the Gallows were acquired. The Templars that would be coming with would have their own regular clothes, the distinctive armor brought along but hidden.

Anders thanked Merrill for all her help the day they left the encampment. She wished them luck and had hopes to see them again sometime in the future. The Dalish would be leaving Sundermount soon as well. With the blight over they were considering going back to Ferelden. Though it would probably be over land through Orlais instead of taking a ship across the Waking Sea, she had no desire to lose her second child like she had the first.

Devin led them back into Kirkwall through caves that opened on the Wounded Coast that led to Darktown. At the caves entrance, Anders, Bethany and Devin met his companions that would be taking the trip with them. Isabela was with her ship preparing to leave. After she dropped them off in Highever, she would remain on the sea. Varric would be staying with them for a while, long enough to teach the person with the most aptitude for it about trade and to ensure a deal with Orzammar for the lyrium the Templars needed. Aveline would be remaining in Kirkwall. She was currently at the docks securing a clear route for them.

Anders was surprised to see Fenris and Sebastian and even more surprised that they would both be remaining with them in the community Devin had planned to set up. Since Devin had helped Sebastian save his family from an unorganized assassination plot, he really wasn’t needed in Starkhaven. Sebastian had offered his services as a Brother of the Chantry. Most of the teachings of the Chantry weren’t bad, just their laws concerning mages. While he did think of Grand Cleric Elthina as a second mother, he felt that Devin’s plans had merit. A Chantry presence would hopefully show the rest of Thedas that mages could live their lives without being imprisoned.

Devin had asked Fenris to come with them so that they could avoid the pitfalls of Tevinter. Anders thought it was nothing short of a miracle that he had agreed. With what little Devin had told him about what the elf had suffered, it showed Fenris’ loyalty and trust in the rouge.

Carver and Sebastian stayed at the Darktown entrance to shuttle the mages to the ship. The rest of them were spread out along the route through the caves to the Gallows to make sure no one got lost. Devin stayed near the entrance into the Gallows, greeting the mages and Templars and sending them onward. Anders was the next person in line along the route, close enough for Devin to see him, and he sent them on to Bethany with nods of greeting and reassuring smiles.

The mages and Templars came in groups of three or four, with enough time between for the first group to be halfway through the tunnels before the next came along. The children came in a slightly larger group of three children, a mage and a Templar. They greeted Anders enthusiastically but quietly with hugs and pats to his belly. He sent them on with high hopes that they would grow up free with their time spent in the Gallows nothing but a distant memory. Karl and Cullen were the last to come through.

“There’s no one following,” Cullen said quietly as they approached. “I don’t think anyone is suspicious either.”

“I’m glad you’ve decided to join us Knight-Captain,” said Devin.

“I had no idea,” he said shaking his head. “I’ve brought your brother’s armor. He will be welcome among our ranks.”

“That’s for him to decide,” Devin said. “Let’s hurry.”

Karl gave him a brief hug as they continued on. Halfway through the tunnels, Karl and Bethany collapsed the main route and they continued on. Through the rest of the tunnels and Darktown they didn’t see anyone. Shortly after arriving at the docks Aveline joined them, and they continued on to where Isabela’s ship was moored. When they finally arrived, Anders breathed a sigh of relief. Kirkwall would soon be a speck on the horizon.

Isabela greeted him with a smirk after he’d said a quick goodbye to Aveline. “I think you’re a little rounder every time I see you,” she said patting his belly.

“Twenty-one weeks I think,” he said smiling.

“Too bad you won’t be around to see what you helped create,” Devin said coming up behind him. “Aveline says to come and visit sometime.” Isabela turned to where Aveline stood on the dock next to the ship. “You can count on it!” she yelled down.

“Take care, whore!” Aveline hollered back. She gave a small wave to them and walked away.

“Get below with the others for now,” said Isabela to them after a chuckle. “We still have to make it out of the harbor.”

Devin led them down into the section of the hold that had been reserved for them. The mages were all milling in a nervous group with most of the Templars surrounding them. He wasn’t at all surprised to see more Templars than mages. Cullen and Karl continued on and joined their respective groups. Devin frowned slightly as he took a few more steps down the stairs.

“I need some air,” Fenris said suddenly from behind him.

By the time Anders turned his head, Fenris was already gone. “Will he be all right?” asked Anders.

“He just needs some time. Like them,” Devin said quietly. He pointed down into the mass of people. “They’ve separated themselves even though they don’t need to. Even the bonded mages.” A shrill whistle cut through the low hum of conversation suddenly and every head turned in their direction. Devin put his arm around Anders’ shoulders as he addressed the crowd.

“You’re all here because you wanted change. Everyone here, mage and Templar, has already been brave enough to take that first step. Alphas find your mages…you don’t have to hide anymore.” A few of the older bonded pairs came together immediately such as Thrask and a mage Anders recognized from the library. When nothing happened to them several more sought out their bonded mate. “I’m sure you’re all very tired. Find a spot and get comfortable.”

“Will we be allowed on deck?” asked one of the older children.

“Once Kirkwall is behind us I’m sure the Captain will let us up on deck,” Devin said.

They stood there and watched as the two groups finally broke apart, mingling as they separated back into little groups of two or three. Devin led Anders the rest of the way down the stairs and led him to a secluded spot near the very back of the ship. Carver and Bethany followed as did Varric and Sebastian. There they lay on pallets and the rocking motion of the ship soon had Anders sleeping.

When he woke, Anders wasn’t sure where he was. It was dim but he could hear and feel Devin behind him. He relaxed slowly, remembering the long stressful day. With no truly pressing matters at hand, Anders was content to stay wrapped in his lover’s arms listening to his breathing. There was still much that needed to be done but for now he was safe and content.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little short and a bit anticlimatic, sorry. We haven't seen the last of Meredith though.


	28. Chapter 28

An omega in heat drew alphas like a field of flowers drew bees. Any alpha close enough would respond, despite the gender of either. Even though most of these bonded pairs had chosen each other, that element of randomness was still very present. Among the mages on the ship old enough to have gone into heat, only eight were not bonded.

Including Devin and himself, there were four same sex couples, two male pairs and two female pairs. There were also three pairs with a female alpha and a male omega. The rest of the dozen or so pairs were male alpha and female omega. Anders knew from having lived among the general population, same sex couples didn’t appear nearly as frequently. It wasn’t unheard of but having four out of twelve might raise a few unwanted questions.

There were also quite a few pairs of mixed race. Elven mages were slightly more common than human ones but there weren’t any elven Templars. This might raise a few suspicions as well. City elves as well as Dalish elves tended to keep their relationships within their own race. Devin planned to use these noticeable oddities to their advantage. They were outcasts looking for a place to call home. It was simple and not far from the truth.

Their first task the next day was to separate the group into family units. Ten children without parents would definitely attract the attention of the local authorities where ever they went. The apprentices and children were placed with couples as well as a few of the younger Templars. They had the rest of the sea voyage to get used to being in these family groups. They went on deck together, slept in the same area together and generally everything else possible in the cramped confines of Isabela’s ship.

Because there was so little space on the ship, it was stressed to every mage how important it was to keep using the heat suppressant. Even a bonded mage in heat would drive the many alphas on the ship crazy with desire. It was advised for them to keep taking it even after they made landfall. Besides the fact it would slow down travel, there was always a possibility of being caught. Anders spent quite a bit of time schooling the other mages on how to remain hidden.

For the nearly two weeks they’d spent on the sea, things had been surprisingly peaceful despite the number of people crammed together in such a small space. Isabela’s crew knew nothing more than they carried passengers as far as Highever with Anders being the one exception. He had no idea what the crew had been told about him but all of them stayed well away. While on deck there was no mention made of mages or Templars.

Anders was on deck with Bethany, watching the port of Highever get closer. He was thinking about going back below deck so that he wouldn’t accidentally be seen when Bethany touched his arm lightly.

“Why does he keep staring at me?” she asked quietly nodding her head in Fenris’ direction.

Fenris was standing at the front of the ship with Devin and Isabela. He was currently watching them but looked away when Anders met his gaze. Anders turned to Devin for a moment before turning back to Bethany.

“Let’s go below,” he said quietly. “I probably shouldn’t be out here anyway.” When they were in the hold and heading toward the spot they had been sleeping in he said, “Are you sure he’s been staring at you? He doesn’t exactly like me and he’s watched me from nearly the moment we met.”

“Yes, I’m sure,” Bethany said as they sat. “He makes me nervous.”

“He makes me nervous too,” Anders said with a small smile.

Devin joined them below moments later, an amused smirk upon his lips. “I think Fenris is quite taken with our lovely Bethany.”

Bethany paled and Anders frowned. “How is that amusing?” he asked cautiously.

“It’s more interesting than amusing,” Devin said. “Carver noticed days ago and apparently had a chat with him.”

“Since no one’s come up missing any vital body parts can I assume he was at least polite?” Anders said.

“Fenris said he was,” said Devin shrugging.

“What do I do?” Bethany said quietly.

“For now, you continue to be your sweet self and let him approach first,” Devin said soothingly. “Fenris hasn’t had the easiest life in Tevinter.”

“What if I don’t…want him?” she asked nervously.

“Then you politely refuse,” Devin said with another shrug. “As long as you keep taking the heat suppressant you aren’t going to end up with someone you don’t want. I think you ought to give him a chance at least.”

“I’m a little scared of him,” Bethany said her eyes darting between Devin and Anders.

“Devin made me nervous at first too,” Anders said smiling.

“Really?” said Bethany in surprise.

“Don’t worry Bethany,” said Devin confidently. “He won’t hurt you.” She nodded and Devin continued, his voice turning serious. “We’ll be in port tomorrow. Do you think we can disguise him?”

“If he leaves the belt of off the robes they will look more feminine,” Bethany said nodding. “There’s enough room in the chest area of the robes that we can tie something around him that we can stuff. He won’t look very well endowed but it’ll be enough to make it look like he isn’t completely flat-chested. His hair is long enough I’ll be able to do something girly with it and with a bit of cosmetics…”

“I’m going to look ridiculous,” Anders pouted.

“If it keeps you out of Templar hands we’ll both be better off,” Devin said sympathetically.

“I know,” said Anders with a sigh. “I don’t have to like it though.”

The next morning, he sat below deck on a crate while Bethany worked on his face and hair. He was already uncomfortable but tried to be patient. The top of his robes felt tight with the strategically placed cloth on his chest but not uncomfortably so. His skirts had felt too loose without the belt gathering them at his hips. Bethany had left most of his hair loose but had braided a section of the front pieces and pinned them around the top of his head. She was currently painting color on his lips after having done several other things he’d rather not think about.

“This is never going to work,” said Anders frowning and shifting uncomfortably.

“Stop fidgeting,” Bethany said stepping away. “Stand up, let me look.”

He stood as she asked and gathered the sides of his skirts in his hands to keep them away from the cloth that had been tied around his chest. She eyed him critically as Devin came around a stack of supply crates that they had hidden behind. A corner of his mouth quirked up and Anders scowled at both of them.

“Are you sure you can’t just pack me in a box?” he asked irritably. “Might be easier to just give me food and water every once in a while.”

“And carry the crate to the woods every few hours because you can’t hold all that water for very long?” teased Devin. “I don’t think so little rabbit.”

“You’re likely going to be doing that any way,” Anders muttered gripping his skirts tighter in irritation.

“At least I won’t have to carry you this way,” Devin said moving around Bethany. He put a hand on Anders’ shoulder and his voice turned soothing. “Relax, you look fine.”

“I probably look as silly as I feel,” pouted Anders.

“We’ve almost got the wagons loaded,” said Devin. “Bethany, we’ll be up in a minute.”

“You look fine Anders,” Bethany said reassuringly as she gathered her things.

Devin waited until they were alone before he pried Anders hands loose from his skirts. “Relax Anders,” he said softly.

Anders sighed in frustration before he said, “I’m just not very comfortable.”

“I know,” said Devin after he placed a gentle kiss on the back of his hand. “If there was another way that we could think of I’d do it. It won’t be for long either, just until we reach our destination.”

“I really don’t look horrible?” Anders asked.

“I don’t think you’ll have potential suitors climbing over each other to get to you,” said Devin his teasing smirk surfacing briefly. “But I don’t think you’ll turn heads for the wrong reasons either.”

Anders smiled briefly despite the nervous flutter in his stomach and hoped that they were right. There was simply nothing else short of stuffing him in a crate. His belly was too large, too rounded to be anything but a baby. He nodded and Devin turned, pulling him gently so that Anders was ahead and they climbed the stairs.

On deck, there were people running everywhere. Crates of supplies were taken down the gang plank by sailors, Templars and mages. Cullen, Fenris and Varric were directing everything, making sure nothing was dropped and it all ended up in the right wagons. Isabela stood not far away, a spyglass held to her eye, looking out to sea. Most of the people on board ignored the two new people, moving around Anders and Devin swiftly and with purpose. Anders stayed close to Devin as he walked up to her.

“Tell me,” she said conversationally. “Do Templars have their own ships?”

“I don’t know,” Devin said frowning.

“Look,” Isabela said handing over the spyglass. She pointed to a speck near the horizon. “There.”

“Bloody…” Devin cursed softly after a moment. He handed her back the spyglass. “How much longer will it take to unload?”

“Not long at this rate,” Isabela said as she collapsed the glass.

“Good,” said Devin. “You should probably leave as soon as we’re off. Don’t let the damn woman catch you either.”

“Devin?” said Anders quietly.

“Templars,” he said simply. “Most likely Kirkwall Templars.”

“Looking good Anders,” Isabela said suddenly. He couldn’t quite tell if she was teasing or serious.

“Thank you,” Anders said through a tight lipped smile. “We should be going.”

“Might want to stay quiet,” she said putting an arm around his shoulders. “You look decent but you don’t sound like a woman at all.”

“Thanks for your help Isabela,” Devin said irritably pulling him away from her. “We’ll keep that in mind.”

“No problem,” said Isabela with a genuine smile. “Thanks for the ship. I’ll definitely be visiting sometime.”

“I’ll look forward to it,” said Devin with a smirk. “Hate to cut this short but we both have some Templars to get away from.”


	29. Chapter 29

Anders spent a good portion of time in the lead wagon. Every morning Devin shaved him carefully before Bethany reapplied the cosmetics that had been washed off the night before. Other travelers merely glanced at him in passing. Devin didn’t really give them a chance for a second look. He was pushing them forward at a hard pace.

Devin had estimated six to eight weeks for them to reach the abandoned village of Haven. Varric had found an old map while they were still in Kirkwall. They would have to travel on the Imperial Highway along Lake Calenhad, taking them close to Kinloch Hold but also taking them close to Orzammar. When they came close Varric would take a small group of his chosen students plus Carver and Sebastian to begin the process of making a deal for the lyrium they would need.

Varric had taken most of the mages and Templars aside while they were still on the ship. Anders didn’t know much about trade or merchants but Varric could frequently be seen with his chosen students. A few of them always went with him into the villages and towns they came across. Devin always took the wagons straight through and waited for Varric to return with more supplies on the other side.

The plants needed to make more heat suppressant were all fairly common in Ferelden and Anders had made sure every mage knew what they looked like. They would have to stop for at least a day sometime soon so that he could make more. He planned on showing at least four others the process so that he wasn’t the only person in their group who knew how to make it.

For the most part the traveling was very dull. When he wasn’t riding on the lead wagon he walked along side it with Devin. The most interesting thing that had happened so far was watching Fenris and Bethany. Anders could tell that she was nervous whenever Fenris approached and although he didn’t look it, Devin assured him the elf was just as nervous. It began with a few quiet words that blossomed into short conversations. Three weeks into their journey they had progressed to walking together at least part of the time when Bethany wasn’t instructing the children.

They had been stopped on the shores of Lake Calenhad for a few days now. A group had been sent into a nearby village for supplies while Anders carefully supervised the making of more heat suppressant. The vials had been washed and saved as they were used and the latest batch was ready to be poured into them.

Some of the herbs had been picked carefully and replanted in whatever container was handy. When they arrived at Haven and got settled they wouldn’t need nearly as much of the important potions but it would still be needed. A garden full of every herb used in the potion was an excellent way to ensure it didn’t run out.

Anders sighed tiredly as he carefully lowered himself onto a nearby rock. They would be back to traveling again tomorrow and he wasn’t looking forward to it. He rubbed his aching back and sighed again. Whether he was walking or riding it didn’t seem to matter, his back constantly ached and the baby always seemed restless.

Karl, who had fallen into the role of First Enchanter after Anders had declined it, came up to him and sat on the ground beside him. “How far along are you Anders?” he asked.

“Seven months…twenty-six weeks give or take. Why?” said Anders after a moment of thought.

“Because you look further along than that,” he answered concern clear in his voice. “How active is the baby?”

“Very,” Anders sighed as he winced. “The baby really needs to stop kicking my bladder. I’ll be back in a moment.”

He hauled himself upright wondering what could possibly be bothering Karl. Thinking back as he wandered a short distance into a nearby clump of bushes, he realized the baby had always been fairly active. How that was cause for concern he didn’t know. It had always been comforting to him even when the baby kept him awake sometimes, especially before Carver had gotten him and Bethany out of the Gallows.

As he walked back to where Karl was now talking with Devin, he ran his hands over his belly. He supposed the baby was a bit large. He had presided over more than a few pregnancies and he thought back, searching for something that might be worrisome because of a large overactive baby. Anders could think of nothing but the slightly worried look on Karl’s face was beginning to make him worry.

“…was always sick,” he heard Devin say as he approached. “It seemed worse before noon but Anders said it was normal so I didn’t worry about it. I thought it was getting much better right before he was captured.”

“Karl what’s wrong?” asked Anders starting to feel actively nervous.

“Did Meri look?” he asked instead of answering.

“No,” said Anders running his hands restlessly over his belly. “There wouldn’t have been much point, I wasn’t far enough along. Karl…”

“May I?” Karl interrupted.

“Look?” Devin said with a raised eyebrow. “What on Thedas are you talking about?”

“Most mage healers know a spell that can…see inside…it’s hard to explain,” said Anders. “Karl isn’t a spirit healer but he is talented with creation and spirit magic. Senior Enchanter Wynne taught both of us.”

“Why haven’t you done this already?” Devin asked. “Is it dangerous?”

“Only if you try it on yourself,” Karl said soothingly. “It’s harder to concentrate. Please allow me. I don’t think Anders is in any danger right now but if my suspicions are correct it may change a few things.”

“This won’t hurt Anders or the baby?” Devin asked.

“Not at all,” said Karl in that same soothing tone.

Devin looked to him for a moment and Anders nodded. He didn’t have any idea what Karl was worried about but he had performed this spell many times. It would be odd to be on the receiving end of it but Anders simply had to know.

“All right,” Devin said slowly. “What do we need to do?”

“Over here,” said Karl gesturing away from the little crowd that had gathered. He led them around one of the wagons and looked back before he followed them. “Please stay here. There’s nothing wrong.”

Devin exchanged a slightly worried look with Anders and he shrugged. “Karl what is it?” Anders asked quietly.

“Don’t worry Anders,” Karl said gesturing them down to the ground. “I promise I’ll tell you in a few minutes.” He turned to Devin and said, “If you would please sit, keep him comfortable.”

He helped Anders down to the ground after nodding at Karl. Devin sat behind him, resting against the wheel of the wagon and Anders leaned back against him with his legs crossed under him. Karl knelt in front of him and closed his eyes. Anders took a deep breath and placed his hands at the top of his belly. He could feel Devin’s hands rubbing his upper arms slightly and he took another calming breath.

Karl’s hands soon began glowing a soft blue color as they hovered over his belly. Watching him carefully, Anders saw him nod his head slightly and his hands drifted over to a different spot. Karl nodded again and sat back on his heels as the glow faded. His eyes opened and he smiled.

“It’s as I thought,” he said softly. “You carry two.”

“Two,” Anders said flatly as Devin hissed in his ear. “Two babies? Twins?”

“A boy and a girl,” Karl said nodding. “They appear healthy and well formed. You are going to have to take it easy and be watchful for signs of early birth.”

Anders slumped against Devin, who was very quiet, and tried to think past the shock he felt. There were two babies growing inside of him. It had been scary enough at first when he thought there was only one but two was an even more frightening thing. It was possible that he would carry them to term and nothing would go wrong. They would be smaller than normal even if they didn’t come early but there were also so many more things that could go wrong.

“Are you sure?” Devin asked calmly.

“Yes,” said Karl as he stood. “May I tell the others?”

“Go ahead,” said Devin. “We’ll be out in a moment.”

Karl nodded and then quietly left. Anders stared into the darkening sky, moving his hands lower on his belly. Arms circled around him, Devin’s hands coming to rest on top of his. Leaning back and relaxing a bit more into his embrace Anders let his head rest on the rogue’s shoulder. He felt a kiss, soft and quick at his temple.

“Don’t worry little rabbit,” Devin comforted.

A helpless bark of laughter escaped him. “Do I really have to be so much like a rabbit?” Anders asked suddenly amused by his nickname.

Another kiss to his temple and he could feel Devin smile before he answered softly. “I guess it’s a little more appropriate than we thought.”


	30. Chapter 30

“Twins…,” Anders said softly. “I can hardly believe it.”

“How will that change things?” Devin asked.

“It’ll be harder on me,” said Anders after a moment of thought. “There’s a chance they’ll be born early. Andraste’s knickers, I hope I can feed two babies.”

“Carver and Bethany are fine,” said Devin soothingly. “I don’t think you have much to worry about there but I’m sure we can figure something out if you can’t. How are you feeling?”

“Besides shocked?” Anders said turning his head slightly to see him.

“I’m a bit shocked too,” Devin said softly. “More responsibility…we have to come up with more clothes and diapers than what I’ve gotten so far but it’s exciting too.”

Anders thought for a moment and then smiled. “Yes,” he said. “It is isn’t it?”

“Come on,” said Devin as his arms tightened around Anders for a second. “Let’s get back to the others. We really should start discussing names.”

Anders sat forward and waited for Devin to stand. He held up his hand and was helped to his feet. “I’m going to be huge,” he said frowning.

Devin smirked as he took Anders’ hand. As they walked forward he continued speaking quietly. “I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing.”

They came around the end of the wagon and stopped in front of a very large group. It looked as if the whole camp was waiting for them and any reply Anders had fled his mind. Excited murmurs and a few shouted congratulations reached them before Bethany rushed forward out of the crowd. She wrapped him in a hug, bent awkwardly over his belly, and he returned it with a large grin. Carver followed at a more sedate pace.

“Twins!” she exclaimed excitedly. “How exciting!”

“Congratulations, Brother,” Carver said calmly crossing his arms over his chest.

“Hawke!” cried Cullen loudly as he made his way through the crowd to stand in front of them. “My scouts have finally returned,” he said grimly.

Caver moved to Devin’s other side and turned to face him. Devin’s easy smile turned to a small frown and he said seriously, “How far behind are they?”

“Keran said they’re still a good distance away but they’re making better time than we are,” answered Cullen his voice still grim.

“Damn,” said Devin in frustration.

“At this rate we might not make it to the village,” Cullen said.

There were frightened murmurs from the gathered crowd as they all listened intently. Anders knew a confrontation with Meredith and her Templars was inevitable. He had hoped it wouldn’t be quite so soon, that they wouldn’t be out in the open like this. It had been a worry he had managed to ignore most of the time. This bad news on top of finding out he carried twins only made it worse.

Devin squeezed his hand and stepped around Cullen to face the crowd. “Everyone, prepare to leave at first light tomorrow. I want to be gone before the sun is completely over the horizon.” The crowd broke slowly, leaving Anders, Bethany, Carver, Devin, Cullen and Karl all standing in the now empty clearing by the wagon. “Bethany, could you go find Varric please.”

“Right away,” she said before darting off.

“Karl, how many of the mages are able to fight?” Devin asked.

He thought for a moment before answering, “Around ten.”

Bethany arrived seconds later with Varric as well as Fenris and Sebastian. “Sunshine says they’re close. What’s the plan?” Varric asked calmly.

“How likely is it that we can seek shelter in Orzammar?” Devin asked.

“It’s possible but I wouldn’t bet on Bhelen being willing to risk it,” Varric said. “It’s going to be interesting enough getting a deal for the lyrium.”

“What are we going to do?” Anders asked.

“Try and stay ahead of Meredith until we can find a good spot to get rid of her. Tomorrow I want you three to go ahead of the wagons and look for one. Easily defended and possibly good for an ambush,” he said pointing to Carver, Fenris and Sebastian. They nodded and Devin turned to Cullen. “I want your most tactically minded person with us at the front of the line tomorrow along with Karl so we can begin coming up with a good plan. How outnumbered are we?”

“My scouts reported that she has twenty or so Templars with her,” said Cullen. “Technically we outnumber her.”

“We also have children and others to protect,” Devin said with a quick glance at Anders. “We’ll discuss this more tomorrow. For now let’s all get some rest. We need to stay ahead of her.”

They broke apart, each heading to their own campfires. Anders found it rather irritating that he couldn’t help. Fighting Templars was definitely not taking it easy. Bethany and Carver both sat around their fire, talking quietly to each other, and Devin followed him to the lake shore. He carefully sank to his knees as Devin sat beside him.

Sighing as he leaned forward, knees spread wide to accommodate his belly, he scooped up some of the water and scrubbed at his face. With water dripping from his nose and fingers, he sat up to feel Devin rubbing across the small of his back. “It’s not fair,” Anders complained quietly.

“We’ve defied her,” Devin said simply. “We took several of her mages and Templars from right under her nose. I can’t imagine she was very happy about that.”

“No,” sighed Anders. “She wouldn’t have been. I’ve only seen her once…and that was enough. I guess I was hoping she’d just…give up.”

“She won’t,” said Devin grimly. “She probably won’t be the last to give us grief either.”

“I know. It’s frustrating though,” said Anders turning to look at Devin. “I’m tired of being chased…of being worried that someone will find out and turn me in. I just…want to be free…and I can’t really help defend it.”

“Don’t lose heart,” Devin said reassuringly. “None of us would be here if you hadn’t been brave enough to search for answers.”

“I wouldn’t have found any of the things I was looking for without your help,” he said. Anders took Devin’s hand and placed it carefully on his belly. They were still and silent as they each felt one of the babies moving. “There’s so much more to look forward to,” he continued softly.

Devin pulled him close, one hand at his hip and the other still on his belly. “She won’t stop us,” he said confidently.

Despite the good and bad news the next week progressed much as they had before. It had been decided quickly that until Meredith could be dealt with the group wouldn’t be split. Devin started them early and they kept moving as long as they had the sun to light their path. A check of their supplies showed plenty of food for the moment.

With the heat suppressant that had been made during their stop Anders estimated they had enough for at least three more weeks. Their supply of lyrium wasn’t doing quite as well. It had been carefully rationed from the beginning and even though Varric had managed to acquire more there was still only enough to last almost two weeks.

Anders was only partially aware of the plans that were being made. He did know that Carver had left with Fenris and Sebastian but had already returned. The trail ahead of them split soon, one fork continuing south along Lake Calenhad and the western path would lead them to Orzammar. They had gone a short distance up into the Frostbacks before they found a spot in the trail that narrowed. To one side was a very steep hill and there was a sharp drop off on the other. The wagons could be hidden a little further up the trail. The three of them had agreed that it seemed like a perfect spot.


	31. Chapter 31

Their forces had been in place since dawn. Devin and Carver waited along with a small portion of their forces just beyond the narrow point in the trail. Cullen and another small group were hidden near the fork in the trail, waiting for the following Templars to pass. Sebastian, Varric, Karl and anyone else who was efficient with a bow or a fireball were hidden along the top of the steep hill. Bethany was among the group on the hill but her and the four other mages with her had a different task. They were to heal.

Anders, along with the children, a couple of young apprentices and a few Templars left to guard them were with the hidden wagons. Fenris, as much as he didn’t like the idea, had also been left with the wagons. The Templars that had been left with them were all patrolling around the wagons. They had arrived at the chosen spot in less than a week’s time, enough to plan. The armor the Templars had brought with had been dug out and donned, including Carver’s. The shoulder pieces of the armor had been painted a bright yellow so that the archers and mages knew who not to aim for. Almost a full week had passed and soon there would be fighting.

Now there was nothing left to do but wait and distract the frightened children as best as he could. He watched the extremely grumpy elf pace back and forth through the wagons as he sat on a stump with the children gathered around him. Anders suspected Fenris had been left behind to make sure he stayed put. The elf hadn’t let him out of his sight as the day had worn slowly on, even following him into the woods when Anders had to relieve himself.

As flattering as that thought was, he really wished Devin had chosen someone else. They had never gotten along very well and Fenris looked ready to chew iron and spit nails. It was bad enough that he was perfectly capable of helping to defend them but hadn’t been allowed to. He knew it was dangerous and that he shouldn’t strain himself but he should be on the hill instead of Bethany. It was all very annoying.

“Perhaps that’s why he’s so angry,” Anders whispered to himself.

“Anders,” said the youngest of the children, a girl of seven. She stood next to him, her hands clasped in front of her, shifting her weight from one foot to the other.

“Yes Kari?” Anders said smiling as he turned his attention away from Fenris.

“What are twins?” she asked shyly.

“It means that there are two babies in here,” he said rubbing his belly and smiling a little wider. “Miss Bethany and Carver Hawke are twins.”

“I thought we could only have one at a time,” said a boy sitting close to him. “Mum…my real mum…had all my brothers and sisters one at a time.”

“Normally that’s how it works David,” Anders said turning to him. “Until Karl checked we thought there was only one baby.”

He looked over at Fenris again and noticed that he was now talking quietly with two of the Templars that had been stationed with them. It didn’t look like he was happy about whatever Emeric and Keran were telling him. He hadn’t been happy all day but his stormy expression had gotten worse.

“Anders, could you come over here for a minute please?” Keran asked when he noticed Anders watching them.

“No,” Fenris said loudly. The elf frowned and resumed speaking in a lower tone of voice.

“Ella, Feynriel, will you watch the children please,” Anders asked of the two apprentices sitting near them.

“Of course,” Ella said cheerfully as she hurried over dragging her companion with.

As he stood, Anders made a mental note to ask about the boy. There were dark circles under his eyes and his smile had been a little strained. He put that out of his mind for the moment as he made his way to the two Templars and Fenris.

“Hawke might be in trouble,” Keran said when he was close enough. “I spotted a well-armed group of men, they skirted the hill and then I lost sight of them. They could be sneaking around to attack us or get at Hawke from behind.”

“We have to warn him,” said Anders frowning.

“They are already fighting Alrik,” said Emeric. “Anyone we send will be in grave danger.”

“I can do it,” Anders said after a moment of thought.

“No,” Fenris said firmly. “You will remain here.”

“There’s no one else here we can send who won’t get caught up in the fighting,” he said feeling frustrated. “Besides that if they do come for us I’ll be in just as much danger.”

“No,” Fenris repeated.

“Don’t be a stubborn ass,” Anders said angrily. “I won’t have to join the fight I just have to get near him.”

“You will remain here,” Fenris said through gritted teeth. “I will warn Hawke.” He turned to the younger of the two Templars and said, “You will not let him out of your sight.” Keran nodded nervously and stepped aside quickly as Fenris brushed past him. “Get the other Templars together and ready yourselves for an attack.”

Anders watched him stalk away with a scowl. There was nothing he could really do except follow orders. Emeric dashed off to find the others and Keran smiled at him sheepishly. The last thing he wanted was another Templar escort but he took a deep breath to calm himself. Devin was likely just worried about the babies and after having traveled with these same people for almost six weeks now he thought they were probably as excited as he was. He exhaled the breath slowly and smiled at the nervous Templar he’d been left with.

“Where can we hide the children?” Anders asked calmly.

“There’s a cave not far away,” Keran said gesturing at the hillside behind them. “It shouldn’t be that hard to defend the entrance with four of us.”

“Five,” Anders said trying to still sound calm. He didn’t think it worked very well. “Just because I’m pregnant doesn’t mean I can’t cast a spell.”

“Right,” Keran said quickly. “Five.”

“Come on,” Anders said sourly as he turned around.

Anders ended up falling asleep in the cave. He was leaning against the wall in the center of the children with Ella and Feynriel to either side of him. Several of the children were using them as a pillow. The rest of the day had passed uneventfully but Fenris hadn’t returned. He tried not to worry, knowing that the elf had more than likely gotten caught up in the fighting.

Exhaustion had finally over taken him after he’d coaxed the children to sleep. There was plenty of worry for Devin and the others and quite of bit of curiosity about how the fight had went. He wanted to know how many of their people had been hurt but had to be content to wait.

Light was shining into the cave when he woke. There were soft snores from the children curled up around him. Across from him Devin rested against the wall of the cave. He looked the rogue over searching for wounds but he was too far away to really see. There was no way he could move without disturbing everyone around him.

“We won,” Devin said softly.

“How many dead?” asked Anders just as quietly.

“Surprisingly none…yet. There are some seriously wounded.”

“Take me to them,” said Anders as he began carefully extracting himself from the pile of children.

“They’re being cared for,” Devin said as he stood.

Anders frowned at him and continued to work himself upright. A few of them stirred restlessly as he carefully stepped over and around them. He took Devin’s outstretched hand for balance and he was finally free with most of the children still sleeping. Those he’d accidentally woke didn’t seem too inclined to move and since there were plenty of others in the cave now, Anders pulled Devin out of it.

“I believe you’re a little cross with me,” Devin said sounding slightly amused.

Without confirming or denying his statement, Anders continued to pull him out into sparse woods that were nearby. When they were more or less alone he turned to face Devin with his hands crossed over his chest.

“I don’t need a sitter,” Anders hissed angrily. “Especially one who doesn’t like me.”

“Anders,” Devin said cautiously.

“I know you’re concerned,” he interrupted. “You’ve always trusted me to know my limits before. Just because there are two babies hasn’t changed that.”

“I do trust you,” said Devin quietly. “Come with me and I’ll take you to the wounded.”

He knew that he was probably angrier than he should be but he also couldn’t help it. All the stress and worry only compounded the irritation. Devin was silent as he led them through the camp. A brief touch to his shoulder was all he received as he sought out the mage currently in charge. He spent most of the day among the wounded, losing himself to the familiar routine of caring for those who needed it.

Devin wasn’t always near but Anders could usually see him, either talking with others or simply leaning against a tree watching him. Slowly his anger ebbed away. With most of the injured on their way to recovery, Anders wearily made his way over to the rogue and stood in front of him. Devin smiled warmly as he pushed away from the tree.

“Can I explain myself now?” Devin said quietly.

“I’m sor…” Anders began. He was stopped when Devin put a finger to his lips.

“Don’t be,” said Devin seriously. “You have a perfectly valid complaint. There hasn’t been much time since we found out you carry twins. I would have explained this morning but I didn’t think you were much inclined to listen.”

Anders smiled and gestured to an area that wasn’t completely crowded. Devin took his hand and led him out of the camp entirely. They were on the path that led to Orzammar when he finally stopped and faced him.

“I wasn’t very old when Mother was pregnant with Carver and Bethany,” he began leaning against a tree. “I don’t remember much about it but she never became pregnant again after they were born. She still went into heat, regular as clockwork and it was my responsibility to take care of Carver and Bethany when she did. Until I started developing of course, then I was sent to the barn. I never thought anything of it until Father started explaining all this. The twins…did something to her. Father thinks that’s why she never had any other children.”

“That’s…terrible,” Anders said slowly.

“I’m sorry if I seem a little…overprotective suddenly. I just…really don’t want anything to happen.”

“It’s all right,” said Anders. “It makes a lot more sense now. Devin, I probably should have told you this earlier…Grey Wardens have a shortened life span…they also aren’t as fertile…”

Devin closed his eyes when Anders trailed off. He stood in front of him, shifting his weight nervously from foot to foot. Anders waited patiently, hoping Devin wasn’t angry at him. After his overreaction this morning Anders thought he probably deserved a little of his ire but Devin simply smiled when his eyes finally opened.

“All the more reason to keep these two safe,” he said straightening as he pulled Anders close.


	32. Chapter 32

For the rest of the day Devin clung to him more than was normal. He had never been very big on public displays of affection but there was plenty of it now. Anders tried his best not to get annoyed. It wasn’t every day you found out your lover was going to die early after all. He knew that he should have told Devin this long ago but the time had never seemed right. It probably still wasn’t but then there really wasn’t ever a right time to find out something like that.

Devin was currently behind him, pressed as closely to his back as he could get. If he wasn’t sitting upright, the only way Anders could sleep comfortably was on his side. He didn’t mind Devin being so close to him. The feel of his chest as he breathed, one of his ever restless hands tracing patterns on his belly, even how his breath sometimes tickled the back of his neck, these were all things he’d grown accustomed to. The one thing he missed now was listening to Devin’s heartbeat. The babies currently prevented Anders from sleeping like that.

Anders knew that Devin was still awake and his soft question was expected. “How long?”

“Thirty or forty years,” said Anders just as softly. “I was told it’s a little different for every Warden.”

“Long enough to see these two grown,” he mused. “Maybe enough time to see grandchildren if they start earlier than we have.”

“It’s more than I ever hoped for,” said Anders smiling. “I’m very glad I met you Devin Hawke.”

“I’m glad you’re not very sneaky too, little rabbit,” Devin said after a soft kiss to his neck. “Leave me a large family and I might be able to get on without you.”

“I can’t promise that,” Anders said a little sadly. “I wasn’t even sure I could get pregnant in the first place.”

“It happened once,” said Devin reasonably. His voice became teasing and Anders couldn’t help but laugh softly after he’d finished speaking. “Besides, think of all the fun we’ll have trying.”

Devin chuckled softly and kissed his neck again after they fell silent once more. He continued to trace patterns on Anders’ belly, pausing every now and then when he could feel one of the babies move. Anders was nearly asleep when Devin spoke again.

“Anders,” he said close to his ear.

“Hmm?” Anders said sleepily.

“Is it still safe to have sex?”

“For a little while…probably shouldn’t the closer we get,” he replied yawning tiredly.

“Sleep well little rabbit.”

In the morning Anders continued helping with the wounded. The armor, the lyrium they carried and anything else usable had been scavenged off of the bodies of their pursuers before they were decently burned. Those Templars had been killed to a man but Meredith hadn’t been among them. The party had been led by a man named Ser Alrik. None of their Templars seemed sad at his death and most of the mages were downright ecstatic. He was apparently among the worst of the Gallows Templars.

The armed men Keran had spotted were opportunistic thugs. They had planned on finishing off whichever side had lost and then looting everything. Fenris had gotten caught up in the fight with the Templars but he’d found Bethany before Devin. After she had been warned she informed Karl and Sebastian. The thugs hadn’t been prepared for magic. The first few spells that exploded among their ranks routed them almost instantly. A scout had been sent to follow the fleeing men but he had since returned and reported they were well on their way elsewhere.

While speaking with Karl about the outcome of the battle, Anders remembered to ask about Feynriel. Karl had recently found out that the boy was plagued by an unusual amount of demons and had been meaning to ask Anders about him possibly being a Spirit Healer. The following Templars had put this on hold and it was the main reason he’d been left with the wagons along with Ella who’d volunteered to stay with him.

The idea of an apprentice was very exciting but was a little unrealistic while they traveled. Anders did set up a time while they were currently stopped to teach him a few tricks to getting a good night’s sleep however. Senior Enchanter Wynne had taught him these tricks and he would gladly pass them on. Having one of their younger mages succumbing to demons was simply not an option.

With the lyrium they had found on the killed Templars, they now had enough for two weeks again. Since they were so close to Orzammar, Devin had decided that the rest of their camp would wait here while their wounded healed. Varric, Sebastian and Cullen were sent to see King Bhelen about a deal for a steady supply of lyrium. While they waited Anders had suggested to Karl that it would be a good idea for them to seek out more of the herbs necessary for the heat suppressant.

A few days had passed since the fight and most of the camp was currently out scouring the hillside for the herbs needed. Anders knew that he would be stuck at camp and it bothered him a little. Care of the wounded was passed to him and it kept him busy enough that it didn’t bother him that much. Some of the less seriously injured were already up and about. With the others well on their way to recovery and most of their needs being met by a few assistants that had stayed as well, Anders found himself sitting against a nearby tree dozing lightly.

If his count was correct, there were about twelve weeks left until he’d give birth. The following three months would be the hardest. He could already feel the strain the babies were putting on his back and it seemed like his belly grew larger by the day. It didn’t take much to wear him out and he thought that would only get worse. Karl had stressed more than once that he wasn’t to over tax himself. To that end resting a little more often than he might have normally was probably a good thing.

When he woke, Devin was sitting next to him. “Devin,” Anders said while he yawned and stretched. “Where have you been all morning?”

“Until recently I was trying to help find some of the plants you need,” said Devin as he stood. “Cullen is back from Orzammar.” He held out his hand and Anders took it and was pulled to his feet.

“Just Cullen?” he asked brushing off his skirts.

“Varric was able to secure an audience quickly. Bhelen is willing to deal but he wants proof and his infant son is apparently very ill. It was mentioned that we have an excellent healer and…”

“Do you know what the infant has?”

“Only that he’s got a fever. Can the others handle our wounded?”

“Yes. When do we leave?”

“As soon as possible.”

It was evening when they reached the gates of Orzammar. Cullen was expected and he, Devin and Anders were sent through without a fuss. Anders couldn’t help but gape at the grand statues of their Paragons and he was struck speechless when they entered the Commons. He finally understood why Bartrand was so entranced by the Thaig they had found during the expedition to the Deep Roads. Orzammar was nothing like that place.

There were buildings everywhere, dwarven runes carved into most surfaces, more statues and wide open spaces one wouldn’t expect to find in an underground city. The dwarves wandering around glanced at them as Cullen led them further in. Anders wasn’t stared at any worse than either Devin or Cullen. He was still disguised though and it was unlikely that any of them knew he was a mage.

Their destination was the Palace in the Diamond Quarter. Cullen spoke with the guards at a closed gate and they were led through. The nobles here didn’t bother to hide their curiosity. They were openly watched and Anders could hear whispered conversations all around him. It reminded him of Hightown and he walked a little closer to Devin.

The buildings in the Diamond Quarter were similar to the ones he’d seen in the Commons. They were larger and decorated a bit more lavishly but essentially the same. Cullen led them straight to the Palace where he was stopped and questioned again. After a brief conversation they were allowed in.

“We were given guest quarters,” Cullen said quietly as he led them through hallways. “The King wished to see us again as soon as we got back but Varric said to come back here first.”

“Why’s that?” Devin asked. “If this boy is that sick shouldn’t we go there first?”

“I’m not sure exactly,” said Cullen finally coming to a stop in front of a door.

It looked like all the other doors Anders had seen and he fervently hoped he wouldn’t be expected to find his way around alone anytime soon. The inside of this place was almost as confusing as the Gallows. Inside the room, Varric and Sebastian were sitting in a common area of the guest rooms they’d been given. Their conversation stopped as Cullen closed the door behind them.

“I was hoping you’d bring Blondie,” said Varric sounding relieved. He stood and crossed the room to them quickly. “Let’s get you out of that dress.”

“Why?” said Devin warily.

“Bhelen’s a suspicious bastard,” Varric said distastefully. “He’ll have to believe Anders is a mage. He’s also more likely to believe you have only the kid’s best interests in mind when he sees that you have one on the way.”

“Varric, I don’t have anything else that will fit,” said Anders beginning to feel nervous. “Besides, I’m not sure I like the idea of advertising that I’m a mage.”

“The only Templar in Orzammar is standing behind you,” Varric explained patiently. “There is a Chantry presence but he isn’t allowed into the Diamond Quarter. I don’t think he’d know quite what to do with you anyway.”

“I don’t know Varric,” Devin said skeptically. “There are opportunists and thugs everywhere.”

“Hawke, I don’t know if this is the best way but it is the quickest. If your little project is going to work you need a steady supply of lyrium or you’re going to have a lot of crazy Templars on your hands. That includes Junior,” Varric said seriously. “One of us will stay with Blondie at all times and if someone decides they want to keep him we can always change their minds.”

“All right,” Devin said. “Which room is ours?”

“Just pick one, but hurry.”

Devin took his hand and led him to the left, to the door nearest their position and shut it behind them. Frowning, Anders began working the buttons on his robe while Devin picked out the braids in his hair.

“I’m not sure about this,” Anders said quietly.

“I’m not either,” Devin replied just as softly. “Varric’s right though.”


	33. Chapter 33

Dressed in the same robe he’d put on that morning, Anders followed Varric and Cullen with Devin beside him and Sebastian behind him. Without the make-up, the stuffed cloth tied around his chest and his hair pulled back into a simple ponytail he wasn’t sure if he felt better or not. Despite how closely he was surrounded by his companions he was openly stared at by nearly everyone they passed.

Every other time he was caught out as a mage he had been similarly surrounded and stared at. The fearful and wanting looks he’d sort of gotten used to. He was not prepared for the open, almost childlike curiosity that he was getting now. Whispers followed them down the hall but no one stopped or even talked to them. Whether that was because they knew why Anders was here or because of his friends surrounding him, he didn’t know.

Anders knew that he was only bringing attention to his belly with his arms wrapped around it but he couldn’t help himself. The curious stares were making him nervous. Devin’s arm slung around his waist helped but he would definitely be glad when they were alone.

They entered a large room with a pair of guards on either side of the open doorway. A large throne sat at the back of the room with a rather intimidating dwarf sitting on it. Dark eyes watched their group closely as they approached. He wore a massive crown that hid most of his features but a dark blonde beard could be seen surrounding a slightly frowning mouth.

“King Bhelen,” Varric said evenly. “This is our best healer, Anders, and our leader, Devin Hawke.”

Varric and Cullen stepped to the side and Devin pulled him forward. Anders watched Bhelen carefully but besides a lingering look at his belly there was no reaction from the King. Devin’s arm tightened around him, pulling them closer together. There were more curious stares from the guards and retainers that surrounded him.

“Majesty,” Devin said politely.

Bhelen nodded in acknowledgement, his gaze flickering briefly to Devin but coming back to Anders. “Can you truly heal my boy?” he asked.

“I’ll have to see him to know if I can heal him,” said Anders striving to keep his voice calm and even. “I promise I’ll do what I can.”

“Come with me,” Bhelen said tersely.

The King of Orzammar stood and strode calmly towards the opened doorway Anders had just come through. The two guards that had been to either side of the throne, marched stiffly ahead of him. When he passed through it, two more followed behind. Varric and Cullen led the way again and he stayed close to Devin. After another series of confusing corridors, King Bhelen and his guards stopped before an impressive door.

“You only,” Bhelen said as he turned and pointed to Anders.

“No,” Devin said immediately. He stepped in front of Anders one hand drifting towards his daggers. “Where he goes I go.”

The guards also had hands resting on weapons but King Bhelen raised a hand and none were pulled. Anders backed up a step and felt Sebastian’s hand around his arm. Varric had backed up beside him while Cullen stood next to Hawke, his hand also on his sword. The air was thick with tension.

“As a fellow concerned father,” Devin said mildly. “I expect you’ll understand.”

With Devin and Cullen in front of him, Anders couldn’t see the dwarven King but his voice was as calm and mild as Devin’s. “Forgive me. Recent attempts on my life have made me…cautious. By all means…”

The two men in front of him straightened and Cullen stepped aside again. Two of the guards remained by the door but two went in before King Bhelen. Devin followed and his arm was released just before he followed as well. The divided room was spacious, the front a living area with couches and tables sectioned off from the back by a small step and a decorative wall. The guards stationed themselves at either side of the wide doorway leading to the sleeping area.

The master bed was sitting against the far wall. There were wardrobes scattered along one wall but a crib sat against the other. Bhelen went to the woman sitting in a chair next to the crib and placed a hand on her shoulder. Her dark red hair was braided and rolled into a bun at the base of her neck and a strange tattoo was visible just under her right eye, almost lost in the fuzzy red hair of the boy she held. Her sad dark eyes were liquid as she held the babe closely, patting his back gently.

Devin paused to let Anders pass but was right behind him as he hurried over to them. Like every other dwarf here, her gaze lingered on his belly a little too long but when she did look up at him, she pleaded without words for help. With the support of Devin’s offered hand, Anders knelt in front of her.

“May I?” Anders asked softly reaching for the baby.

“Please,” she whispered holding the baby carefully out to him.

Anders frowned as he cradled the baby. He wore only a diaper and his skin was very warm. His eyes were open and they rolled lethargically towards the stranger that now held him but made no effort to cry or protest. One of his arms hung limply towards his mother, the other resting against Anders’ chest.

“How old is he?” Anders asked as he began trying to cool the fever.

The mother gasped quietly when his hand glowed softly but it was Bhelen who answered. “Eight months.”

“How long has he been like this?”

“Three days,” King Bhelen answered again. “Our healers haven’t been able to help him.”

“Any excess vomiting?”

“No,” his mother said quietly. “He doesn’t eat well.”

“Is it all right if I put him to sleep?” asked Anders looking up at Bhelen and his wife.

“It won’t hurt him?” Bhelen asked suspiciously.

“No,” Anders said shaking his head. “He’ll wake normally. I think he’s got a cold that affects children worse than adults. I can help his body fight it but getting him to sleep will help too.”

“Very well,” said Bhelen.

The room was silent as Anders worked. The boy’s eyes closed slowly as the sleep spell took hold. He cooled the fever and cast a healing spell. It wouldn’t cure the boy. There were some things that the body had to take care of naturally but Anders could speed the process with his magic. The boy seemed to be resting a bit more peacefully when Anders handed him back to his mother. Devin offered his hand and Anders hauled himself to his feet.

“I’ll want to see him again in the morning,” Anders said looking at King Bhelen. “He isn’t completely cured but he should feel better. When he wakes, try and get him to drink something at least, even if it’s just water. Don’t force it though.”

“Thank you,” said the boy’s mother.

Bhelen nodded and gestured towards the doorway. Anders turned and walked towards it with Devin close behind him. The King didn’t follow them and the other three members of their party waited by the outer door. There was a collective sigh of relief and Varric led the way back to their quarters. They were in the bedroom furthest from the door before Devin relayed what had happened.

“So we’re going to be here a few more days,” Devin said. “Tell me Anders, is there any sort of potion that would have helped that poor child?”

“Of course,” said Anders. “I don’t imagine the potion makers down here have access to the herbs needed though.”

Devin grinned and he paced the length of the room. “Do you think we could grow or gather enough of these herbs even during winter?”

“We’ll have to have a greenhouse to keep enough of the herbs we need for the heat suppressant anyway,” Anders said. “I don’t see why we couldn’t add a few things.”

“Very nice Hawke,” Varric said grinning. “You provide raw materials that they can’t get down here and they provide you with lyrium.”

“Get us a good deal Varric,” said Devin smiling. “We can talk details later. Good night gentlemen.”

Anders followed Devin out of that room and into the one they had picked earlier. He sat on the bed and removed his boots as Devin stripped to his shirt and trousers. Devin hid one of his daggers under his pillow and Anders’ staff was propped against the headboard on his side of the bed. On his side with Devin behind him, it didn’t take long for him to fall asleep.

They spent three days in the palace in Orzammar. Anders spent most of the first one with Rica, Bhelen’s wife, and Endrin, his son. They stayed in the sleeping area with guards always present, while the others spent the time in the living area. Devin always stayed where he could see Anders as they made their proposal.

The second day was also spent with Rica and Endrin, while the details of the deal were decided on. The boy was well on his way to a full recovery and most of that day was spent playing with him. The third day, Anders spent in their rooms with Devin while a large quantity of lyrium was collected. Because they couldn’t offer any goods yet, this shipment that they needed badly was paid for in coin. Cullen and Sebastian left early that morning bringing the payment and enough of their people to haul the crates back to the wagons.

It was growing late when Devin, Varric and Anders were finally ready to leave. Anders had the cloth tied back around his chest but his hair was still tied back in a simple ponytail. Bethany could change it tomorrow morning before they set off again for Haven. Before they could leave Orzammar, they were approached by an eager red-headed dwarf.

After a brief conversation, Dagna left with them. She was smith caste and very interested in mages. Her skills as a smith were needed and in exchange for these skills, Anders had agreed to sate her curiosity. The Templars with them had all come from diverse backgrounds. Most of them remembered skills taught them by their parents before training and becoming Templars. No one among them knew how to properly work metal or a forge however. Dagna filled that shortcoming nicely.

Anders was ecstatic to see the sun again and extremely happy that nothing bad had happened. He was hopeful that they might actually be able to make this community work. Most of their important needs were finally covered. All that was left was to see what state the abandoned town was in. Even the thought that Meredith might still be following them couldn’t dampen his good mood.


	34. Chapter 34

For the three more weeks it took to get to Haven, Anders spent a good portion of it on the lead wagon. Dagna had asked him question after question, often jogging to keep up, for the first week. Thankfully Karl and Bethany both were able to divert her endless curiosity after he’d become more than a little grumpy. He didn’t mind answering her questions but there always seemed to be more. Anders did manage to ask a few of his own questions however.

It seemed that the alpha or beta status of dwarves in Orzammar was almost completely ignored. A dwarf omega was simply not possible, with one very strange exception, so there was no real reason for it to matter. Their society was run strictly on the caste system that had been in place for centuries. An alpha female born to a casteless female was also casteless. Her status didn’t matter in the slightest.

The dwarves knew about mages but it was similar to how they knew about Qunari, from tales of the surface dwarves allowed to peddle their wares in the common market. Anders was likely the first mage some of them had ever seen. The Warden Commander had been to Orzammar during the blight with the two mages that were in her party of course but they could have blended in amazingly well. There was almost no chance of that for Anders. All the curious stares he’d gotten made a lot more sense.

Because she was alpha, Anders explained about heats almost right off. Dagna did spend a fair amount of time talking with the other alphas, bonded or not, but that was only after the first week. It would also be interesting to see if she would produce a mage. Dwarves were worse than elves when it came to their relationships.

Her bubbly cheerfulness was a welcomed addition among them. The mood since the Templars had caught up with them just outside of Orzammar wasn’t grim in the slightest but it was hard to be gloomy around Dagna. She wasn’t the only reason excitement was high however. The closer they came to their new home the higher their spirits climbed.

Anders himself was also a source of excitement. Sometimes he shared their enthusiasm over his condition but he found himself becoming extremely miserable more often than not. His belly continued to expand the more the babies grew. The robes he wore were running out of room and the babies weren’t as active as they had been. Since there were two it still felt as if he was being prodded a lot. His short journeys into the woods became more frequent, his back ached when he stood or walked for long periods of time and he was tired more often than not. Getting up from a sitting or lying position required a helping hand unless he wanted to look ridiculous. He was definitely looking forward to the birth.

Karl as well as Devin and Bethany were all keeping a close eye on him. Most of the time he didn’t mind their hovering but sometimes he sat in the wagon with Carver to have a moment to himself. They were all concerned and he appreciated that but being worried over like this was a relatively new experience. Sometimes Carver’s silent presence was soothing.

There had been no sign of anyone following them since Orzammar. In the three weeks of travel the mages had found and replanted in pots many of the herbs that would be traded to Orzammar. More of the heat suppressant had been made while he had been in the underground city and they had enough to last them until they actually reached the village. Their people were being divided by skills and plans were being made to get Haven livable again. A group for planting food crops, a group for seeing to the many potted herbs, a group that could fix or reinforce existing buildings and one that would set to work building a wall around the settlement.

It was expected that they would reach the village in the next day or so. Dagna was currently quizzing Karl ahead, Bethany was walking with Fenris behind and that left Devin walking with him. Since there was little to do until they actually reached Haven, he and Devin had been discussing names for the babies.

Ever since they had discovered that he carried twins, Karl had begun checking him regularly. They were smaller than average but that was to be expected. He reported that they still appeared healthy and there was definitely a boy and a girl. Between them, they had eliminated using the names of Devin’s parents or any of Anders’ siblings. They had been tossing names back and forth for most of a week and had finally decided on a girl’s name. Their daughters name would be Evelyn Hawke. Deciding on a boy’s name was proving to be just as difficult.

“Fredrick?” Devin suggested.

Anders arched an eyebrow and frowned as he shook his head. They were walking next to the lead wagon, through an area that was heavily forested. Hopefully a clearing could be found somewhere near the village to use as farmland. He thought for a moment and made a suggestion. “Zeke?”

Devin thought for a moment and shook his head. They walked on each sifting through names silently when Cullen and Keran came up to them at a run. Anders didn’t think there was a problem because both of them seemed thrilled.

“Hawke,” Cullen said happily if a little winded. “We’ve made it. Haven is about half a day’s journey away.”

“Brilliant!” exclaimed Hawke. “Keran, go find Fenris and Sebastian. Stop the wagons here and make camp.”

Keran dashed off and Cullen made his way down the line of wagons. Devin turned to him and said, “We’ll have to continue this later little rabbit.”

“Where are you going?” asked Anders thinking his good mood was about to plummet.

“We need to check the village first,” Devin said gently. “Make sure that nothing dangerous has moved in.”

Anders forced a smile he didn’t feel. “I guess I’ll wait here.”

“We’ll be back soon,” said Devin quietly. He placed a hand on his belly and kissed him on the cheek. “When I know it’s safe.”

“I know,” he sighed. “Take Karl with you at least.”

“I will,” Devin said. He rubbed the top of Anders’ belly and smirked. “Keep thinking. Evelyn’s brother still needs a name.”

Anders nodded absently and watched him walk off into a crowd that was forming. He turned and went a short distance into the woods and lowered himself carefully onto a stump. Sighing as he rubbed the small of his back, he stretched his legs out and scowled. He watched the activity around him thinking how much he hated feeling useless.

He sat there alone for a while as camp was made and a number of them kept going forward. It would probably be tomorrow before they returned or sent a messenger to let the rest of them know the village was safe. The people left behind went about their business with excited conversations but there were a few that always kept him in sight. None but Bethany dared approach.

She sat on the ground, leaning against the stump he sat on. Anders shifted on the stump, rubbing his back again before sitting up a little straighter. Bethany was watching him fidget and her sympathetic smile only made him feel worse. After a few more minutes of silence he finally looked down at her and said, “What?”

“You looked like you might need some company,” she said steadily.

“I don’t want company,” he snapped glumly. “I want to go with him.”

“I know how you feel,” she said nudging his leg with her shoulder. “Fenris didn’t want me to go either.”

“At least you can help here,” Anders said. “No one will let me do anything more strenuous than peel potatoes.”

“We’re just excited. The first children…born free,” said Bethany. Her soft smile turned into a smirk that looked a lot like Devin’s. “I think they’re going to have lots of aunts and uncles.”

“It’s just…annoying. I hate not doing anything. I hate this dress…this whole stupid disguise. I want this to work as much as everyone else and it’s frustrating that I can’t help!”

“Anders, at the moment there isn’t much you _can_ do that won’t put you or the babies in danger.”

He sighed and scrubbed his face with his hands. “I know that Bethany. It’s just...frustrating.”

“I’m sure we can find something for you to do when we get there.”

“I hope so,” Anders said. He sat up straight again rubbing the top of his belly. “Stop kicking me so hard,” he grumbled quietly. “I’m going to need that.”

Bethany giggled and they fell quiet again. He didn’t feel much better knowing that there were eight more weeks at most left of this. There probably was something that he could do when they got there. He sincerely hoped there was because time seemed to drag by as it was.

“How are you and Fenris getting along?” he asked after a while.

“I think he’s still nervous,” Bethany said. “I think he’s coming around though.”

“You’ve decided then?”

“Yes,” she said smiling hopefully. “He’s really sweet when you get past the prickly exterior. I haven’t asked him…Devin said it would be better to let him bring it up.”

“Devin’s probably right,” said Anders finally smiling. “I almost can’t wait to hear the village full of children.” He placed a hand on her shoulder and she looked up at him. “Thank you Bethany.”

She smiled and nudged his leg again. “Listen to my hormonal ranting and we’ll call it even.”

“Deal,” he said smiling wider. “Now help me think of a name. Evelyn was Carver’s suggestion after all.”


	35. Chapter 35

It was Devin who returned the next day. Anders had been pacing the trail waiting and wondering why he could smell smoke. He was relieved to see that Devin was unhurt and learned that the reason he could smell smoke was they had set one of the remaining houses on fire. Karl and a couple of other mages were still there watching so that it didn’t spread. Apparently this house had contained a substantial quantity of what looked like dried blood. All had agreed to destroy the house in the hopes any remaining evil would die in the fire.

The worst thing they had come across in the abandoned village was a very large bear. It was naturally unhappy at being disturbed and they had had to kill the poor thing. Devin reported that bear meat was edible and the hide would make a fine rug for the Templar who had dealt the killing blow. There were many smaller creatures that had moved in when the humans had moved out, rabbits, mice and other small rodents that could easily be gotten rid of.

Camp was broken and Devin led the way back to their new home. It was late when they reached Haven. The house that had been burned was a skeletal pile of burnt timbers and ash that would be cleared away in the morning. That first night was spent on the ground but Anders didn’t mind. He was stuck with the robes, nothing else would fit, but now that they were home he didn’t need to disguise himself any longer.

The cloth tied around his chest was taken off that night. When they woke in the morning he tied his hair back in a simple ponytail and set about to find something he could do to help. Since he generally woke later than most, the village was already bustling with activity. Devin, Cullen and Karl had their heads together deciding where best to put the wall around the village. There were people clearing land along the bottom section for crops, cutting down trees to use for the wall and repairs that the existing buildings needed.

The bottom section of Haven consisted mainly of houses. There was enough clear land for crops and the lake would provide fresh water and fish. He made his way up to the middle section and it was here that he saw the team of people that were to clean and repair the buildings. They were concentrating on a large building that looked like it might be the center of the village. It was here that he found Bethany and Sebastian.

“Anders,” Bethany said waving him over. She was standing by the door of the building and he slowly hurried over. His walk had become more of a waddle that slowed him further. “Have you suggested the name we came up with yet?”

“Not yet,” he said stopping beside her. “I was more interested in hearing about Haven. I’ll ask tonight though. What’s going on here?”

“You have to ask sooner than that!” she exclaimed tugging him inside. “I want to know if he likes it. We’ve decided to make this building the infirmary.”

Sebastian was inside, using a broom to knock cobwebs off of the ceiling while two others were going through the things that had been left here. He looked over at them when he heard Bethany. “Anders, I’m glad you’re here,” he said smiling.

“Hello Sebastian,” said Anders. “I thought you were going to work on the houses first.”

“The weather has been pleasant enough,” Sebastian said. “Spending more time under the stars won’t harm anyone. We’ll concentrate on housing after this is ready. It looks as if you might need this soon.”

“Hopefully not,” Anders said rubbing his belly. “I’ve still got a month and a half left I think. I suppose it will be good for everyone to know where to go if something happens.”

“It will give you something to do as well,” said Bethany smiling. “We’ll get it cleaned and fixed, and then you and Feynriel can get it set up.”

“Is there anything I can do now?” he asked hopefully.

“Yes,” said Bethany with a grin. “You can go find Devin and ask him about that name!”

“Oh fine,” said Anders rolling his eyes and smiling.

“If it’s not too much bother,” Sebastian said before he could turn back to the door. “We could use some fresh water.”

“Won’t be a bother at all,” Anders said happily. “I’m just glad I can help.”

It looked as if the building had been a shop in its former life. There were plenty of shelves for the supplies they had and room for more cots than the few they had. The back room could be converted, without many changes, into a birthing suite. It was a little scary that he would be the first to need it.

Anders spent that morning hauling water with one of the younger children. There were frequent rests along the way. The first bucket was used for cleaning but he found a second to bring them drinking water. A few of the other younger children joined him and soon there were three buckets of drinking water making the rounds all over the village.

When the sun was high overhead everyone gathered for lunch. Devin appeared beside him and pulled him up to the front of the crowd. He whistled to get their attention and the hum of idle conversation ceased.

With an arm around his shoulders, Devin said loudly, “Cullen’s scouts have found no trace of anyone else following us. It seems we are out of immediate danger.” A cheer went up and Devin paused until they quieted again. “The village needs a lot of work but we can make this place our home and show the rest of Thedas that mages don’t have to be locked away. Bonded mages, feel free to stop using the heat suppressant. Unbonded mages, it will be readily available until you find your alpha.”

Excited chatter erupted when Devin finished and they broke up into their families or pairs. The mood was joyful and Anders hoped that the children he carried would be the first of many. After getting their plates filled, Devin took him to the edge of the crowd so that he could sit on a crate while they ate. Bethany and Fenris sat nearby and she gave him a pointed look.

“Devin,” Anders said turning to look at him. “How about Flynn?”

“Hmm,” Devin hummed looking thoughtful. “Evelyn and Flynn.” He nodded after a moment and smirked up at Anders from where he sat on the ground. “I like it.” Bethany giggled and Anders grinned. Devin raised an eyebrow and looked at her. “Your suggestion?” he asked wryly.

She nodded happily and said, “We put our heads together yesterday to come up with it.”

“I think that we’re ready to meet them now,” Devin said. “We’ve got plenty of diapers and clothes, only one crib but there should be plenty of room for both of them for a while. Evelyn and Flynn…I think I’m more excited now than I ever have been.”

“Me too,” Anders said softly. “I’m getting nervous as well.”

“Don’t worry Anders,” Bethany said comfortingly. “Karl is a very good healer.”

“I know, I just hope they don’t come too early,” he said anxiously. “I think I’ll find a nice spot for a nap after lunch.”

“I’m sure they’ll be fine,” Devin said soothingly. “Our bedroll is still set up and it’s out of the way.”


	36. Chapter 36

The first bonded pair disappeared only ten days after they had arrived in Haven. Four days later they came back safely from the woods and the mage had spent another sleeping in Anders’ new clinic while her alpha went back to work. The clinic was the only building that had been declared habitable so far. Everyone was hopeful that the couple would be expecting. Only time would tell.

During those two weeks, the cleaning and repair team had moved on to one of the houses. Anders had spent most of it bringing water to everyone until he’d started having contractions. Karl managed to stop them, much to everyone’s relief, and he’d been banished to the clinic. He was given a very stern warning to rest often and Devin stopped just short of demanding that he stay put. Anders wasn’t sure how to feel about being put on bed rest. It was difficult watching everyone else working hard around him and not being able to help in some way. He was loathe to do too much physical labor however because the contractions had scared him badly. It was still too early.

He wasn’t alone or very idle however. Now that he had time and they weren’t traveling, Feynriel had been spending quite a bit of time with him. Anders took the opportunity to begin teaching him after the clinic had been set up and stocked with supplies. He looked much better now than when they had still been outside of Orzammar. During the following two weeks Anders discovered Feynriel would be adept at healing but he wasn’t entirely sure the boy could be a spirit healer. His sleep wasn’t as broken by demons but he was still plagued with them.

Devin came by at least twice a day and sometimes three. The rogue always brought him lunch and they often ate outside just in front of the clinic. They had also been sleeping in the clinic because it was so hard for Anders to get up and down off of the ground. His belly still grew but it seemed to have slowed somewhat. It was a good thing too because the robes he wore were now a bit tight.

Overall, Sebastian’s decision to get the clinic cleaned and fixed first was a sound one. It wasn’t nearly as busy as his Darktown clinic had been but there were plenty of smashed fingers and a few cuts that he’d had to deal with. The house they had finished was on the edge of town and they had moved on to another one. At the moment it was being occupied a mage who’d gone into heat and his alpha. The village leaders, Devin, Karl and Cullen, had all agreed it was far safer to use the house rather than disappear into the woods.

It presented an interesting side effect. The other alphas of the village were still affected by the proximity of an omega in heat. Because the mage already had an alpha with them that call wasn’t nearly as bad as it would have been with an unbonded mage. They were able to resist interrupting but Anders suspected it wasn’t just Devin that had become more than a little stimulated. Devin, however, was just as frustrated as unattached alphas likely were. They hadn’t been cautioned against sexual activity but neither of them was willing to risk it.

As a result, work on the wall surrounding Haven had boomed every time the house was occupied. Devin, Fenris and all the other alphas who didn’t have a mate, put as much distance between themselves and the heat house as possible.

It was mid-afternoon now and Anders stood outside the clinic. Most of the morning had been spent wondering if the slight twinges he felt in his back and the tightening in his gut would warrant sending Feynriel to find Karl. Thankfully the pains had stopped. He stood outside rubbing his belly and watching the hive of activity below him.

Carver worked the crop fields with those that had been chosen for the task. Sebastian and Bethany were working on a second house that was nearly finished. A little closer to the clinic, a greenhouse was being carefully erected from plans that Anders, Bethany and Karl remembered of the one at Kinloch Hold. Fenris and Cullen could be seen every so often working on the wall. Varric had left a few days ago with a couple of his students to see if they could acquire some livestock.

Everyone was busy doing something, even the children, some of them running errands or fetching things and his water bearers. The joyful excitement hadn’t waned a bit and he would have liked to feel that same way. Deep down he did but most of his attention had been taken lately with worried nerves. Off and on for the last week he had been having contractions. They were nothing like the big scare that had the whole village nervous nearly three weeks ago.

Anders had hardly left the clinic for fear of starting them up again in earnest. He was scared of the babies coming too early but he was also becoming more eager for the day he would give birth. They needed as much time as possible but he was certain that day wasn’t far off.

Feynriel was usually nearby and for the last few days he had taken care of the patients that came in. Anders had spent most of his time lately watching everyone else work and trying not to snap at people in his apprehensive misery. It wasn’t their fault he was so big, a little clumsy and tired all the time. He was currently watching Devin climb the path to the middle section of the village.

“Hello Devin,” he said when the rogue was close enough.

“How are you?” Devin said sounding a little concerned.

“Fine for the moment,” Anders said as he turned to sit in a chair that had been placed near the doors of the clinic for him. “They’ve stopped.”

Devin looked immensely relieved as he crouched down next to him. “Fenris has been asking me questions all morning,” he said finally smiling.

“What about?” Anders asked curiously.

“Bethany,” he said with a smirk. “I think he might be just about ready to do it.”

“That’s what Bethany wants,” said Anders shrugging. “I think it’s amazing he’s considering bonding with her…all things considered. It’s been what…four or five months since they met?”

“Something like that,” Devin said nodding. “It might take a while longer though. I think he’s struggling with something.”

“They’ll have plenty of time,” said Anders. “No one’s going to push them into it.”

Devin chuckled and they lapsed into comfortable silence. “You realize he will be family,” he said suddenly. “If he actually goes through with it.”

“That thought had crossed my mind,” said Anders smiling. “Fenris and I may never see eye to eye but we’ve kept the peace for months. I’m sure we can at least get along.”

“It won’t be as easy for you to avoid each other,” said Devin.

Anders shrugged. From what he’d seen, bonding was what both Fenris and Bethany wanted. It was understandable that the elf was hesitant. He had suffered much at the hands of a mage he was bonded to previously. A few hang ups were sort of expected. Fenris wasn’t something he was going to think about now however.

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it,” he said smiling.

Devin nodded and after a moment stood abruptly. “Do you think you can handle a pleasant surprise?”

“Sure,” Anders said holding out his hand.

He was pulled up and Devin led him slowly down the path. “Bethany and the others have finished the house they were working on,” said Devin. “Without my knowledge, everyone has decided that it’s going to be ours.”

“What’s wrong with staying in the clinic?” asked Anders. “Until we get some more cots there’s plenty of room.”

“Nothing that I can see,” Devin said with a shrug. “They’re pretty adamant about it though.”

“Is there a bed?” he asked hopefully.

“Bethany said there was,” said Devin smirking. “I haven’t actually been inside of it either. I thought we could go together and sort out our things.”

The thought of actually sleeping in a bed again made him a little giddy with excitement. There was nothing wrong with sleeping on the cot except that they wouldn’t both fit. Until he actually gave birth, his belly was simply too big. Sorting through their various belongings probably wouldn’t be that taxing either.

There was no one at the house when they got there. The front door opened on a large living area on one side and a smaller kitchen area on the other. A sturdy looking table sat in the kitchen but there were no chairs to go with it. A few side tables lined the walls along with an empty bookshelf in the living area. In front of the hearth sat a bench.

There were two doors that led out of the living area, one to a large master bedroom and the other to a smaller bedroom. Anders saw that there was indeed a rather large bed in the master bedroom and he smiled, wondering what they had stuffed the mattress with. The crib Devin had mentioned was already set up and pushed against the wall beside the bed. There was room for another in spite of the two wardrobes that sat against another wall. The smaller bedroom had a wardrobe and a much smaller bed.

He sat on the bench in front of the cold hearth while Devin went to bring in a box of their things. It was very cozy he thought, not spread out like the estate in Kirkwall had been. They might have to add another room when Evelyn and Flynn grew a bit but that was years away. In all, this house was more than he’d ever hoped for. It was a little sad that he wouldn’t be able to grow old with Devin here but hopefully the taint would spare him long enough to at least see his children grown with their own children.


	37. Chapter 37

The next eleven days passed with slow regularity. Work on the village was continued, another house almost finished, the wall a third of the way around, crops growing, the greenhouse half finished. One of the first mages to go into heat was confirmed pregnant and the people were happy despite the hard work all of them did. This day, work continued, but it seemed as if the village held its breath.

Devin and Anders had settled into their new home quickly but still ate most of their meals with the others. Over the last eleven days Anders had still gone to the clinic to do what little he could. He made another batch of heat suppressant, taught Feynriel, rested often and worried constantly. Today, he had remained in their house. The contractions he had felt were often weak and very random until this morning.

Since Karl had managed to stop his labor the first time, he had been checking Anders every few days. Just yesterday he’d said if labor began this time he wouldn’t try to stop it. Karl had been sent for early in the day, and had recommended that Anders remain at home where he could be comfortable until they were certain. Devin had remained at the house with him, providing a comforting distraction from the pain that was coming closer together and more intense. It was clear to Anders shortly before noon that they would be meeting their children today.

Just after lunch, which neither he nor Devin had, Anders was slowly moved to the clinic. The working noises around the village could still be heard as they made their way slowly up the path. There were pauses when the pain was at its worst. Karl was already there when they finally reached it and after a very brief explanation confirmed what Anders already knew.

A few more hours passed, the contractions coming closer together until they were near constant. On his back with his robes bunched around his waist, Devin held one leg up and a decidedly green Feynriel held the other. Anders gripped the sides of the narrow bed that he lay upon, sweat beading on his brow, listening to Devin’s comforting words and Karl’s encouraging ones. He squeezed his eyes shut with every push, breathing in short little bursts between contractions.

After what felt like ages, their daughter took her first breath and wailed out her displeasure. Anders took comfort in her cries as she was wrapped and handed to Devin. Even Feynriel smiled as Evelyn cried, her hands bunched into fists. Devin stayed near, Evelyn held securely in the crook of one arm, still holding his leg up, and the work continued. Minutes later, Flynn added to her cries. His weren’t nearly as enthusiastic as his sister, still bellowing as loudly as she could. Flynn was wrapped and given to Anders who looked him over worriedly. Anders couldn’t see anything obviously wrong with him. He was simply less vocal than Evelyn.

Karl finished with him and he was helped to sit part of the way up, his skirts pulled down over his legs. Feynriel was sent to spread the good news. Devin reluctantly gave Evelyn back to Karl and followed them while he gave her a checkup. Anders lay back on the pillows he had been propped up on, listening as her crying finally began to dwindle, and observed his son.

The wispy hair on his head was dark brown, his eyes the same amber color of his own staring up at him from a face that reminded him of Devin. Flynn gripped his finger when Anders touched the tiny palm of his hand.

“Are you a mage I wonder?” he said quietly.

“I hope one of them is,” Devin said crossing the short distance between them with Evelyn held carefully in his arms.

Karl had followed him and smiled as he reached for Flynn. “She’s a little small but she seems healthy,” he said as the small infant changed hands. “I’ll just check him out and then leave you alone for a bit.”

Anders smiled his thanks before Karl moved away. “Here,” Devin said placing Evelyn in his waiting arms. “She’s still a bit fussy.”

She was just as small as Flynn, her hair the same dark brown but a bit thicker, eyes the same bright blue of Carvers and her face reminded him of Devin as well. Devin squeezed his shoulder before following Karl once more. Anders winced as he sat up, placing Evelyn on the bed between his legs. He quickly worked the buttons on his robes as she began crying again. Soon enough she was suckling quietly and he hardly noticed when Karl left.

Devin stood by him, their son sleeping peacefully in his father’s arms, and smiled. “Karl says he’s fine,” he said. “How are you feeling?”

“Tired,” Anders replied softly. “Glad they seem to be okay. Very glad to have it done.”

“We’ll be home soon little rabbit,” Devin said.

There was a knock on the door followed by its opening moments later. Bethany came through first followed closely by Carver. Her face lit up when she saw the babies and she hurried over to Anders’ other side. Even Carver’s normal sullen glower had been replaced with a smile but he stayed by the shut door.

“They’re so little!” Bethany exclaimed quietly.

“You and Carver were probably just as small,” Devin said smirking. “This one here is Flynn and Anders has Evelyn. Get over here Carver. You won’t see them from over there.”

Carver took a few steps closer to Devin looking from one infant to the other. “They are small,” he said softly. “As big as he was, I expected them to be a little bigger.”

“Together they probably weigh more than an average infant,” Anders explained patiently. Evelyn had finally drifted off to sleep and he repositioned her so that he could rub her back.

“Since they had to share everything they’re smaller than normal,” Devin said. “Don’t worry Carver they won’t stay little for long.”

“Can I hold her?” Bethany asked eagerly reaching for Evelyn tentatively.

Anders smiled and nodded. She changed hands with little fuss and without waking. He leaned back on the pillows behind him and yawned. Carver moved around the bed to stand next to Bethany.

“She has Father’s eyes,” Devin said grinning as he passed Anders Flynn. “I just hope she isn’t as cranky as you.”

Carver scowled at him and Bethany giggled. Anders couldn’t help but smile as he tried to coax Flynn awake enough to eat. He listened to their lighthearted banter and stifled a giggle when Bethany talked Carver into holding Evelyn. He looked extremely uncomfortable with one large hand supporting her head and back and the other supporting her bottom. Devin snorted in amusement as he repositioned the baby so that she rested in the crook of his arm.

When they left the clinic, Carver still held Evelyn and Anders had Flynn. Quite a crowd had gathered and they cheered which startled the twins. Flynn settled quickly but Evelyn settled only after Devin had her. Talk around him was interrupted by Varric pushing his way through the crowd.

“We need to talk,” he said grimly when he was close enough. “Somewhere a little less…public…would be better.”

Devin’s frown was almost certainly a match for his own. He hadn’t even been aware that Varric had made it back yet. At a gesture Varric led the way back to their home. Anders sat gingerly on the bench with Devin sitting next to him. Carver and Bethany dispersed the crowd and joined them in the house after a few minutes.

“I told them they could visit in little groups,” Carver said when the door was firmly shut behind him. “Karl recommended at least a week’s rest.”

“All right Varric,” Devin said grimly. “What’s up?”

“You know I’ve been sending letters to Aveline,” said Varric from his place by the mantle. “I told her to send the next one to Redcliffe and that’s where we went. Got a good deal on some cattle and pigs and I even managed to get a few cats. Anyway, there were two letters waiting from Aveline. After her failed retrieval attempt Meredith was demoted. She has since disappeared from Kirkwall.”

“Damn,” Devin swore quietly.

“She’s trying to find us,” Carver said assuredly. “She’ll head to Orzammar and track us from there.”

“Almost two months,” Devin said. “She’s probably already in Orzammar. Will Bhelen talk?”

“Doubtful,” said Varric shaking his head. “That doesn’t mean someone else won’t. We never told anyone where we were going but we weren’t that subtle about it either.”

“What about Dagna’s family?” Bethany asked looking a little pale. “They might have said something. Won’t they want her to come back?”

“She’s a surface dwarf now Sunshine,” Varric explained. “Even if they do want her back Dagna won’t be allowed back in. They might not even know where she went.”

“Carver, go find Cullen and bring him back here,” Devin said. “Bethany, you go find Karl. If either of you sees Fenris and Sebastian send them over too. It looks like we have some planning to do.”


	38. Chapter 38

After a very long discussion it was decided that finishing the wall that would surround the village had to be done as quickly as possible. The fewer ways Meredith had to get into the village the better chance they had to deal with her. A chosen few would take care of the crops and animals and everyone else, minus the various couples in the heat house, would be working on the wall.

Anders was never happier to put on a pair of pants but didn’t usually bother putting a shirt on. Most of his shirts didn’t button up the front. When he had to go somewhere, Anders usually wore one of Devin’s that did. Over the next two weeks there wasn’t much cause to go anywhere however.

He found that he had his hands full taking care of two newborns. Evelyn woke around every three hours. Her demanding wails never failed to wake Flynn and he added his quieter but no less insistent cries. In the middle of the night, Devin often consoled Flynn while Anders changed and fed Evelyn. Trying to feed them both at the same time proved to require a bit more coordination than he had. Flynn was easily placated however and seemed much more patient than his sister was. If she wasn’t full and dry she simply wasn’t happy.

When they weren’t demanding food or a clean diaper, they slept peacefully. Anders ended up sleeping with them when he could. With Feynriel helping to work on the wall the clinic had unofficially moved to Devin and Anders’ house. If the twins weren’t crying he was often woke by a knock on the door. He took care of them without complaint and they always peeked at the twins before they left.

As tired as he was, Anders was happy in spite of Meredith’s unavoidable arrival. His children were healthy and Devin seemed happy. Working on the wall was very important and that’s where Devin spent most of the next two weeks. He always brought Anders’ meals though and helped with the babies if they woke while he was there. The children always received a kiss from him before he left again.

It was fairly late in the day now. The sun was setting and supper had been eaten long ago. Devin had Evelyn resting on his shoulder, a rag under her to catch anything that came up with the air she had also swallowed. He stood near the bed, shifting his weight from foot to foot as he rubbed her back. Anders sat on the bed feeding Flynn.

“How much of the wall still needs to be done?” Anders asked quietly.

“About a fourth,” Devin said. “Getting up around the top tier of the village was the hardest bit but I think it won’t be long now.”

“Has Cullen gotten the guard rotation figured out yet?”

“Mostly,” said Devin smirking. “There are enough beta and unattached alpha Templars here to cover the gate and the dock consistently but they wouldn’t get much time to themselves. The poor man’s been running around after supper trying to get a line on everyone’s heat cycles.”

“Devin,” said Anders thoughtfully after a moment. “This is going to sound like an odd question…but…when am I going to go into heat again? In the circle, after the baby is born and taken away it usually took four to six weeks for the heat cycles to start again.”

“I’m not sure,” Devin said apologetically. “I wasn’t very old when Bethany and Carver were born.” After another pause he asked curiously, “Has anyone else come up pregnant?”

“Elin,” Anders said smiling. “He was so happy when he left today.”

“That makes two,” said Devin with a wide grin. “We might have a new couple soon.”

“Fenris and Bethany?”

“Keran and Feynriel,” said Devin sounding amused. “They’re both a little young but there’s definitely something there.”

“That might be good for Feynriel,” Anders said after a moment of thought. Flynn had stopped suckling and he carefully repositioned the infant to burp him. “It’s not as bad but he’s told me demons still bother him.”

“That might be bad for Keran,” Devin said frowning slightly. He turned to the crib and carefully lowered Evelyn into it. She fussed a little but quieted quickly when Devin rubbed her tummy. Her blanket was pulled up and tucked around her. “Do you have any idea why?” Devin asked looking over at him.

Anders shook his head and began patting Flynn’s back. “You remember what Merrill said, that you give us reasons to resist. Perhaps bonding will offer him some protection until we can figure out why.”

“Perhaps,” said Devin. “I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.”

“There we are,” Anders said softly when Flynn burped. “Hand me the rag please.” Devin pulled the rag off of his shoulder and held it out to him. Anders wiped them both clean and carefully stood.

Flynn didn’t fuss at all when Anders lowered him into the crib and tucked his blanket around him. Devin put his arm around Anders’ waist as they stood there, watching their children sleep. Anders was filled with peaceful contentment and he sighed happily when Devin moved to stand behind him. Arms circled him and Anders leaned back against him, letting his head rest on Devin’s shoulder.

“I know you’re tired,” Devin said after a brief moment of silence. “But they’re asleep now.”

Anders could feel his lips just below his ear. Devin’s arms tightened around him as he placed light kisses there before he pulled away slightly. More light kisses down his neck and Devin’s hands slid across his slightly loose stomach to rest on his hips. Anders tilted his head, allowing him more access as desire began to settle through him.

“Please, please, please tell me you’re not too sore,” said Devin desperately after a few more kisses down his neck. “We’re fairly close to the heat house and I’m being driven crazy.”

“Devin,” he said breathlessly.

“Please little rabbit,” Devin said quietly. He began sucking at the soft spot on Anders’ neck where it met his shoulder.

“Keep doing that and you’ll have me ready in seconds,” said Anders with a shudder.

Devin hummed happily and lavished attention on his neck with lips, teeth and tongue. His hands roamed across Anders’ torso pausing on his hips every so often to rut gently against his arse. Anders moaned softly and bit his bottom lip.

“Shhhh,” Devin murmured as he walked them slowly back towards the bed. “Don’t want to wake them.”

Anders nodded and they paused to remove their remaining clothing. On his side with Devin behind him, Anders twisted around and they kissed. Their tongues slid together and he moaned softly again when he felt Devin’s fingers at his slick entrance. After a brief amount of preparation, Anders felt his lover’s thick cock.

“Still so perfect,” Devin groaned quietly. His slow push in stopped at the knot towards the base of his cock.

“Don’t stop,” Anders whimpered. “We’ll be okay…they should sleep for a couple of hours at least.”

Devin held his hips with one hand, the other snaked under Anders’ head and across his chest. His knot passed through and he quickly swallowed Anders’ moan with another passionate kiss. Gentle thrusts, soft moans and quiet panting, strong arms wrapped around him, he was soon biting his hand to keep quiet. A few strokes to his cock and Anders fell over the edge, Devin’s breathing heavy in his ear and his soft grunt as he came shortly after.

“Love you little rabbit,” Devin sighed contentedly as he settled behind Anders.

“I love you too Devin,” Anders whispered, already half asleep.

***

A few days later Anders was woke by a knock at the door. He yawned as he checked on Evelyn and Flynn. They were both still sleeping and he made his way to the door. Another knock sounded before he could get there and he was very surprised to see Fenris on the other side. The elf wasn’t wearing his usual spiky armor, just simple clothes that would be easy to work in. He looked uncomfortable but unhurt.

“Can I help you Fenris?” Anders asked calmly gesturing for him to come in.

“I have been…sent away,” he said softly the tips of his ears turning pink.

Anders was instantly nervous and wished he had on more than a pair of trousers. The section of wall they were working on was still fairly close to the heat house which didn’t stay unoccupied for very long. He was fairly certain he knew why Fenris had been sent away and sort of hoped for Devin to appear out of thin air. Some of this must have been read clearly on his face.

“You’re safe,” Fenris said irritably as he crossed the room to the bench in front of the cold fireplace. “That problem has been taken care of…for the moment.”

“So why are you here?” Anders asked cautiously without moving from his position by the open door.

“I do not wish to go back,” Fenris said looking up at him, his eyes haunted. “It’s been a long time since I’ve felt your pull so constantly.”

Anders had no idea what to say and was rather glad when Evelyn chose that moment to wake. Flynn began crying moments later. “Excuse me,” he mumbled and hurried into the bedroom. He changed Flynn’s diaper first. While he was changing Evelyn, both infants still squalling, Fenris appeared in the bedroom doorway.

“Do you…require assistance?” Fenris asked hesitantly.

He paused for only a moment. It was still very possible that this elf would be an uncle to his children. “Could you hold Flynn while I feed Evelyn?”

Fenris nodded and crossed the room. Anders finished pinning Evelyn’s diaper and picked her up as he joined him at the crib. The warrior handled Flynn with a calm confidence that spoke of experience. Flynn’s cries grew silent as Fenris shushed him quietly, slowly turning at the waist until he was quiet and blinking owlishly at the unfamiliar person who held him. Anders held Evelyn securely as he watched Fenris. Her head rested in the crook of his arm, one of her hands grasping at his side, and the other resting on his chest as she suckled greedily.

“How many children have you fathered?” Anders asked softly.

“Four that I am positive were mine,” said Fenris glancing up at Anders. His gaze quickly returned to the infant in his arms. “Only two were his. I was…bred…several times.”

“That’s…” Anders began in a horrified whisper.

“Normal in Tevinter,” Fenris interrupted. “I believe some were hoping I would produce another alpha elf. I have watched you.” Fenris turned an intense gaze on Anders. “You are unlike any mage I’ve known. I was positive at first it was an act. Carefully crafted deception to wind Hawke around your fingers.”

Movement in the living room caught Anders’ eye. Devin stood in the doorway. His finger went to his lips and he watched Fenris, who was facing away from the door, with a small frown. Anders turned his attention back to Fenris.

“Why did you lie?” Fenris asked seriously.

“Devin knew all along,” Anders said. “He’s the one that came up with it…I simply corroborated it. He didn’t turn me in or lock me away somewhere. Devin let me stay free.”

He nodded and remained quiet. Fenris’ eyes returned to Flynn, who was now sleeping again. The corners of his mouth pulled down for a moment and he continued thoughtfully. “I have been asking myself what I want. After so much torment…can I really tie myself to another mage?”

“What’s the answer?” Devin said calmly from the doorway.

Fenris half turned, his eyebrows climbing his forehead in surprise before he smiled. “I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised,” he said sounding amused.

“No,” Devin said his wolfish grin appearing. “You shouldn’t be.”

“I’m not sure if I can,” Fenris said as his frown reappeared. “I feel their pull…but she is what I want.”

“Take a chance Fenris,” Anders said earnestly. “We aren’t like them. Surely you’ve seen that by now.”

“It’s what Bethany wants,” Devin said leaning in the doorway.

“I know,” he said quietly. “She is everything Danarius wasn’t. Kind, innocent, beautiful…patient.” As he spoke, slowly Fenris smiled. “Perhaps I will. Where is Bethany?”

“I think she’s in the fields,” said Devin stepping forward holding his arms out for Flynn.

“Thank you,” he said. The sleeping infant changed hands peacefully and Fenris turned to the door, determination shining in his eyes and a spring in his step that hadn’t been there when he’d arrived.


	39. Chapter 39

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Character Death.

Only a few hours later, Bethany burst through the door with only the briefest of knocks. Her cheeks were flushed her eyes were bright and she wore the biggest smile he had ever seen from her. He was fully dressed and in their living area looking for something he could carry one of the twins in. Anders braced himself with only a moment’s notice as she slammed into him, her arms flying around him.

“He’s going to do it!” she said excitedly pulling him around in a spin.

“Shh, the babies,” Anders said smiling as he laughed guiding them to a stop.

“Oh!” Bethany exclaimed quieter. “I’m so sorry I hope I didn’t wake them!”

Anders gave her a brief hug and held her at arm’s length. “Doesn’t sound like it. Fenris found you I take it?”

“He did,” she said her eyes sparkling. “He wants to be my alpha!”

“I’m glad,” he said. “How long do you have to wait?”

“A week and a half,” pouted Bethany. “It’s going to go by so slowly.”

Bethany plopped heavily onto the bench and Anders sat next to her chuckling. “You’ll have the rest of your life with him. A week and a half isn’t so long.”

“How long did you have to wait?” she asked curiously.

“A couple of days,” said Anders smiling wryly. “Our bonding wasn’t exactly planned.”

“It wasn’t?” Bethany said her eyes widening in surprise. “You both get along so well. I thought you two were like the rest of the couples here. That you wanted to bond.”

“I believe we did,” said Anders taking her hand. “The choice was taken out of our hands. Isabela snuck into my clinic two days before I was due. She stole all of my potions, including the bottles of heat suppressant I had just made. I didn’t have any more of the ingredients and it would have taken too long to gather them and then brew the potion. Our bonding would have happened eventually, I’m positive of that. It would have been much later however.”

She nodded looking thoughtful. “That’s how you stayed out so long isn’t it? The heat suppressant.”

“It is,” Anders said. He took her hand and smiled. “Enough about that. Since you’re here would you help me find a basket or something to carry the babies in? I’d like to go to the clinic and check on a few things.”

“I think I know where we can find a couple actually. A couple more questions first,” she said. “What’s it like?”

“Going into heat?” Anders asked. Bethany nodded, now looking a little nervous. Anders squeezed her hand and smiled reassuringly. “It’s not that bad. I only half remember those four days but Devin barricaded us into my clinic. The only thing I wanted was sex, a want so great it was almost a need.”

“Does…the knot…hurt?”

“Maybe a little at first,” Anders said standing and pulling her to her feet as well. “Trust me, after that first bit though…” He wiggled his eyebrows, pausing for effect. “…it feels absolutely wonderful.” Her eyes grew wide and the blush on her cheeks reappeared. “Come on. Let’s go find those baskets.”

Bethany nodded and smoothed her skirts over her hips as they walked into the bedroom, excitement overpowering the nerves once more. The baskets were fairly easy to find and perfect. They were strong, tightly laced wicker with a sturdy handle. Evelyn and Flynn fit perfectly in them even with the blankets that they were wrapped up in. Even with such mild spring weather it didn’t take much for them to get cold.

So far sheer exhaustion had kept him inside most of the time but he found that he was growing used to it. Now that he had a way to carry both babies safely, Anders planned on returning to the clinic during the day. It would also be easier to see how much progress had been made on the wall and to socialize with everyone else.

News of Fenris and Bethany’s upcoming bonding spread fast. The nervous gloom that had settled over the village since news of Meredith was now interspersed with happy excitement. Work on the wall continued for the next ten days and Anders began leaving with Devin in the morning to go to the clinic. He still napped when he could but the twins seemed just as content to sleep separately in their baskets as they were in their crib at home.

On the eleventh day work on the wall slowed a bit when Fenris and Bethany entered the heat house. Most of the alphas had made themselves scarce to avoid her strong pull. Devin reported to him on the twelfth day that it was now no worse than what they had grown used to and work sped again. On the thirteenth day after Fenris had visited him the waiting was finally at an end.

It was mid-afternoon when Mary and Elin burst into the clinic with five of the ten children in tow. Seeing both of the currently pregnant mages with half of the children sent his heart into his throat and his stomach to his shoes. If Meredith showed unexpectedly, the young and vulnerable were to gather with Anders.

He rushed out the door of the clinic with his staff held tight trusting his own frightened children with them. Ella ran up the path, one of the youngest children wrapped tightly around her, and two others running at full speed just ahead of her. She was followed by two of the five Templars chosen to guard them.

“Hurry,” he yelled looking past them to where most of the others had been working on the wall. Now that he was outside, Anders could hear yelling and the faint sounds of battle. Smoke was beginning to drift up from one of the houses nearest the unfinished section.

Ella and the two children raced past him into the clinic. The Templars skidded to a halt beside him and turned to face the path, swords and shields held ready. Everyone had been carrying their weapons with them for weeks. It was impractical to work in full plate but many had leather armor that wasn’t quite as bad for hard labor.

Anders turned to the man at his left and asked, “Where are the other two children and the other three?”

“I saw Feynriel with the kids,” he answered. “They shouldn’t be that far behind us.”

“Keran was with Feynriel,” the other added. “I’m not sure about Jack and Lionel.”

The three of them watched the path anxiously and soon Feynriel appeared through the thickening smoke. The last two children ran beside him and moments later Keran appeared as well. Feynriel rushed past him into the clinic with the children.

“There’s a group of them following us,” Keran said sounding slightly winded as he stopped in front of them.

He turned as the first of them became visible. Bare blades glinted in the darkening afternoon sun held by rough looking men. The three Templars charged to meet them and Anders began casting. Moments later Anders was flanked by Feynriel and Ella, both frightened but determined.

“You attack, we’ll heal,” Feynriel said.

Anders nodded and flung a fireball at one man who managed to get around Keran. The first group they defeated easily as well as the second. Keran, Hugh and Ursula matched them blade for blade while the apprentices to either side of him kept the Templars on their feet. Anders threw fire and ice, green glyphs that stopped any who stepped on them and called lightening from the cloudless sky.

The air was full of smoke when the first of their people started appearing on the path to the clinic. Anders dared to hope it was over, immensely glad that Devin at least was still alive. The rest of the afternoon was a blur of triage and healing as more wounded came up the path. The only rest he got was when he had to feed Evelyn and Flynn.

Afternoon had bled into evening when the fires had finally been put out. The clear area in front of the clinic was now a hospital ward. The worst of the wounded, some carried up the hill by healthier members of the village, were inside the clinic. Magic was saved for these people. Any who were not in mortal danger had been cleaned and bandaged.

He worried constantly for the people he cared the most about that still hadn’t shown up, Devin, Karl and Carver. He also worried for Fenris and Bethany. They were the two most vulnerable people in the village. Anders had learned from those who had appeared, the heat house was untouched by fire that had taken three other dwellings. There was a good chance that they were still safe inside and he felt a little relieved.

Devin finally appeared around suppertime. Anders was seated on the ground not far from the clinic in a clear spot at the top of the path. Flynn slept in his basket, Evelyn at his breast and he picked tiredly from a plate of food that had been delivered to him by one of the children. Devin sunk wearily down next to him, legs crossed, forearms resting on his knees. His shirt was cut in several places and spattered with blood. Anders could see that he had several wounds but none appeared to be too bad.

“I’m so glad to see you,” Anders said softly leaning against him for a moment. “Are Bethany and Fenris okay?”

“They’re fine,” Devin said his voice oddly flat. He took Anders’ free hand and gripped it tightly. “Car…Carver, Sebastian, Varric and a few other betas protected the house. She hired mercenaries…there were so many of her alphas drawn there because of…Bethany’s heat.” Devin paused and a short mirthless bark of laughter escaped him. “In a way that worked to our advantage, it made them stupid. But…they were still overwhelmed. Carver…” His voice wavered and Devin stopped for a moment. “I couldn’t get there in time. That _bitch_ wouldn’t let me.”

“Devin…is he…” Anders asked fearfully.

“He’s gone…” said Devin almost inaudibly squeezing his hand tightly.

Anders closed his eyes and gripped Devin’s hand just as hard.


	40. Chapter 40

It was very late by the time they stumbled home. After seeing Evelyn and Flynn to their crib, both sleeping peacefully and blissfully unaware of their loss, Anders and Devin fell into bed. As tired as they were, neither of them fell asleep right away. He worried about Devin and about Bethany. For now there was nothing he could do for Bethany and he wasn’t sure what he could do for Devin.

Anders noticed how still his hands were. Fingers that always moved, tracing patterns on bare skin or following the line of a scar, were completely still. He had seen Devin angry, joyful, wistful, half-crazy when they were both in the grip of the longing, frustrated, sorrowful and full of worry. Never once had those hands been completely still.

Devin gripped his arm suddenly and he could hear a soft but sharp intake of breath in the stillness of their room. Anders remained quiet, covering the hand on his arm with his other hand. After another quiet shuddering breath he knew that Devin was crying. He squeezed the hand under his, hoping that Devin would understand.

He didn’t think less of him. Anders knew that no one alive had seen him cry, couldn’t even allow him to see. When their mother died, he imagined Devin had disappeared into the woods surrounding Lothering to vent his grief. There hadn’t been time when their father had died for grief. He would have had to work through it on the ship from Gwaren. By morning his tears would be gone and everyone would see the man he wanted them to see. Devin let go of his arm and turned his hand, gripping it tightly like he had earlier. Anders closed his eyes and remained silent, letting a few tears of his own roll silently down his cheek.

Anders spent the day after saving as many lives as he could, often working with one of the twins held to his breast. Any mage with even the slightest healing abilities could be found at the clinic as well. Most of everyone else who could began clearing out the bodies of their attackers. Anything useful was taken off of them and placed in a pile. The day after that, the bodies were burned in one of the clear sections of forest that surrounded the wall.

Early that same morning, Fenris brought Bethany to the clinic. Her face was tear streaked, eyes red rimmed and puffy. She clung to him stubbornly on unsteady legs but the elf convinced her to stay there and rest with a promise that he would be back. Bethany then clung to Anders as more tears flowed down her cheeks, soaking into his shirt. Fenris touched her shoulder lightly and looked up at him. He pleaded with his eyes, help her, and Anders nodded his understanding.

Fenris whispered in her ear followed by a tender kiss to her cheek. He then asked where Devin was. Anders told him and he left looking as worried as Bethany was heartbroken. She slept eventually, like most mages she was exhausted after her heat. When she woke, Anders made time to speak with her. He wasn’t sure if he convinced her that Carver’s death wasn’t her fault. Even though they’d spent years apart they shared something most siblings didn’t and she felt his loss keenly. Anders did convince her that Devin didn’t blame her. Devin hadn’t said it outright but he knew that the man placed most of the blame on himself for not being with Carver.

She helped care for the wounded until Devin and Fenris showed up around suppertime. Brother spent quite a bit of time consoling sister while he and Fenris watched sitting a little apart from them. They both lamented their inability to ease any of their bonded’s grief. Only time would heal this wound. Five Templars and three mages lost their lives that afternoon, three more Templars died from their wounds in the following days. Only two bonded pairs had been broken. Ser Thrask and Mharen found a measure of comfort in each other, they understood the others grief in a way that no one else in the village could. A large pyre was built and the dead lay upon it. They listened to Sebastian speak comforting words and the fire was set. The grief stricken village mourned even as they continued working.

Rubble was cleared away, crops were tended, work on finishing the wall resumed as well as fixing and cleaning the remaining buildings. The heat house remained empty for two weeks after Fenris and Bethany left it. Karl, Cullen and Devin encouraged couples not to fear and reassured that the immediate danger was past. The next couple to occupy it was Keran and Feynriel. They hadn’t announced their intentions but they made sure they were seen entering. Their simple actions seemed to lift the pall that had fallen over the village.

Gradually the mood shifted from gloomy to content. Another mage was confirmed pregnant while Keran and Feynriel were still in the heat house which also helped lift spirits. There was more cheering and congratulating when Bethany was also declared pregnant just over two weeks later. The next day Anders sat with them and Devin a little ways into the woods. It was a sort of private celebration for them.

Lunch had long been eaten and the leftovers stored away. The twins were now just under three months old and much larger than they had started out. They nursed longer, stayed awake more often and Evelyn had even managed to lift her head when laid on her tummy. The four of them sat at the edges of the blanket, Evelyn on her back in the middle. She kicked her legs and smiled at the silly faces Devin made. Flynn was still nursing, tugging on Anders’ shirt every now and then with one hand while the other held his finger.

“They’ve grown quite a bit,” Bethany said running a finger up Evelyn’s bare foot. She smiled and kicked again, turning to look at her. “Carver would have adored her I think.”

“I’m just glad he got to see them,” Devin said softly. “In his own way, he was as excited as I was.” There was a brief moment of silence until his teasing smile surfaced. “How about you Fenris? You seem a little more excited than I’d expect.”

Fenris smiled briefly as he gazed down at Evelyn for a few moments. “I was expected to care for them but was not allowed to love them. It will be…different…knowing that this child will know me as its father.”

“Maker,” Devin said in disgust. “The more I learn about Tevinter the more I think it should be razed.”

“Many have tried,” Fenris said calmly reaching for Evelyn. “None have succeeded.”

“One crusade at a time please,” Anders complained. “It’s going to take more than our lifetime to get the Circles disbanded.”

“Don’t worry little rabbit,” said Devin smiling. “I think I’ve had enough of open fighting.” His smile became teasing again as he continued. “Besides, I’d hate to have to dress you as a woman again. I like you better as a man.”

Anders grimaced before looking down at Flynn. He was still suckling, watching Anders with wide eyes. “I’d prefer not to have to do that again either. It won’t matter either way until I go into heat again. I’m starting to worry.”

“Six months,” Fenris said distractedly. He held Evelyn in his lap, her legs pushing at his stomach as she kicked. She cooed and reached for him, endlessly fascinated by his lyrium markings. Fenris smiled and stuck his tongue out at her. Evelyn smiled broadly before trying to mimic him.

“I think he’s going to like actually being a parent,” said Devin grinning. The tips of his ears colored slightly and Fenris carefully set Evelyn down on the blanket.

“What happens in six months?” Bethany asked curiously reaching for his hand.

“The heat cycles,” Fenris explained taking her hand. “It took six months for his heats to resume after each child was born.” He gestured at Anders and Flynn. “I believe nursing an infant prevents it for a while.”

“That makes sense,” Anders said after a thoughtful pause. “I’ve been a little worried about taking care of them during a heat.”

“That will be good to know,” said Devin. “We’ll need to make sure we let everyone else know. A little less to worry about never hurt.”

“Four more children,” Bethany said happily. “Five if you count Feynriel.”

“It’s a decent start,” Anders said smiling. Flynn tugged on his shirt again and Anders saw that he had slowed considerably. He repositioned Flynn, still careful to support his head, and rubbed his back. “It will be a long time before we know how many more mages we have though.”

“Do you wish to know now?” Fenris asked seriously.

“We’d love to,” Devin said with a shrug. “There just no way to be sure until one of them manifests.”

“There is a way,” Fenris said looking between them. “I would appreciate it if you told no one else what I am about to tell you.” After a nod from both Anders and Devin, Fenris continued. “These markings give me a connection to the Fade that no alpha or beta was meant to have. You have seen most of the abilities that they give me. I cannot cast magic but through my markings, I can feel it in others. Age does not matter, as young as they are if either of them has that connection I will be able to feel it.”

“Can’t imagine that’s very useful,” said Devin. “What do you have to do?”

“Generally it isn’t,” Fenris said nodding his head. “There are so few free mages outside of Tevinter that it’s mostly useless. I only need to concentrate but touching them would help me focus.”

Devin glanced at him and he nodded. The knowledge wouldn’t affect how he felt about either child but it would be nice to know if either of them needed to be watched in a few years. Not every manifestation of magic was dangerous but quite a few were. Devin turned his gaze back to Fenris and nodded.

Fenris took Evelyn’s foot, holding her tight enough to stop her kicking but not hard enough to hurt. Flynn looked over at him as he took the boy’s hand. He smiled and closed his fist around Fenris’ finger. Evelyn continued trying to kick but was thwarted by the elf who sat quietly with his eyes closed. Before she could begin crying out her displeasure the markings flared briefly and he let go of her foot.

“He is omega,” Fenris said moving his finger up and down. Flynn smiled again and moved his arm like Fenris had.

Anders smiled over at Devin as he lifted Evelyn to him. She stopped fussing as he soothed her and returned his smile.

“We should be getting back,” Devin said after a moment. “There’s still a lot of work to do.”

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Conditioning](https://archiveofourown.org/works/4578852) by [KPP (mad2Bhere)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mad2Bhere/pseuds/KPP)




End file.
